Years before I came to SA and recovery, someone showed me the 12 steps. I had a read of them and, to be honest, they went right over my head. Sure, I believed "in a Power greater than myself". What kind of a frum Jew was I if I hadn't "turned my will over to G-d"? I went through all the steps an...

Step One of the SA program ;is: ;"We admitted we were powerless over lust, that our lives have become unmanageable". ;So what does powerless actually mean? When I first got into the program, I was taught by a fellow member that what we mean ;by powerless is that I can't use lust like "normal" p...

"Shiviti- I have set God before me at all times." (Psalms16:8)Shiviti is an expression of hishtavut (equanimity): No matter what happens, whether people praise or shame you, and so, too, with anything else, it is all the same to you. This applies likewise to any food: it is all the same to you wh...

It's been frequently noted that to tell anyone, "I love you," we need first be able to declare the "I." And only when we develop a personal identity may we respond personally to life. So identification with another and with life is an art that starts with identifying ourselves. But there's a risk...

I read the article you sent me by this Rabbi criticizing the 12-step program. Rather than responding to each point, I would like to discuss a broader issue. Sexual addiction and pornography are now epidemic, even among frum people, and are destroying families. The following communications show th...

This had ;happened a while ago in Manhattan: Do ;you know that doors of a subway train do not open unless the conductor in the middle car presses the button? They do NOT act like an elevator's doors - if you stick your hand in an elevator while the doors are closing, there is an electric eye that...

We are on a path that leads us to become better people with greater insight and stronger character. ;A central theme on this path is learning to take responsibility for ourselves, our mistakes, and our choices as we deal with our situations. ;We can make progress on this path by noticing our de...

There's a saying that "A ship in harbor is safe, but that's not what it was built for." ; Us addicts may feel safe and in control of our own happiness while using our lust, even playing G-d a little bit at times by trying to control our lives' outcomes. But realizing that simply makes us into "s...

By ;Madisyn Taylor Sometimes when we break a habit or addiction we find ourselves missing it like a dear friend. Whenever we make the effort to free ourselves of an addiction or a habit we no longer need, we are often surprised to find ourselves missing the old pattern as we would a familiar fri...

We write down the details of our acting out history on paper (keeping it safe from other eyes, of course). Start with the first discovery of schmutz pleasure or sex in general, and what happened afterward, our next acting out habit behavior, the next ones, and how we went overboard with each, mai...