The Library

The biggest obstacle to succeeding is not believing you can succeed. The first impediment to overcoming this struggle is not in your genes, your childhood or your environment. If you believe you can succeed and are willing to make the effort, you will find the way out.  Absolutely NOTHING stands in the way of a true RATZON.

"Struggling&StrivingBT" writes: So, like all, becoming a Bal Teshuvah has by no means been easy, and I'm by no means there yet. One of the hardest parts has been in the area of "self gratification". While intellectually, I understand what is so bad about wasting seed,...

Day 33 coming up. I have so far steered completely away from p__ & m__. Thankfully, lust is not an issue and I haven't entertained it with my eyes or mind. All in all it's been a very useful experience. My hope is that things progress, more and more and more. How incr...

The thoughts are relentless. They give me no rest. Why have I this struggle? Why have I this test?A master blueprint, a master plan.So far beyond the thoughts of man.For this I am here, and I will do it well.Never mind heaven, and never mind hell.Alone I am helpless, this...

If we find that we keep falling into inappropriate behaviors that go against our conscience and better judgment, and we have tried countless times to stop in the past but always seem to fall back to them in the end, then we are probably struggling with an addiction.

By nature, we go to what feels good and try to avoid pain.  Pleasure and suffering are both part of life. But we get to choose which pleasures we want and which suffering we want.

Nothing worthwhile comes without hard work.  One of the greatest obstacles stopping a person from changing is the notion that it can be done without a lot of investment.  We tend to forget that our whole purpose on this world is to grow and improve.

The Yetzer Hara's job and goal is to cause us damage, and to do this he was given permission to use pleasure and "Sipuk" (fulfillment) as a bluff to be able to harm us. But we must understand that his seductions are like a terrorist offering us a piece of cake to ensnare us.

GuardYourEyes uses a unique approach to help people, by recognizing that there are many different levels in the struggle for “Shmiras Ainayim” and “Shmiras Habris”. Use the “Nutshell” to find what level you identify with most, and what recommendations would be most appropriate for your level.

We are unlikely to succeed if we try to fight the Yetzer Hara head on.  Just like terrorists are often successful because they don’t try to fight a big army head on, we must also learn to apply guerilla warfare and pre-empt the Yetzer Hara.

My appreciation for your amazing contribution to klal Yisrael and really for saving my life! For the first time in my life I went through the yomim noraim with a feeling that I really did teshuva and that there is a really good chance that this year it will last. May all your endeavors be blessed!

This struggle is the fertile soil that our “true” selves will grow out of. And through it, we learn how to give our hearts over to Hashem. And hopefully we will be able to look back one day and say that it was all worth it.

We have often discovered that we were trying to fight only the Yetzer Hara, rather than building and changing ourselves. For true long term success, we must learn to fight the cause of the bad behaviors and not just the symptoms.

Everyone has these fantasies. Some people more, some people less. We are human beings and not angels.  If it bothers you that you struggle with these thoughts, that is already something to be proud of.  The moment we start to look at ourselves in a positive light, we will see that the fantasies will come much less often.

Even if we started to slip, we can achieve the greatest levels of Kedusha by stopping ourselves from sliding further.

The first key to recovery is “acceptance.” We need to accept that we have a problem and that we need help. Otherwise, we will read through the Guard Your Eyes website and Handbook and say: “they aren’t talking about me.”

Having the proper perspective and attitude on this struggle can make all the difference. Often people write to us saying that had they only known the proper perspective and attitude guidelines that we discuss on our network when they were younger, they would have never fallen into the addiction in the first place!

We must believe that coin after coin are added to our “spiritual bank” every time we say “no” to the Yetzer Hara, no matter how insignificant it may seem to us at the time.