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Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whateva...

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TOPIC: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whateva... 20215 Views

Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (+-100 words) 15 Nov 2015 05:43 #268606

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	Fire away!!!
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Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (+-100 words) 15 Nov 2015 05:58 #268608

peloni almoni
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it can be one or more or less of the following reasons:

1. its the only kind of corno that i know. as a good pious practicing jew, i never did like to pay for my corn.

2. its more attractive to get offered free good-quality high-definition corn. and i want people on my blog, watching my cornographic productions and submitting their own homemade corno's. so i (as yesod so eloquently put it) lure them in with the proverbial toothy grin, etc.
so in one word - advertising.

3. because its free

4. if you have to pay for jokes, they become less funny. its the truth. the whole time you're thinking if you got your money's worth instead of lightening up and enjoying yourself. the same is true with enjoying a good corno.

to be continued...

Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
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Last Edit: 15 Nov 2015 06:00 by peloni almoni. Reason: mom, please **** off

Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 22 Nov 2015 01:38 #269204

Yesod OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 827 Karma: 79	What is anyone doing on an early motze shabbas?

Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 22 Nov 2015 01:44 #269206

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	Latest news - SA OFFICIALY stands for SEX ATTRACTION unOfficialy stands for Shidduch Agency
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Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 22 Nov 2015 02:24 #269215

gevura shebyesod
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I'm going to a Vort tonight, does that count?

!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

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Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 22 Nov 2015 02:29 #269216

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	markz wrote: Latest news - SA OFFICIALY stands for SEX ATTRACTION unOfficialy stands for Shidduch Agency Gevura Shebyesod wrote: I'm going to a Vort tonight, does that count? Are you the Shadchan? You have 2701 posts on this website. Whats the link to your Shadchan site? Are married men allowed access?
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Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 22 Nov 2015 02:31 #269217

gevura shebyesod
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I meant, does it count as a Motzei Shabbos Vort.

Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 23 Nov 2015 18:57 #269405

shlomo24 Current streak: 1 day OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 2213 Karma: 135	Gevura Shebyesod wrote: I meant, does it count as a Motzei Shabbos Vort. That was like pulling teeth.
	If you're an LGBTQ or LGBTQ-questioning person and looking for someone who can understand you, feel free to reach out. I promise no judgement and to try and listen the best I can. Email: iam24zman@gmail.com

Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whatever.. 23 Nov 2015 19:30 #269416

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	Shlomo24 wrote: Gevura Shebyesod wrote: I meant, does it count as a Motzei Shabbos Vort. That was like pulling teeth. Made havdala yet?
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Re: Motze Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (100 words or less) 04 Dec 2015 16:53 #270448

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	markz wrote: That was a short Motzei Shabbos. No-one has posted on any of the forums for the last 2 hours. It's only me here Seems everyone's asleep already Is it midnight Motze Shabbos?? Where's everyone
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Re: Motze Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (100 words or less) 04 Dec 2015 20:52 #270462

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	May we all be Zoche to a Shabbos of Serenity!!! Serenity may you have a re-Mark-able Shabbos!!! All the best (I see you viewing this page now. I guess it's already time for tosefes Shabbos)
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Re: Motze Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (100 words or less) 06 Dec 2015 00:58 #270502

cordnoy
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Two girls decided to go otd.
They went to McDonald's and ordered cheeseburgers.
One started eating, and the other made a brachah first.
The first said, "hey, we are otd!"
The second apologized and began saying Boruch sheim....

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Re: Motzei Shabbos life - Vort, Joke, Like, Whateva... 06 Dec 2015 01:50 #270504

eslaasos
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Rashi says that Yosef was punished middah kneged middah for the lashon hora he said about his brothers. He told his father that they called the sons of the shfachos slaves, so he was sold as a slave, he said that they ate ever min hachai, so his coat was dipped in blood.
R’ Chaim Shmuelevitz asks how it was a punishment to him that his coat was dipped in blood?
He answers that a punishment is not meant to hurt you, the sole purpose is to correct your behavior. If the event makes you realize that what you were doing was wrong, then it has served its purpose.

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What do we replace it with....Life (Cordnoy)
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Re: Motze Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (100 words or less) 06 Dec 2015 04:26 #270532

serenity
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cordnoy wrote:

Reminds me of the guy who decided to go so frei, he started drinking his negel vasser.

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Re: Motze Shabbos life - Vort/Joke (100 words or less) 06 Dec 2015 16:03 #270554

Markz OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 8258 Karma: 428	"The sefaradim and Chasidim have one mutual disease" Rabbi Mizrachi HERE go to timeline 33:00, you can start from the beginning too...
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