I feel the same as you. I don't think the taphsic would work for me - I never tried, and I can't say I'm reliable to stick to my promises, so I can't trust myself to promise anything

I have tried other methods which BH work for me. I can't push for them for you, cos I think they work for me cos I'm an aspie.
There are a few other solutions in the GPS in my signature.
All the best

I'm not a fan of taphsic because it smacks of the "trying harder" approach. Learn different attitudes, and learn to "live" differently - that for me is where it's at.

Hi, B"H I am holding by 11days clean, and am hopefully going to try to continue on my 90 day journey, with Hashems help. I am impressed with the way everyone offers advice, and encouragement to help each other on this forum. I always thought that I am from the only ones who are struggling with the issue of masturbation. I cannot believe the ideas and help that is available on this site, from so many people.

I was 14 days clean and had a fall, it was a very upsetting experience. Can anyone give me any ideas of what I can do to break free.

Is there anything specific that you can pinpoint that upsets you about the experience?

14 days is no small feat! On the chart there is a line that lists cumulative clean days, which is all of the days that we were clean since joining the chart even if they are not in a row. This is because even if we fall, our past successes are not erased - ever! We need to keep on starting again, (and trying new ideas, to make it work if the old ones keep on failing).
"FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking)" - Barditchev

Thank you very much for wanting to help me. The upsetting part is that I wanted to stay clean, and was successful for 14 days, and now fell. The fall feels very discouraging that I wouldn't be able to stay clean for long. In some sense I feel like this is part of my life and cannot view life totally without it. I know that this is not true and life can be better without it, however it is very hard for me to really believe that I can actually succeed in breaking free, and not feel like I am missing out on something.

Caim wrote:

wow! there is a lot in there.
-"The upsetting part is that I wanted to stay clean, and was successful for 14 days, and now fell". We all Want to stay clean. That's why we are here. The onlly question is How are we going about trying to get there.
-" The fall feels very discouraging that I wouldn't be able to stay clean for long.". Sure you can. I often feel the same way (whenever I fall), but so many others who were just as stuck (or more) have been able to do it, - so can we.
-"In some sense I feel like this is part of my life and cannot view life totally without it." That's true. I'm not sure how you meant it, but even when we will iy'H succeed in staying clean, it will always be there, and we will always need to be on our guard. It can certainly be done, and it's not as hard as time goes on, but it's a part of our lives.
"I know that this is not true and life can be better without it," Life can be way better without it.
" however it is very hard for me to really believe that I can actually succeed in breaking free, and not feel like I am missing out on something". You, me, and all of us here, can most certainly succeed and if you ask me, the only thing that we are missing out on today is some food, that's making me think of all kinds of depressing thoughts. There should be some kind of patur for us not to fast since it can lead to a fall.

Thank you very much and I really appreciate you taking the time to give me Chizuk.

In regards in what we are missing out today, I really wish we wouldn't have to fast today since I am still missing out on my morning coffee.

i never asked but the last time i fasted i felt like i was becoming more and more vulnerable and falling was becoming much more of a probability. my sponsor said i should get something to eat. so i did. b"h this fast is going fine though. i think there might b makom for a ptur because i know of people who got a ptur to text or call people on shabbos if he feels like he wasn't going to fall. i am not a posek or even close to it so i suggest one ask his LOR.

Shlomo that sounded to me a little like the guy that said a Rabbi gave allowance to masturbate HERE
I think we should leave that out of the forum
Sorry if you think I'm being too F(o)RUM

Thank you everyone for the insight about fasting. B"H the fast is over, however, I could see how fasting can make someone vulnerable to fall, as I see with myself (I hate fasting days). However I would have to consult a rabbi before I break the fast. In addition to that, breaking a fast (besides for on Yom Kipur) is not the same as Chilul Shabbos. It is far more easier to get a Heter to break a fast.

Interesting discussion about fasting. I usually find the opposite to be true. I don't fast well and I end up often feeling miserable and weak. I find that when the physical body is weakened it's easier to feel more spiritual. But that's just me.

BenTorah.BaalHabayis wrote:

I actually hear that. For some a lessened physical state results in an increased spiritual state.

markz wrote:

I don't agree. But it's ok.