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Lets get this party started
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TOPIC: Lets get this party started 7636 Views

Re: Lets get this party started 09 Apr 2021 05:28 #366572

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Wassup heiligeh yidden?
BH doing so well. Gonna go on a rant now so now's your chance to turn around if you don't want to spend the next few minutes reading someone else's life lol.

Im actually on a road trip with my fam in Utah of all places. Now there's a couple big nisyonos that are unique to this trip for me.
  1. Tourists are the most pritzusdike people ever! If only the goyishe olam could pick up some fashion tips from the amazing frum tzniusdike women. Halevai...
  2. I'm staying in a hotel room by myself. L'maiseh I know it is basically assur to do this but it's just my parents and me on the trip. They're staying in one room and me in another. Maybe I could share with my father. I'll see how tonight goes.


Also, as I had predicted, the filter on my pc is not only a lifesaver in regards to shmiras einayim online but also with productivity. 

Rabbosai, you wanna have true kavana every time you daven from now on? So think that every single tefilah you say could be your last. And don't just have it in the back of your mind- have in mind that you could literally get into a car crash c"v and be in shomayim in half an hour, or you could have a heart attack c"v, or if you live in NY with Cuomo (aka the malach hamavis) you're probably already dead... you get the picture. Think when you go into shacharis, "What if this is the last shemoneh esrei I ever say in this world? If I am niftar today, do I wanna greet G-d in shomayim and regret I didnt daven to Him b'kavana this morning?" Just something I've been trying out and thought I could share this nice mussar with the chevra here. Lmk if anyone tries it out and how it works for you pls.
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan
Last Edit: 10 Jan 2024 19:20 by DeletedUser825.

Re: Lets get this party started 09 Apr 2021 20:21 #366601

Rabbosai, you wanna have true kavana every time you daven from now on? So think that every single tefilah you say could be your last. And don't just have it in the back of your mind- have in mind that you could literally get into a car crash c"v and be in shomayim in half an hour, or you could have a heart attack c"v, or if you live in NY with Cuomo (aka the malach hamavis) you're probably already dead... you get the picture. Think when you go into shacharis, "What if this is the last shemoneh esrei I ever say in this world? If I am niftar today, do I wanna greet G-d in shomayim and regret I didnt daven to Him b'kavana this morning?" Just something I've been trying out and thought I could share this nice mussar with the chevra here. Lmk if anyone tries it out and how it works for you pls.

Top notch mussar! Will do my best to implement this

Most concerning part about this rant is I'm not even drunk

Lolllll
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!


My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Lets get this party started 10 Apr 2021 18:39 #366613

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בינוני wrote on 09 Apr 2021 05:28:
Rabbosai, you wanna have true kavana every time you daven from now on? So think that every single tefilah you say could be your last. And don't just have it in the back of your mind- have in mind that you could literally get into a car crash c"v and be in shomayim in half an hour, or you could have a heart attack c"v, or if you live in NY with Cuomo (aka the malach hamavis) you're probably already dead... you get the picture. Think when you go into shacharis, "What if this is the last shemoneh esrei I ever say in this world? If I am niftar today, do I wanna greet G-d in shomayim and regret I didnt daven to Him b'kavana this morning?" Just something I've been trying out and thought I could share this nice mussar with the chevra here. Lmk if anyone tries it out and how it works for you pls.

Please let us know if this works long term

Re: Lets get this party started 11 Apr 2021 17:37 #366663

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So I'm at 6 days clean now BH. 
Had a weird night. Had another wet dream but I don't think I finished the orgasm bc when I woke up I was still extremely aroused to the point where it was almost painful. That was a big nisayon to deal with.
BH even me staying in a hotel room alone these past few nights (which is usually a colossal trigger for me to mb) has not rlly been a problem; I have not yet looked at shmutz or masturbated while in the hotel room. BezH it'll stay that way. 
Also started reading The Battle of the Generation book over shabbos. So much chizuk to chap even from just the first 2 chapters. 10/10 would recommend
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan
Last Edit: 11 Apr 2021 17:40 by DeletedUser825.

Re: Lets get this party started 11 Apr 2021 20:48 #366678

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Re: Lets get this party started 12 Apr 2021 03:18 #366696

Ya a huge battle of the generation fan read a chapter every night before bed (hard copy)
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!


