yosefthetzadik wrote on 12 Jul 2025 20:45:

Yosef, how’s is going.
What is M?

HI everybody! Some happy news... I made it to day fourteen, two weeks!

I also am starting to feel different, not so much that I don't have the urges, but more in the sense that I have the confidence in myself to manage them. I have written previously about this inyan. Yet as I travel further on this journey to cleanliness I have come to recognize more and more just how important confidence in yourself when it comes to managing the urge is. The biggest problem is when you think your helpless.

Of course I don't mean chas veshalom that the main thing is to fight head on with the YH. Obviously that isn't wise, of course we aren't meant to put ourselves into a matzav of tayva lechatchila, the best way of fighting is by not walking into the YH's lair. However the metzius that we all know too well about is that you can't avoid him completely, eventually an urge will come and and we have to have a strategy for urge management.

What I have discovered from my experience is that ingredient number one is confidence. The second you think you have no shot, your not in a good place. Once you believe in yourself you can say hey I know I have this crazy urge but I'm not a slave to it. I can do what I want and I wanna focus on something else now instead of listening to the urge. The realization itself is tremendously empowering because for most people even if you don't feel it, your inner ratzon is not to act out, its just that you feel helpeless. 

Just wanted to share these thoughts... Here's to confidence in ourselves forever more, and a week of attaining our goals in kedusha! Thanx everyone for all your support and please help me keep chugging on!

                                          signing off with gratitude Hashem, to all you guys, and my mentors, yours truly jwbf

markz wrote on 13 Jul 2025 05:10:

I can't believe you are asking this question, what are you on this forum for?!? 

"M" Stands for Money!

Here on this forum we try to work only purely Lishma. So when we want to write Prizes & Money, we write P&M.

yosefthetzadik wrote on 13 Jul 2025 11:37:


I’m patient. Whenever you’re ready to spell it out, please do so.

It might help 

While you’re waiting, grab some popcorn and checkout some Dov boosts below 

Hi everybody!... 

So... today for a few minutes here and there I felt a little different. The yh made the sin look shiny and tantalizing for me in a different way then I've felt about it since a couple weeks. BH I didn't fall.

looking back I guess that if I had to say how I didn't fall (besides for the obvious hefty dose of sy"d) I would say I used a combination of tactics. I used my favorite tactic of calmly accepting the urge as taught to me by my great gye mentors, plus since tonight it was looking extra hard, I definitely had to throw in some distraction. Right now I'm feeling pretty safe bh.

 Just posting this bc I feel like its healthy for me to engage on the forum when I have a harder day.

                                                                                        yours truly, jwbf

justwannabefree wrote on 16 Jul 2025 04:45:

What a powerful post - thank you for sharing this with us! It's so inspiring to see how you handled a challenging moment with such wisdom and self-awareness.

The way you described your approach really resonates - that combination of calmly accepting the urge (what incredible mentors you must have!) while also knowing when to bring in distraction shows real growth and maturity in your recovery. It's beautiful how you recognized that tonight called for "throwing in some distraction" - that kind of flexibility and responsiveness to what you need in the moment is such a valuable skill.

I love that you're feeling safe right now, and even more, I love that you chose to reach out and share this experience with the forum. You're absolutely right that engaging here after harder days is so healthy - it keeps you connected to this community and reminds you that you're not walking this path alone.

Your honesty about how the yetzer hara was working differently today, making things look "shiny and tantalizing" in a new way, is really helpful for others to hear. It's such a good reminder that our challenges can shift and change, but so can our tools and responses.

Thank you for being vulnerable with us and for showing what it looks like to navigate a difficult moment with both siyata d'shmaya and practical wisdom. Posts like yours strengthen the whole community!