The Library

We were in contact recently with someone who claims that they have been trying to stop masturbation for many years and cannot succeed. The failures and the severity of the sin according to Chaza"l, were making him depressed, and this in turn would cause him to fall even ...

Elya K, moderator of the 12-Step Phone groups and Hot-Line, posted on the forum a few weeks ago: In Koheles, Chapter 11:9 it says: "Rejoice, Young man in your youth, and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth, and walk in the ways of your heart, and in THE SIG...

The core of the famous "12-Step" program and the secret to its great success, are the first 3 steps: 1. We admitted we were powerless over lust, and that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanit...

R' Avraham J. Twerski, world renowned expert on addictions, author of over 50 books and a great Talmid Chacham, is one of the guiding forces for our website. His advice, experience and immense knowledge, are invaluable to us and provide direction and technique for all of ...

Elya K (our dedicated 12-Step phone conference moderator) offers below a Frum "10 Step Program" as an alternative to the 12-Step program, for anyone that - for whatever reason - doesn't feel the 12-Steps "talk to them". Elya writes: I just attended a convention with 650 ...

I would like to bring an important message today from Elya K (moderator of the free 12-Step phone conferences) that he posted on the forum: I was recently at a conference, and one of the groups was having a discussion about internet filters and someone brought up the poin...

Download the video directly here, or see it on the Aish.com website here (if you can't watch Youtube videos [hopefully!] then click the link below the video to watch it in a different player). Dov explains the point of this video: The video is not so precious because it ...

Below are excerpts from the SA pamphlet called "Why Stop Lusting" from www.sa.org. Rabbi Avraham J. Twerski believes that joining a 12-Step SA group is the most powerful and sure way to break free of this addiction. However, even Rabbi Twerski agrees that it is not for ev...

Some may protest the above title. "Why do we need to look for psychological explanation when someone acts out sexually?" they protest. There is a simple explanation. It's called taivah (lust) and yetzer hara (evil inclination). Looking for psychological explanations, they...

Addicts have a problem -- their addiction. I had a problem -- my addiction and my inability to overcome it. Convictions got us nowhere. I had plenty of convictions. I was learning sifrei musar regularly and seriously for 20 years. Had I been in control, no doubt I would h...

The more we understand the underlying message the 12-Steps represent, the more we can understand the underlying message of Yetzias Mitzrayim as well. Those who work the 12-Steps into their lives, claim that they no longer have to fight the Yetzer Hara; Hashem does it for...

The 3rd step states: "We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him". In the past we tried to explain how this works: Instead of retaining the lust and trying to give up our will to Hashem, we surrender the lust itself to ...

Someone who we helped convince to join the 12-Step groups, sent us an e-mail recently as follows: I've had good groups of days, but the big picture is still horrible. I truly hope and am optimistic that one day I will climb out and help others too, but as of today it seem...

A member called "Yaakov" posted a reply to "eme" (edited): I have done the 12 steps without the groups, so I can testify that it is possible to grow from the 12 steps without the groups. However, those who went to the groups will tell that you will gain a lot by going to ...

We've discussed how the 12-Steps teach us how to stop fighting and give up our struggles to Hashem. As "kookoo" (who is already 3 years sober through the groups) once posted on our forum: "I don't overcome it, Hashem does it for me". But is this really attainable for most...

We have two members on our forum, Boruch and Shomer, both of whom are over 40 years old and Talmidei Chachamim in their own right. They have been accountability partners with each other for a long time, and they researched and purchased together the best possible accounta...

One of the prerequisites to working the the 12-Steps, actually - the very first of the 12-Steps themselves, is admitting powerlessness. In AA there is a consensus that a person can only work the steps properly if they have "hit bottom". As the originator of the 12 steps h...

In the past we brought a poem by "Momo" called "I will not disappoint". Well folks, I am sorry to disappoint. After another series of falls lately, Momo posted another poem on the forum called "I am Tired": I'm tired. I'm tired of struggling every day with this addiction....