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TOPIC: SOBRIETY 10526 Views

SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 03:35 #253797

  • yiraishamaim
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I am so deliriously happy with reaching 180 days!

I remember reading a post a short time ago of a member here who is also a Ba'al Koreh in shul. He said that when he read Shir Hashirim in shul he got quite emotional. I really relate to that. It shows how low we really became with these actions and the stark difference between that and kedusha is major. That sudden realization brings on tears of joy!!!

I used to get so down when I read "VELO SASOOROO ACHAREI LEVASVCHEM VEACHAREI AYNAYCHEM ASHER ATEM ZONIM ACHAREIHEM" - now I beam with pride that I am on the right road. I used to not look at people in the eyes. I thought they probably can see I have P___ eyes. Even though I learned Torah and had weeks or more of stretches when I did not indulge in the forbidden. Now I have no problem looking at people. No insecurity in that regard
I am so much more relaxed. I can multi-task easier. If I have stretches of time alone I do not have a sudden zombie robotic slave-like urge to to something filthy and stupid.
I am thrilled beyond thrilled.

I love and appreciate all participants in the forum. If you love someone you wish them the best.

I WISH YOU SOBRIETY ( Can you think of something better?)

May we all get sober AND STAY THAT WAY so we can be the true YIRAISHAMAIM and AVDEI HASHEM that we were born to be.

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 09:03 #253803

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Thanks for the powerfull H'izuk yiraishamaim, I'm so happy for you that you're on the good road b"H !

Have you got an othe thread ? I was searching for it but didn't find !

Anw thank you and hatslah'a Raba for your day !

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 09:52 #253805

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Thanks for the good wishes.

As for threads sure I do but have not used them for a while - think i will start posting on SOBRIETY now for a bit.

Another day another ray of sunshine:)

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 11:09 #253810

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To answer your question about thread - check out in the testimonials

Topic: Thankful

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 12:36 #253818

Mazel tov on 90x2!!
May you be zocheh to many more!

I'm only starting day 6 but already I'm starting to see glimpses of the freedom you talk about.

Thank you for inspiring us.

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 20:53 #253851

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Thank you yiraishamayim,
Why do I feel so grateful? I think it's because by your efforts you forge the way for us and you even lift us up.
We should all see much hatzlacha.
Shlomo

Re: SOBRIETY 04 May 2015 21:23 #253859

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Amen - I am only in keg in the big forum machine. I am a mere talmid of others whoprecede me here.

Thanks you for the kind words!

Re: SOBRIETY 31 May 2015 22:42 #255728

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yiraishamaim
I am only in keg in the big forum machine. I am a mere talmid of others who precede me here.

You're more then that. You are a link with a transformer built in. You can change people with a nice word, that rings true without sounding mushy. (Maybe I'm sounding mushy now. Oh well )
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)

Re: SOBRIETY 01 Jun 2015 02:59 #255742

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Mazel tov on your successes! May you go from strength to strength or from surrender to surrender as the case may be!
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: SOBRIETY 01 Jun 2015 21:33 #255792

I am so happy for you. I also have great kinas sofrim for you. I daven that all of us working to get closer to hkb'h get pulled towards him and enjoy his kedusha.

Re: SOBRIETY 02 Jun 2015 00:08 #255810

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Amen.

Thank you

Re: SOBRIETY 02 Jun 2015 12:49 #255832

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It was so many years ago yet I remember it so clearly. I was 18 years old I am now over 50. I decided with a few friends that while we would be in the city that day we would try to sneak into a movie theater known for its "dirty movies" At the time there was no internet. Shmutz and acting out essentially had to do with magazines and movies.

We were "successful" and entered the theater. What I saw startled me. The last 4 to 6 rows were filled and tightly filled with men in their sixties and seventies. They all looked sort of saddened and empty but not necessarily of low income.
The rest of the theater was empty except for us 3 kids. I looked back at these men and thought " do they still have urges like us young guys? Is there nothing else they could do in their golden years? I certainly won't be such a loser at their age. Only now, when I am young and H_____ will I go to such a place. For me going here is sorta normal but these old geysers???"

I have since learned that P____, acting out and the like is not so uncommon for the elderly. It is clear that sexual addiction just does not go away. Young men so inclined become middle-aged men so inclined and eventually turn into elderly men ...

Is there anything more sadder and more reprehensible as a dirty old man?

Conversely, the person who works on himself with a proper program of recovery is the polar opposite. He becomes more self-confident as he works his program.
AT THIS POINT- Although continuing his recovery he feels capable of working on other middos. Daven and learn more. His glowing nature becomes conspicuous to others.

"Chochmos Adam Tair Panav" He becomes a dignified person with a happy disposition.


Hachaim V'hamaves is really in our hands. If we have the desire and put forth the right

hishtadlus, G-d will take care of the rest.

Re: SOBRIETY 02 Jun 2015 13:02 #255833

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Wow! I also recall how as a teen I went from masturbation straight into looking at porn, reading porn mags, etc and then watching porn films in the old shmutzy midtown NYC. I agree completely-once you work on yourself with regard to the addiction, you can then proceed to work on other midos. It starts with confronting the addiction, and developing a strategy and tactics on how to deal with the addiction on a 24/7 basis. Once you have a strategy in place, you simply must have to adhere to it on a daily basis ala davening three times a day or learning a Daf Yomi. There simply is no substitute.

Re: SOBRIETY 02 Jun 2015 17:26 #255853

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I had a few slips yesterday. I am attributing that to the fact that at this point I must not only be steadfast to my current strategies but also up the ante a little.

A Little more learning etc.It's time for that.

It's a bit tricky. Although one should not move too fast, one can't rest on one's laurels either.

"Lo alecha hamelacha ligmor, ve'loh atah ben chorin lehibatel me'menah"

Re: SOBRIETY 02 Jun 2015 20:17 #255870

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I had a few slips yesterday. I am attributing that to the fact that at this point I must not only be steadfast to my current strategies but also up the ante a little.

A Little more learning etc. It's time for that.


I think your up to level 3 or something. I heard the game gets harder as you finish each level. If only we could see our score, it would make it so much easier. But I guess then the game wouldn't be so challenging.


"Lo alecha hamelacha ligmor, ve'loh atah ben chorin lehibatel me'menah"

100%!!!!! That's the meaning of "one day at a time"! We just need to start. Who cares about the end. It might end tonight, or in 100 years. Who knows. How can we possibly plan to finish something if we don't know when we ourselves are being finished. We only need to start, Every day.
BIG SHOT!
Free Choice?!
Yirai's Memories
STORY TIME :)

Dr. Seuss - You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who'll decide where to go.

FSKOT! (Fell Shmell--Keep on Trucking) (The Rebba R' Bards)
Last Edit: 02 Jun 2015 20:19 by stillgoing.
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