The Library

Before I share what works for me, I want to thank this wonderful organization from the bottom of my heart for the amazing things it has accomplished.  Without the GYE community, I would be lost as I try to navigate this increasingly insane world.

A few months ago, I was very down. I had just broken my longest clean streak of 194 days. For 8 days, I rolled in the filth, and then decided to get myself back up again, and try for the 2nd round of 90 days clean.

I'm a sincere guy who really just wants to do Hashem's well. Like most men, I have a daily battle with my yetzer hora. Mostly it's about fantasies, and letting my mind wander into the wrong places. Sometimes, it creeps into my behavior, like when I've just viewed a perfec...

I would like to share an experience I just had, which helped me in my porn addiction struggle. I understand that the following may not be something you feel comfortable sending out, but I thought I would try and contribute. I feel this is particularly poignant during Elul.

It wasn't until I walked into a room of fellow addicts and admitted my utter defeat and the unmanageability of my life (step one), and got a sponsor to help me work the 12 steps that I was given the gift of sobriety.

I have been struggling with shmutz on the Internet. I was addicted to personals ads on a well-known site for years. I used to talk to women, send pictures, and sometimes even meet up with them.

Many people tell me that I am not an addict. After all, has my addictive behaviors caused terrible harm and consequences? Have I lost my whole family?  Have I contracted AIDS? Have I given someone else a sexually transmitted disease?

I want to share with you something I experienced today. I have been trying to quit porn and masturbation for a while, having ups and downs with it. One of the reasons it’s been so hard for me is because, thank G-d, my wife and people around me do not know. I have been doi...

Yesterday, by the grace of Hashem and the help of the SA fellowship and GYE, I celebrated 600 days of sobriety! Thank you, Hashem! I've been on GYE for almost a year now, mostly in the chat rooms, and seeing that I've chatted with dozens of people here (even acquiring 2 s...

Porn ruined my ex-husband. Porn ruined me. I was married for 6.5 years. My husband was already addicted to porn before we got married. Ever since I got married, I realized something was completely off. My husband constantly criticized me and put me down. I was not pretty ...

*I was getting my teeth cleaned today - by a female hygienist who had to reach over me a couple times. והמבין יבין. I tried so hard to control my thoughts and think of Hashem's love in giving me this test. And, you know what she said to me? "Wow! You're a great patient! N...

I landed back in Newark clean b'h. There was one point towards the end of the flight where everyone around me was watching movies with explicit content and I felt the temptation. I took off my glasses asked Hashem to get rid of the urge and b'h it went away.

I am almost up to 40 days without a fall, and my wife is assur now, which makes things a little harder. Last night, I was reading business news and they had something about some woman etc. I googled who she was and a movie where she is the main actor came up. Not thinking...

1) A chaver who speaks/texts regularly with me, reached out for help today. His wife had been off limits for a very long time. There were very challenging moments, but with work and b'ezras Hashem he stayed clean. Today she was to go to the mikva but this morning she foun...

R' Avraham Alter ran a Yeshiva in Chicago for many years. He worked together with Baalei Teshuva. There was one fellow who was straddling the fence for a number of years. R' Avraham very much wanted this fellow to make a commitment. And he told the fellow, "You got to do ...

It was the week before Rosh HaShanah and I decided I will try to hold out from porn and masturbation the whole week. I was having a hard time but I kept pushing through. Then, a couple of days before the Yom HaDin, I was doing work in a place and there were some triggers ...

One Shabbat, there was a man who came to the synagogue of Rabbi Berel Wein, in the Rechavia section of Jerusalem, accompanied by his three young sons, whom it turned out were of the ages 9, 7 and 5. Even with their long peiyot, they didn’t look Jewish with their stunning ...

Realizing my biggest issue was probably self-esteem was monumental. As a human being and definitely as a Jew, one shouldn't waste their potential. Wasting seed and time over computerized false garbage is a sign of not admiring myself, and not realizing my potential. Thing...