Member: I feel drained right now. I feel like I've been fighting the whole entire day. Dov: Airbag and seatbelt time....uh-oh. Either the outer environment needs to change, or the inner environment does. One of them has to go. If you believe it's from inside you, I do not...

Today most commercial flying is done on a radio beam. A directional beam is produced to guide the pilot to his destination, and as long as he keeps on this beam he knows that he is safe, even if he cannot see around him for fog, or get his bearings in any other way. As ...

Dear Confused! Of course, it can be related to your involvement with GYE! The problem we have is obviously increased when we keep thinking about it all the time. It does not matter if we are thinking about naked people - or about not thinking about naked people - either w...

A reality that I have shared before in many ways: Forum talk is cheap. That's why it will not work. For some it is y'kar erech - they simply cannot type it out at all...so when they do, it is meaningful and hence brings with it a new level of recovery for them. But for th...

When we make amends we need to be clear about what we're apologizing for and the best way to say we're sorry. What we are really doing with our amends is taking responsibility for our behavior. We need to be sure that the process itself will not be self-defeating or hur...

As one goes through life, one learns that if you don't paddle your own canoe, you don't move.--Katharine Hepburn NewcomerI appreciate the fact that you remain friendly and even-tempered even though I don't always follow your advice.SponsorFriends can disagree without ha...

The fourth step... involves accounting and preparation—they are interdependent, because how we account for the past is how we prepare for the future. In our program Inventory means "searching" we examine the mistakes of the past in order not to repeat them. In particul...

Let's cut right to the heart of the matter: We get in trouble if we try to run our own lives. Our ego starts to mess things up. We try to control things we can't control. We think we are smarter than we are. We start to think we can run things just fine by ourselve...

I feel very guilty when I do something really stupid. What's wrong with that? Yes, the guilt pain of masturbating does require many people to medicate all over again. So? Too many newbies make what they think is a 'recovery call' - but really they just want the 'older' gu...

I am an addict, so my truth is far more machmir than all the religious folk are. Misah bideai Shomayim, coreis, whatever... For me, it is misah bidei Odom - me. I really kill myself when I lust and act out, R'l. It's not "spiritual" death, and no violins are needed, thank...

I hate wet dreams and do not wish them on anyone. But here is what I have been given on that: I think it is a pretty much just silly pride for me to ever really buy the belief that a guy like me - no matter how much recovery work I ever do - really deserves to sleep free ...

ChaimYakov says: "I did ask this question in person no less than 4 times to 4 different Rabbanim. The answers I got in order were: 1) You need to get married 2) You need to get rid of the Iternet 3) You need to talk to your Rav about this 4) You probably won't be able to...

"Powerless" has nothing whatsoever to do with 'ilmolei ozro, eino yachol lo' and is not the flipside of 'hakol bidei Shomayim chutz miyir'as Shomayim', at all. Whether I am in control or not is a simple fact: if I cannot stop having sex with myself (most folks call that ...

Fruits are squeezed to get juice. Flowers are crushed to get fragrance. Diamonds are extracted to make jewels. So if you are being pushed in life - Fear Not!!! It's Hashem, trying to get the Best out of you.

No, you certainly do not have to tell your parents. I do believe, however, that your making a huge deal about rejection and shame if you would tell the parents is just not accurate. If your parents love you and are not very screwed up in the head, they will sympathi...

GYE Responds: Thank you for this nice share. Yes, what Dov always shares seems to be the only way to beat the yetzer hara at the end of the day. I was thinking recently, we find by the story of the Meraglim, that they clearly saw that אל פי טבע (naturally) there was no...

Principle One: Acceptance Key Concepts We need courage to live changed lives of serenity and emotional sobriety. The encompassing umbrella of the First Principle of Acceptance is the integration of a paradigm shift, freedom, consistency and willingness to move into a ...

Question: You say that only Hashem can give us ultimate victory over lust. Then, where does human willpower and bechira come into play? Here are a few good resources that can help us understand this sticky topic: 1) This PDF booklet discusses the issue in depth. 2...