Tips & Suggestions

One of our members, who happens not be be Jewish (but enjoys Jewish teachings), shared some of the tips that helped him in his journey to recovery. I bring you here part of his letter:   "To deal with pornography that is a more serious problem, bordering on addiction, it is necessary to cut yours...

Often, people just don't trust the power of Torah to save them from the clutches of the Yetzer Hara. They try everything, the 12 steps, meditations, psychotherapy, etc... but they won't sit down and learn a ;blat of Gemara. My friends! Gemara is ;"sechel hayashar" - "straight thinking". When a p...

Kids think that dolls look so human. They are fascinated with them and have fun playing with them and imagine that the dolls are real. We always have to remember this fact. All the fascination that we have with sexual desire and with the beauty of women is fake. It is satisfied in ten seconds, an...

"I have tried to stop over and over, but just can't seem to. I have even gone like 3 or 4 months without porn, but always the desire grows so strong that life seems too dull and worthless to live without being able to indulge in the viewing of women... " We would like to address this phenomenon, ...

Bitul (self-nullification). Learn to think "Who am I to want anything? We are not here for pleasure. I am doing the work of the king every time I say "No". What more can a Jew want in this world? Along these lines of ;Bitul, ;R' Nachman offers a powerful suggestion. Whenever you are feeling weak...

Learn how to bear the mental pain of saying "No" to yourself. Naturally, we go to what feels good and we stay away from pain. We got that from cows. Animals don't understand that a painful experience can be beneficial. Try and explain surgery to a cow. All the cow understands is "Food", I go. "Pa...

If you can't stop looking at pretty women, keep this in mind. From the smallest baby, to the prettiest woman, to the old fat man down the street, human beings are all made out of the same stuff; blood, veins, muscle tissue, guts and fat--all covered over with a thin layer of skin. Keep that in mi...

We all believe in "S'char Ve'onesh" (divine reward and punishment). So here's a tip for staying strong and guarding your eyes. Sometimes we tell a child that if he does a Mitzvah he will get as much candy as he wants in the next world. This isn't a lie because the reward will be much greater than...

One of our members sent us their story recently. I think we can all learn a lot from it. I struggled as a teenager with pornography and masturbation, mostly as an escape mechanism. ; When I got married I thought all my problems would be solved. ; However, I equated love with sex and became very m...

Someone wrote on The Forum that ;he had overcome ;his addiction and ;was doing good, but ;he requested help now that he was working in an enviorment ;with non-Jewish, young women and felt he was again in danger of slipping back into his old ways. In response, a Frum psychologist wrote as follows:...