The Library

I joined Duvid Chaim's 12-Step Phone group (which is starting a new cycle in February, IY"H) because he GUARANTEED me freedom from lust (remember - not "CONTROL of the addiction", but FREEDOM) if I run the course & do it right. I trusted him, especially because he kne...

As I have posted many times before, I was absolutely shocked to discover that my real problem was not Jewish/religious at all, but simply human. The main issue for me in those years of active addiction was always and only: "I am a poor oved Hashem". When my problem finall...

"EsaEinai" posted on the forum: Shalom, I just want to say thank you to everyone who has put this site together and all its contributing members!!!! For most of my life I have been dealing with these issues alone (over 20 years). Even though the greater portion of my lif...

On Duvid Chaim's phone group we defined the difference between being "outwardly religious" and being real spiritual people. A "religious" person is one who believes there is a hell. A spiritual person has BEEN to hell. And that's step 1: Hitting bottom. And as a result ...

My experience bears out that sharing our insides, our hearts with each other, is precious. In fact, it is likely the only thing that matters. That can't be done though, when we have something to "prove", no matter how pure our intentions are. The heart just doesn't seem t...

I just wanna say that working the 12 steps on Duvid Chaim's phone group was totally life changing. I seriously look at people differently now. One thing that Duvid Chaim said that really made a difference to me is that "everyone is doing their best".All parents want to be...

After I first got sober, I had nothing to do all night long (when I'd have been out messing my life up acting out, of course) and just couldn't get adjusted to actually sleeping at night. We had a little TV "just for the olympics" at first, that my sister bought us. To ma...

I am a broken k'li. I used to be molei busha uch'limah (filled with shame and embarrassment) while acting out. In recovery, I have come to see that I am a k'li sh'vurah (a broken vessel). That's when all my busha and ch'lima leaked out. Now I'm empty. Only Hashem can fill...

While I can't say that I'm grateful for my recent fall (after a long clean streak), I am grateful that I have come to see that I really wasn't getting the program. Someone with 25 years clean told me that "MY" program was not working for me. (Le'mashal - doctors do not se...

Hi. I am new to this forum. I recently slipped (33 days ago) after a clean streak of about 400 and something days. It was through this forum that I managed not slip again. I found it helpful to find people from the forum to speak to on the phone. There are many very selfl...

I have come to see that there really is something broken with me and that I need Hashem's help to be saved from it. I am an addict. That is the 1st step, as I do it.And I do it every day and all the time, whenever I remember. It's no big deal, it's just the truth about me...

You asked about SA's use of the term "Lust". You are bringing up chazals to understand the term, rather than using examples from your own personal experience - with your own problem. I'm all for chazal, but if we are trying to uncover what is really going on within us, ...

"Fear" is the darkroom where my negatives are developed.

"Anger" is but one letter away from "danger".

"Bardichev" wrote on the forum: So yes, I am past 90 days - but believe it or not, I also need a little Chizuk! 1) It's not fun any more.2) There is no WAR.3) The "C" bomb: Complacency 4) I want shmutz, but I really don't want it, but I really do, yet I really don't. Whil...

Take what you can use and leave the rest.

The price for serenity and sanity is self-sacrifice.

It's the first drink that gets you drunk.