My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 03:49 #366802

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Update on day 9
Overcame a huge test last night. C"v I don't want to trigger anyone but I feel it's an interesting point to share. So basically, I've been on a road trip for the past week and BH until last night I had not watched any TV in my hotel room. But last night, I was feeling a little bored and wanted to see if there was anything good on (wtvr that is nowadays) so decided to check out the TV. As soon as I turn it on, it comes up with a menu and one of the options was "adult movies". I was able to resist looking at that for a while but eventually I caved and decided to explore their shmutz selection. Was very tempted to watch, not gonna lie, and it even said whatever movie you choose will not be put on the room receipt. I honestly dont even know how I was able to overcome that urge (must've been some some divine neis). But it made me think that any child could turn on the TV, get curious when they see "adult movies", subsequently loose their innocence, and their parents wouldnt have a clue! Fortunately, there was no nudity on the movie covers. Also who would spend $25 bucks on a movie that ruins their soul? As you can tell, I got some serious issues with that TV...

On a lighter note, I want to make a public Thank You Hashem. I've been having problems with my phone service as my carrier cut me off and screwed me over right after I upgraded my plan thru them- BUT somehow b'chasdei Hashem we were driving thru the middle of the desert and suddenly my service started working again! Thank You Hashem!

Anyways thats my diary entry for today lol, thanks for reading
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan

Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 03:55 #366803

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Benoni. WOW! Time for an upgrade to ‘Zadik Gamur’
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Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 04:19 #366804

  • gevura shebyesod
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So you finally got away from the בנות מואב?
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 04:33 #366805

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Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 14 Apr 2021 04:19:
So you finally got away from the בנות מואב?

Haha yes BH made it out of moab, tho now i have to deal with the בנות סדונה (Sedona, AZ). Different place, same pritzusdik tourists. But gonna try to look at this nisayon with a different mindset like I'm very excited to pass it and make Hashem proud.
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan

Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 04:37 #366806

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Grand slam!
The crowd watching on high witnessed the #1 top play of the season.
You made history!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Re: Lets get this party started 14 Apr 2021 20:02 #366828

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Almost fell this morning. I won't get into details here but it was very  close. BH somehow I stopped myself. 

Also, I noticed lately I've been thinking a lot about what I want in a future wife. I know if I just continue in my avodas Hashem, He will provide me my bashert but I am just so excited for marriage...

On a separate note, a good friend introduced me to the kochos of perek 51 in Tehillim: 

לַמְנַצֵּ֗חַ מִזְמ֥וֹר לְדָוִֽד׃ For the leader. A psalm of David,

בְּֽבוֹא־אֵ֭לָיו נָתָ֣ן הַנָּבִ֑יא כַּֽאֲשֶׁר־בָּ֝֗א אֶל־בַּת־שָֽׁבַע׃ when Nathan the prophet came to him after he had come to Bathsheba.

חָנֵּ֣נִי אֱלֹהִ֣ים כְּחַסְדֶּ֑ךָ כְּרֹ֥ב רַ֝חֲמֶ֗יךָ מְחֵ֣ה פְשָׁעָֽי׃ Have mercy upon me, O God, as befits Your faithfulness; in keeping with Your abundant compassion, blot out my transgressions.

הרבה [הֶ֭רֶב] כַּבְּסֵ֣נִי מֵעֲוֺנִ֑י וּֽמֵחַטָּאתִ֥י טַהֲרֵֽנִי׃ Wash me thoroughly of my iniquity, and purify me of my sin;

כִּֽי־פְ֭שָׁעַי אֲנִ֣י אֵדָ֑ע וְחַטָּאתִ֖י נֶגְדִּ֣י תָמִֽיד׃ for I recognize my transgressions, and am ever conscious of my sin.

לְךָ֤ לְבַדְּךָ֨ ׀ חָטָאתִי֮ וְהָרַ֥ע בְּעֵינֶ֗יךָ עָ֫שִׂ֥יתִי לְ֭מַעַן תִּצְדַּ֥ק בְּדָבְרֶ֗ךָ תִּזְכֶּ֥ה בְשָׁפְטֶֽךָ׃ Against You alone have I sinned, and done what is evil in Your sight; so You are just in Your sentence, and right in Your judgment.

הֵן־בְּעָו֥וֹן חוֹלָ֑לְתִּי וּ֝בְחֵ֗טְא יֶֽחֱמַ֥תְנִי אִמִּֽי׃ Indeed I was born with iniquity; with sin my mother conceived me.

הֵן־אֱ֭מֶת חָפַ֣צְתָּ בַטֻּח֑וֹת וּ֝בְסָתֻ֗ם חָכְמָ֥ה תוֹדִיעֵֽנִי׃ Indeed You desire truth about that which is hidden; teach me wisdom about secret things.

תְּחַטְּאֵ֣נִי בְאֵז֣וֹב וְאֶטְהָ֑ר תְּ֝כַבְּסֵ֗נִי וּמִשֶּׁ֥לֶג אַלְבִּֽין׃ Purge me with hyssop till I am pure; wash me till I am whiter than snow.

תַּ֭שְׁמִיעֵנִי שָׂשׂ֣וֹן וְשִׂמְחָ֑ה תָּ֝גֵ֗לְנָה עֲצָמ֥וֹת דִּכִּֽיתָ׃ Let me hear tidings of joy and gladness; let the bones You have crushed exult.

