The Library

Today I was sitting in the bus and I saw a man reading a newspaper. Now, I used to have huge problems with newspapers.I used to read them everyday, all of them (5-6)... The free ones... those are the most terrible ones!!The Pritzus, the rubbish, all the unhealthy stuff th...

Does anyone know what it feels like to sit in-front of a 72'' widescreen at 4am without a soul in sight, and with 10 bookshelves lined with DVDs of every sort, and to tell the ribono shel olam: "Tatte, the only reason I did not turn it on is because you don't want me to."...

I was doing library with a class of 5th graders. One of the girls starts telling me about the books that her mother reads; "love books", and the title of the current novel that her mother's reading. "But she doesn't let me read them". And then she looks at me with her big...

When I first heard about getting a filter, I was very resistant. It was about a month or two until my wife and I sat down together, looked through the information and installed K9. One catalyst was my involvement on the forum. Posting messages like, "Woops, just slipped...

Here is SilentBattle's first post: Hi. I call myself "SilentBattle" because these are battles that we all fight silently, on some level or another. There is no public honor. The plaques on the wall that declare our victories are in Heaven. For me in particular, I feel lik...

A couple weeks ago I flew in from California to NY for a wedding. It was difficult for me because I didn't really know anyone, and I had a really empty feeling in my stomach; you know, that feeling that I am "missing something" that leads to bad things. So I called a frie...

I just had an internet slip. I was looking up something totally safe - on a site which was supposed to be perfectly safe, and I came across some really weird indecent drawings. It was so weird that I had trouble overcoming the curiosity. BUT, I did leave the page fairly q...

Last night I wasn't feeling well, and on the way to Yeshiva I still wasn't clear what I would say in today's shiur. On the way to yeshiva, I saw something "very interesting" coming in my direction. The way I always reacted in such cases was to look really intently until s...

It's in times of courage that I remember to send you an e-mail... The Chizuk e-mails that I receive each day help me loads, and B"H things have picked up, and I can't stop thanking Hashem for helping me overcome lust in some nearly impossible situations. I'm the head of a...

I grew up in a frum family, relatively Yeshivish, though I did watch movies occasionally. I went through standard adolescent turbulence but turned out OK, boruch Hashem. I learned in Yeshiva for a bunch of years, and enjoyed learning. However, from the time I was young, I...

On Friday, I woke up on the wrong foot (after a nocturnal emission) and I was sure my day was only going to follow with disaster. To my surprise though, it didn't. Instead, this Shabbos turned out to be the most positive, meaningful, and fulfilling Shabbos I've had, maybe...

I was lying in bed last night, literally weeping, thinking about my father who passed away a little while ago. I began to think maybe I should push off my struggle for a less emotionally trying period. I began to think about slipping. I then opened up yesterday's chizuk e...

Just wanted to share a quick story. Last night I was coming home on the train, it was pretty late and there were all of these drunks coming home from parties and such, and of course everyone was dressed very immodestly. Out of nowhere, I felt mamash trapped in the good ol...

Welcome back everyone. Thanks to Guard & his platoon for the restoration of the forum. I want to share two events from when the site was down. The first event: a dream where I was watching a movie, late at night. And in the dream, my hand started to slip down. And whi...

I've had this gnawing feeling for a few days now. I remembered a non-Jewish acquaintance of the opposite gender from the distant past... Barely an acquaintance. I started having all these thoughts, justifying a simple little E-mail. I'll just mention the one thought I ha...

Many of you in this site probably don't even know me. I am a GYE old timer, who has been sober for close to FIFTEEN months through GYE, and still going, B"H. My commitment to sanity and sobriety is strong. If you want to get to know me better, you can read my journal t...

"Rage" writes about his first SA meetings: There are moments when I feel that God is trying to snap his fingers at me (perhaps impatiently)... Like the day I went to my first SA meeting. That morning I was like, "am I gonna go? Am I not? How much of a flake will I be ...

Two days ago, after a night spent feeding my sickness, I stumbled across an ad for this site and suddenly my eyes began to open. There was hope and a way to deal with this. I told myself that Hashem sent me here for a reason, and that reason is to get better. I realized t...