Thank you for taking the time and interest to comment, your care is appreciated  - and so the example of Yosef  - I can appreciate the amazing strength that he had ..   

Thank you for taking the time and interest to comment, your care is appreciated    -  I am interested in your experience using this site and what gave you the most chizuk 

Thank you for posting your story. I can definitely relate to some of the feelings you wrote about, even though the situation is different.

At the end of the day, you can be satisfied that you made the right decision. It may not have been the outcome that you wanted, but you still did the right thing. It doesn't take away the negative affects it has had on your life and those affected by the abuser, but you still did the right thing, and that's something to be proud of. You acted in the right way, even though others did not. So you're not just Yosef...you're Pinchas!

Hey just now saw this thread.
You are not responsible for what happened to those kids. It is the fault of the perpetrator and of the therapist/“rabbis” who didn’t care enough about children being slaughtered in school.

I highly recommend going to therapy, unless you already are.

Hatzlocha

Ish MiGrodno wrote on 07 Oct 2021 03:38:

I completely disagree with the distinction that was made here between the fakers and the proud carriers of the mesorah. The point is precisely that we have lots of proud carriers of the mesorah who are knee-deep in sex addiction and rationalizations. That is precisely the point. It's also important to understand that sex addiction is a disease, and also that they really are proud of the mesorah.

This is hard to accept for people who think that sex addicition is not a real disease, that the world is made up of tzadikim and reshaim, and that someone who did a ton of p&m or abuse people can "do tshuva" and switch from rasha to tzadik.

I have already met two other frum people in SA and a rosh yeshiva told me that he thinks 80% of bochrim have had access to hardcore material, and I'm not hopeful. People have to understand that we have a systemic problem. We make new sex addicts every day and we don't even know we're doing it. It's not an accident.

anonymous.lost.everything wrote on 07 Nov 2021 10:14:

I think you completely misunderstood the point. Fakers don't mean sex addicts and "proud carriers of the mesora", non addicts. 


The fakers are the ones who don't deal with the issues and the proud guys are the ones who do. The wonder was that even though some of them are dealing with the addiction themselves they still have the strength to stand up for what's right as opposed to the fakers who prefer to just ignore them.

Thanks, WNGU.

Rabbeinu A.L.E. Shlit"a,

I literally have no idea what you are talking about. How on earth does the fact that someone is clinically addicted - justify his unwillingness to address his issue? Unless you are referring to someone suffering from psychosis, your opinion is foreign and completely unfamiliar to me. (And even if you tell me that many perps are trapped in the veil of secrecy / embarrassment that our society has created...that is irrelevant to a "carrier of our mesorah..")

Oh, and also, I don't appreciate the accusation that my post represents an oversimplification of the world as consisting of tzadikim and reshaim. Don't worry - I've been around the block (I deal with bochurim on a daily basis) and I can appreciate a nuance or two. And (as I believe that many of my close friends here on GYE can attest to) I try super hard not to engage in "fly by platitudes" so you can rest assured that I always give thought before I post (as I believe you do as well).

With friendship and respect; yet thoroughly confused in Grodno ~ IMG

Ish MiGrodno wrote on 07 Nov 2021 16:54:

I think rabbi ALE misunderstood your post as a comment about Lustaholics, when you actually meant to simply stand up against anyone being negative to Yeshivaguy.