הַסְתֵּ֣ר פָּ֭נֶיךָ מֵחֲטָאָ֑י וְֽכָל־עֲוֺ֖נֹתַ֣י מְחֵֽה׃ Hide Your face from my sins; blot out all my iniquities.

לֵ֣ב טָ֭הוֹר בְּרָא־לִ֣י אֱלֹהִ֑ים וְר֥וּחַ נָ֝כ֗וֹן חַדֵּ֥שׁ בְּקִרְבִּֽי׃ Fashion a pure heart for me, O God; create in me a steadfast spirit.

אַל־תַּשְׁלִיכֵ֥נִי מִלְּפָנֶ֑יךָ וְר֥וּחַ קָ֝דְשְׁךָ֗ אַל־תִּקַּ֥ח מִמֶּֽנִּי׃ Do not cast me out of Your presence, or take Your holy spirit away from me.

הָשִׁ֣יבָה לִּ֭י שְׂשׂ֣וֹן יִשְׁעֶ֑ךָ וְר֖וּחַ נְדִיבָ֣ה תִסְמְכֵֽנִי׃ Let me again rejoice in Your help; let a vigorous spirit sustain me.

אֲלַמְּדָ֣ה פֹשְׁעִ֣ים דְּרָכֶ֑יךָ וְ֝חַטָּאִ֗ים אֵלֶ֥יךָ יָשֽׁוּבוּ׃ I will teach transgressors Your ways, that sinners may return to You.

הַצִּ֘ילֵ֤נִי מִדָּמִ֨ים ׀ אֱ‍ֽלֹהִ֗ים אֱלֹהֵ֥י תְּשׁוּעָתִ֑י תְּרַנֵּ֥ן לְ֝שׁוֹנִ֗י צִדְקָתֶֽךָ׃ Save me from bloodguilt, O God, God, my deliverer, that I may sing forth Your beneficence.

אֲ֭דֹנָי שְׂפָתַ֣י תִּפְתָּ֑ח וּ֝פִ֗י יַגִּ֥יד תְּהִלָּתֶֽךָ׃ O Lord, open my lips, and let my mouth declare Your praise.

כִּ֤י ׀ לֹא־תַחְפֹּ֣ץ זֶ֣בַח וְאֶתֵּ֑נָה ע֝וֹלָ֗ה לֹ֣א תִרְצֶֽה׃ You do not want me to bring sacrifices; You do not desire burnt offerings;

זִֽבְחֵ֣י אֱלֹהִים֮ ר֪וּחַ נִשְׁבָּ֫רָ֥ה לֵב־נִשְׁבָּ֥ר וְנִדְכֶּ֑ה אֱ֝לֹהִ֗ים לֹ֣א תִבְזֶֽה׃ True sacrifice to God is a contrite spirit; God, You will not despise a contrite and crushed heart.

הֵיטִ֣יבָה בִ֭רְצוֹנְךָ אֶת־צִיּ֑וֹן תִּ֝בְנֶ֗ה חוֹמ֥וֹת יְרוּשָׁלִָֽם׃ May it please You to make Zion prosper; rebuild the walls of Jerusalem.

אָ֤ז תַּחְפֹּ֣ץ זִבְחֵי־צֶ֭דֶק עוֹלָ֣ה וְכָלִ֑יל אָ֤ז יַעֲל֖וּ עַל־מִזְבַּחֲךָ֣ פָרִֽים׃ Then You will want sacrifices offered in righteousness, burnt and whole offerings; then bulls will be offered on Your altar.



I love how it includes the greatest form of teshuva- helping others do teshuva and find their way back to derech Hashem.
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan

Re: Lets get this party started 19 Apr 2021 01:43 #367053

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I want hear from the chevra:
How would you celebrate overcoming the biggest nisayon of your life?
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?

Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan
Last Edit: 19 Apr 2021 01:44 by DeletedUser825.

Re: Lets get this party started 19 Apr 2021 03:00 #367062

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בינוני wrote on 19 Apr 2021 01:43:
I want hear from the chevra:
How would you celebrate overcoming the biggest nisayon of your life?

Hmm I have to think about it...
Putting aside the physical celebration; could you imagine how happy Hashem is!!?? 
He's looking down at you and just smiling!
That is what we are here in the world for; to fight nisyonos.
Wow you have such a huge zchus, I wish I could meet you and stand up for you!!

Could you share some details? Or is it going to be too triggering?


Keep it up,
HappyYid
Feel free to contact me happyyid613@gmail.com
My thread

Re: Lets get this party started 20 Apr 2021 19:49 #367176

On my computer it says beinoni is banned?
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!


My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com
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