As I was reading through some of the hashgacha pratis stories on this site, I was inspired to share an amazing story that happened to me a couple of years ago. Baruch Hashem, I have done sincere teshuva for my old ways and would never find myself in this situation again,...

I first began stimulating myself long before my bar mitzvah, and certainly before I knew and understood what I was really doing. Forgetting about the aveira involved in it, when I was first motzi zera levatala, I was shocked and scared because I didn't know what my body w...

Something happened a few minutes ago that I thought was amazing: I was about to fall. It was after a long day of temptation, at about 11:15PM, and as I was about to start acting out, I heard someone try the handle of my front door! I immediately ran upstairs to tell my ...

Although it took place more than fourteen years ago, the conversation I had with my Rebbi, Rav Mosheh Twersky zt”l Hy”d, in the wake of 9/11 remains vivid in my mind. As I imagine many people felt at that time, a sense of emotional disorientation and feeling rudderless ...

Last night was my close friend's birthday so he decided to go out for a meal and then to see a certain film in the cinema. I had a look at the parental guide of the film, and decided that it's definitely not for me, and it will definitely not benefit my recovery...Howeve...

Porn ruined you. Ruined us. When people asked, shocked, how I could leave such a funny, clever man, father of my children – “a good earner” as my mother put it – what could I say? I said it was me. My fault. I’d changed. Only it wasn’t me. It was your love of porn that s...

A little victory tonight. I was alone in the kitchen when I noticed a magazine (of women's under garments) had arrived and was sitting on the counter. I immediately had a flashback to a few years ago. I was tutoring a non-religious kid in his home, and one day I was alo...

Today, I woke up with that horrible feeling inside me, urging me to "act out". I went to shachris, and the feeling grew stronger and stronger. I didn't know what to do. Then it occurred to me, "what will happen of I do not watch porn and 'act out'?" "Nothing!" But what w...

My words cannot express the amount of agony, angst, joy, and pressure leading up to this day. The smoke has begun to clear, and another 90 days are barely seen in the distance. But, I can proudly say that I have walked up this hill with full efforts, 'all in'! The only w...

It's now been a full year!!! I can't believe it. It's been some journey. My emotions are mixed and powerful. I joined this holy forum 1 year ago as a broken fellow - engaging in pornography and phone sex from time to time. Masturbation was not a problem - but oh my!...