Today, I woke up with that horrible feeling inside me, urging me to "act out". I went to shachris, and the feeling grew stronger and stronger. I didn't know what to do. Then it occurred to me, "what will happen of I do not watch porn and 'act out'?" "Nothing!" But what w...

My words cannot express the amount of agony, angst, joy, and pressure leading up to this day. The smoke has begun to clear, and another 90 days are barely seen in the distance. But, I can proudly say that I have walked up this hill with full efforts, 'all in'! The only w...

It's now been a full year!!! I can't believe it. It's been some journey. My emotions are mixed and powerful. I joined this holy forum 1 year ago as a broken fellow - engaging in pornography and phone sex from time to time. Masturbation was not a problem - but oh my!...

Dear GYE, I am 32 years old, and this struggle has brought me to places in the last few years that I do not want to mention. I WAS FIGHTING EVERYDAY, ASKING MYSELF “AM I NORMAL OR NOT?” But B"H, thanks to GuardYourEyes, I am almost 5 months clean today. A few weeks into...

A newby to GYE wrote to us: When I first wrote my story on the GYE forum, I was crying, shocked and disgusted with myself. I felt I couldn't fall any further- rock bottom's the word! But fast forward no less than 3 weeks, and I fell again. And this time even further tha...

Two days ago I was feeling totally filled up with lust. I was downtown all afternoon with some stuff to do and a lot of waiting in between. I made the mistake of wandering into a book store to pass the time. I was on guard against the magazine racks, but the regular best...

I think somewhere in the holy books (maybe Rambam) it says that you know that you actually have done tshuvo is when the same situation arises, you withstand the temptation this time. I'm sure Machshova Tova can find the chapter and verse and the exact loshoin, in fact I w...

I slipped during last summer on a trip to Las Vegas. At every level of this disease, when you fall you fall at a higher level and its easier to cope and get back up. (Sheva Yipol Tzaddik V'kom - a Tzaddik falls seven times and gets up again). I had stopped going to m...

I usually feel like I'm not getting anywhere in recovery. However, I recently celebrated a year of sobriety, which gave me a chance to look back and see that I really have made some progress. I have actually been on the road to recovery for about three years. I started as...

A German Yid once traveled to the tzaddik Reb Pinchas of Koritz to request a bracha for his daughter who had suddenly become blind. "The reason," said Reb Pinchas, "is that her father is also blind and this is a hereditary disease." The Yid protested, "But my eyes are per...