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What spouses of addicts need to know

By obormottel
I would like to share an important point with wives of men who struggle: Your husband is not acting out because of you. He is not doing it to spite you. He is not doing it because he misses something which he thought he could have gotten from you. He is doing it be...
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The Wife’s Story

By the.guard
We were married nine years ago. I had my misgivings from the beginning- his parents didn’t have a good marriage- but besides for that, my husband was loving, caring and devoted- I never would have believed what would come to be. After we agreed to move to my hometown, m...
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SSA Conference Call at a BRAND NEW TIME!

By obormottel
Hey Everyone! I am happy to announce that this coming Sunday June 18, from 10:45-11:30 am EST* a new cycle for the SSA (same-sex attractions) conference call will begin! If you struggle with SSA please join us, especially if you have never attended these calls before. If...
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A letter to the wife of the GYE husband

By the.guard
Before I begin, I reiterate that this letter is written by a Yid - little mr. yechida here. Your husband did not know I would write this and certainly didn't ask me to. It's important that you keep this in mind as you read this letter. An important disclaimer: every life ...
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Porn is not a "guy" issue

By obormottel
I struggle. I am not the only woman who does. Maybe you do, maybe you know someone that does. I was convinced that I was the only one. I thought I stood alone and that sucked. I was so ashamed of myself and I felt like I was hiding all of the time. The struggle is real,...
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Marriage Tips in Infographics

By obormottel
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Abused, Addicted & Hate Sex with My Husband. What now?

By obormottel
Miri writes: Hi. Your organization seems to be wonderful and helpful to many people. Hashem should pay you all back thousand-fold!!! I am not sure if you can help me with this but I'm a bit stuck and not sure where to turn right now. I had a sexual experience when I was...
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Women in recovery: complete change

By obormottel
Yesterday, while I was on Youtube, I noticed a feature that hadn't struck me before. Every video that you've ever viewed is underlined in red. I was so completely shocked to see how much time I had wasted. I felt like I was wasting my life away and the darkness started ...
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Are women safe in a sexual recovery group?

By obormottel
Dov Responds: One of the safer places for a female sexaholic is a sexaholics meeting because the men there are known entities - they are all essentially wearing a sign over their heads that says to the female member, "Hi. I'm a womanizer/stalker/worshiper of people like y...
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Does Boy-Craziness Stop After Marriage?

By obormottel
“Do thoughts about other boys/crushes disappear when you are married?” More than one boy-crazy girl has asked me this question. In other words, “Will marriage cure my boy-craziness?” Since I’ve been asked similar versions of this question more than once now, I thought I’d...
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Compulsive Sexual Behavior Breakdown: Audio Lecture

By obormottel
The Goals of this presentation are: For Educators to be able to- 1) Differentiate compulsive behavior (serious) suggesting professional intervention from a subclinical (not as serious) issue 2) Identify a great variety of behaviors in which this problem can appear or man...
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Have I done enough?!

By obormottel
Esti was living the ideal life. A successful husband. A beautiful home. Relatively happy kids. Good health. And she was dedicated to her role as a loyal wife. It was late at night when Esti called me. I could quickly hear in her voice that she was in a state of sh...
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I'm 15. Why can't I hang out with girls?

By obormottel
Hi. I'm 15 years old and I care about Hashem a lot, but why should I stop hanging out with girls? GYE Answered: Please see page 15-16 of this booklet called "Dear Bochur". It would be better if you read from page 9 already, to understand more about the issue. And if y...
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Giving it up to G-d

By obormottel
I'm a wife of a sexaholic. The difficulty of being married to an addict is not only the acting out behavior. It also very much includes their demeanor. The demeanor I'm talking about shows itself in the addict’s inability to have a healthy relationship, his mean-spirite...
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Discussion with 14 Year Old Boy

By the.guard
A 14 year old boy wrote: So I started doing the TaPHSiC Method, and I ended up falling, so now I have to tell someone about the problem. I'm thinking either my dad or my Rav. What I wanted to know is how to do it. I'm sure they'd both be understanding, but I'm still not s...
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I was Losing My Husband

By the.guard
An email we received from a wife, Jan 1, 2016: My husband is in a leadership position in our community. We are currently married 20+ years. The "perfect" couple, totally "in love." In year 16, i caught him with porn. He confessed, wanted to get out, but didn’t know how...
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Denial and Sex Addiction

By obormottel
Denial is a form of distorted thinking. In fact, it is a masterpiece of distorted thinking. Breaking through denial marks the beginning of addiction treatment. This is just as true for sexual addiction and behavioral addictions generally as it is for chemical dependency...
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You are Special

By obormottel
I want to share something in the name of a Rabbi that my friend spoke to. I found this very inspiring: A person has two basic and opposite pulls inside of him/her: 1) Taava = wants/desire 2) Hakara = recognizing and getting close to HaShem. The Rabbi explained that Taav...
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