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TOPIC: New to GYE 171 Views

New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 07:11 #362914

  • בינוני
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So I finally did it. I finally took the initiative to quit my addiction for good. The truth is, I’ve known about this site for a few years, but I never actually signed up until now for two main reasons:
  1. I was nervous to put myself out there bc I’ve never admitted any of this to anyone else before
  2. I thought I could quit my addiction without the help of others (this was clearly not the case)

Basically, I’ve been struggling with shmiras einayim since around 13yo and with zera levatala since 15 (I’m now almost 19). Even though I grew up in a secular family, I somehow managed to avoid masturbation for a good while after I started to have urges. In fact, in the last year I hold my record for abstaining from acting out at over 100 days. However, this is really only bc I was living in close quarters with 8 other ppl and there was no privacy. I also struggle with an intense SSA, and this is likely the only place I will admit that bc it’s something I will probably take to my grave. However the the primary reason I’m here is to overcome my internet addiction and procrastination habits. Since I started high school, I have fallen down a hole of bingeing Netflix, YouTube, playing games on my phone, etc. Basically anything to put off doing my real responsibilities. I think this actually goes hand in hand with shmiras einayim bc guarding your eyes should be about viewing anything that will cause one to be nichshal, even if it’s not explicitly assur (e.g. bingeing an “appropriate” tv show). Not only that but I noticed the more I just stay in bed and am mevatel my zman on my phone watching shows or whatever, the more likely I will be motzi zera levatala because my self-discipline was not the strongest to begin with. Chasdei Hashem I found this community bc otherwise who l knows where I’d wind up! Now it seems like there’s a ton of resources on here b”h but honestly I have no clue where to start. Any eitzos?
My thread: Let's get this party started

Who the heck is Benoni?


Procrastination is something best put off until tomorrow. -Gerald Vaughan
Last Edit: 08 Mar 2021 02:18 by בינוני.

Re: New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 11:03 #362919

  • EvedHashem1836
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Welcome to GYE!

B'ezras Hashem you will have much success on your journey 

See my PM
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!


My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Re: New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 11:38 #362922

  • Hy
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Hi Benoni,

Welcome!!!
I joined a little while ago but only recently started posting and putting myself out there. 
I can tell you that being active on the forums has made a huge difference in my motivation and resolve.
It also makes me update my count which also helps keep me on track!

Wishing you much hatzlocha!

Re: New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 13:35 #362928

  • anothershot
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Welcome to the brotherhood Benoni! 

That 1st step is sooo hard but you got past it! With the proper resolve anything is possible you can will overcome this! 

Stick around and you will learn some great tips and accomplish things you never thought possible!

Hatzlacha! 
Anothershot 
My threads:
Giving it another shot

One step at a time

Daily (I hope) Excerpt from Sefer Zos Brisi

I am going to beat this monster one step at a time... One day at a time!

Re: New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 14:06 #362934

  • Captain
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Hi Beinoni! Welcome! It's so good to "meet" you! Welcome to the GYE community!

Start by looking around on the forums, reading stories and tips, etc.

Also, please check out these great free resources:

Great book (ebook) for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation.

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/ 

Also, you can sign up for the daily GYE Boost emails/ whatsapps at www.gyeboost.org.

Looking forward to hearing more about your successes!
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/
Last Edit: 08 Feb 2021 14:09 by Captain.

Re: New to GYE 08 Feb 2021 14:18 #362936

  • DavidT
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Benoni wrote on 08 Feb 2021 07:11:
 Now it seems like there’s a ton of resources on here b”h but honestly I have no clue where to start. Any eitzos?

Welcome Benoni!
​You're story is amazing! A person with such a background and still have such a strong resolve... I bow my head to you in respect. 
Reb Nachman of breslev teaches that all eitzos need another eitzo on top of them, which is PRAYER! Pray to Hashem and he WILL help!
On a more practical level, being strongly in touch with others in this great community has helped many many people to gain new perspectives in life and grow together.
Keep on posting and keep strong! 
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com
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