The Library

The Ship in the Harbor

By obormottel
There's a saying that "A ship in harbor is safe, but that's not what it was built for." Us addicts may feel safe and in control of our own happiness while using our lust, even playing G-d a little bit at times by trying to control our lives' outcomes. But realizing that...
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Enduring Discomfort

By obormottel
By Madisyn Taylor Sometimes when we break a habit or addiction we find ourselves missing it like a dear friend. Whenever we make the effort to free ourselves of an addiction or a habit we no longer need, we are often surprised to find ourselves missing the old pattern as...
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First Step Inventory

By obormottel
We write down the details of our acting out history on paper (keeping it safe from other eyes, of course). Start with the first discovery of schmutz pleasure or sex in general, and what happened afterward, our next acting out habit behavior, the next ones, and how we went...
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Having Confidence in G-d as much as in the Schmutz

By obormottel
I am in the throes of a major lust attack which started some time around Tuesday and has continued through today (Friday). I have spent lots of time making calls, I have spoken to my sponsor, I attended a GYE kumzitz, I have been posting on the GYE forum, and in the cour...
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Re: What to Expect at your First 12-Step Meeting

By obormottel
In response to the article published in Issue #1219, we have received the following: This is a great topic. Thank you so much for covering it. I've been sober in SA for over 5 months now, and I was always scared of going to a meeting. I imagined I would meet all my close...
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What is your plan?

By obormottel
What
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By
While acknowledging your gratitude, indulge in the feeling of joy and peace that comes from living in the moment.
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By
Problem is, addicts just can't remember not to keep using their drug of choice. That's why they need sponsors and support groups to remind them.
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By
In addiction recovery, a sure sign a person is making progress is the re-emergence of the emotional life. Let yourself feel!
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Why does an S-Anon need to work a 12-Step program?

By the.guard
Many partners early in recovery don't believe they have any problems of their own. It is the sex addict who has all the problems, not them. Granted, his addiction is usually more devastating and definitely the priority early on for the couple's survival. It takes a while,...
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Sick of the "Nuclear Reset Button"

By the.guard
Tehillim, kedusha, and even the 12 steps with meetings, sponsors, written stepwork, and regular phone calls whenever in trouble, etc - none of them work at all if we still do not really need to stop. See, right after we masturbate, everybody wishes they'd stop! So us fr...
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What it means to be "Powerless"

By GYE Corp.
A sweet GYE guy who has been going to a few SA meetings, too, asked me to try and explain what "powerless" means and to try and clarify what "working his program" means in every day life. I did not do a very thorough job on #2, but #1 seems pretty clear to me... 1) Powerl...
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How to feel more joy and less dread

By GYE Corp.
A guy asked me: "First, the 12 steps seem so goyish to me, especially the idea of step 6, "became entirely ready to have G-d remove these defects of character". It just sounds so goyishe to me. Second, I keep feeling like G-d is screwing with me cuz so many obstacles and ...
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It's all in the Torah

By GYE Corp.
There is nothing in the 12 steps program that I and the dozens of other frum sober sex addicts I know use that is not found in Torah and Chaza"l. I would be happy to spend the time on the phone discussing the particulars of how and what. But this topic is actually not for...
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A letter to the wife of the GYE husband

By GYE Corp.
Before I begin, I reiterate that this letter is written by a Yid-little mr. yechida here. Your husband did not know I would write this and certainly didn't ask me to. It's important that you keep this in mind as you read this letter. An important disclaimer: every life an...
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Addiction is not a disease, it is an attitude

By GYE Corp.
Excerpts from an article on "Addictions" - by the renowned Psychiatrist, Carl Jung Addiction is not a disease, it is an attitude. Addiction, in the end, is a behavior that we choose to indulge. Addiction is something that you act on without thought of consequence. Addicti...
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Blow the illusion away

By GYE Corp.
On an article on Arutz Sheva called "The Internet Inclination", about the problems of internet pornography, someone posted in the "Talk-Back" his doubts that pornography could be classified as an addiction. In reply, "Velvel from Silver Spring" posted:   Just like with an...
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Communication with the wife in recovery

By GYE Corp.
Dear Chaver! It sounds like the two of you communicate quite a lot, sharing some feelings, and the bitter comments saying "she feels I ignore her", or that she is "exceedingly angry with me that I do this, or don't do that," that she lets you know she feels depressed, etc...
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