The Library

On the one hand, we can't fight the YH ourselves and the only true way to succeed is by surrendering the victory over to Hashem. But, at the same time, we can't just continue to do what we've been doing and say "Look Hashem, I'm in your hands now so don't have complaints ...

Hashem blessed me with another sober day... Thank you, Father... I've noticed that as my sobriety gets better, so does my learning... Like I've always been kidding myself that the addiction had no effect on my other areas... My work is getting better, my learning is getting better... I feel like it's been a real gift from my Father in Heaven these past few weeks.... Just got to roll with him...

Hi, Kol khakavod on this site! B"H I have had great siyatta dishmaya all my life, even though since I am 12 I have burning passion. (When I was 13 during studies in class, I had to literally inflict blows and bruises on my flesh in order to chase away fantasies). But I wa...

Vayikr a Why the small Alef ? Without the Alef it reads: Vayikar . Happenstance. Coincidence. By chance. Insert an Alef . Insert Hashem - The Alufo Shel Olam (The Nobleman of The World).... Now it is: Vayikra !!! By invitation. By design. Premeditated according ...

The first Korban brought in the Parsha is an Olah. Usually the Olah was brought as a Nedava to show Hashem how much we appreciate all that he does for us. But, the question is, do we really appreciate all that He does? When we walk out in the street and we see trees growi...

Someone wrote on the forum: I am a young married guy and I am desperate for help. I have been married almost 3 years and all this time I have had a problem with pornography, masturbation, and infidelity. My wife wants to leave me.... We tried therapy but just can't co...

My G-d, if I had porn available to look at and actually used it, I'd be toast. My life (i.e. my state of mind) would be immediate gehinom. I'd be gnawing myself to death with my little, desperate and complicated thoughts about 'ruchiyus or struggles with other people; eve...

When you try to make peace, either for yourself or between two other people, expect setbacks. They are part of the process. Many people are happy, even excited, to make peace when they see steady progress. Even if progress is slow, they are patient. But when they are face...

Rabbi Simcha Feuerman, LCSW-R, sent us the following overview on how he views the problem of lust addiction, and his solution through therapy: My clinical orientation is psychodynamic, relational, family systems, CBT to correct distorted thinking and beliefs, EMDR to rep...

Someone wrote to Dov: At night, I need it to sleep. And even if you'll tell me that's not true, if one thinks he needs something to sleep, he can't sleep without it. I need a plan how to get this idea out of my head. This keeps on being my biggest sticking point. Even...

Beginning of Day Prayer (BB 86-87) O God, direct my thinking, so that it may be divorced from Self-Pity and from dishonest and self-seeking motives. Let me make every decision and begin every action in You and continue it only thru Your Inspiration. Throughout this day, ...

Chevra, See the picture below. We have a choice of two pairs of Glasses to wear in life. The "Dark Pair" of Glasses that have been practically welded to our head after years and years of living our OWN Design for living. Or the "Rose Colored" Glasses that we get by workin...

With happiness and joy, I am grateful to Hashem for a blissfully sober day... I hit an SA meeting yesterday which was good... Last night I did something that was kinda weird for me... I baked a chocolate cake with my wife. After everyone went to sleep, I joined her in the...

"I have Emunah problems because of my acting out", and "I just don't daven right." Ask the average yeshiva bochur or shul member to say the Sh'ma in front of a bunch of other yeshiva guys/shul members. Then ask one to say it in English ! Rav Avigdor Miller says an eitz...

Here are a few STEPS TO STAY CLEAN AND SOBER: 1) Always first: have a good long conversation with HaKadosh Baruchu. He just wants to hear from you again. Maybe your "signal strength" got a little low. How many "bars" were you holding before the slip? 2) CHECK OUT YOUR...

The joy is great, and so the pain. 15 years of desperate cries, with no answer. At last there is a light to be seen at the end of the tunnel. 15 years of trying every method in the books. 15 years of having a double life. 15 years of silence and being hopeless. 15 years o...

We are on vacation now for a few days iy"H. We were less than a second away from a major accident just as we were about 2 minutes from the motel, after driving for about 3 hours. It was so close that my wife was shaking for about 15 minutes after, and she's usually qui...

Maybe only He has the answer for you. We only have to listen. Isn't easy to listen. Maybe it's not a pretty answer. But you know in your heart that it's true. And you're honest enough to know you really really need help badly with this not so pretty picture. This n...