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filter.. or maybe not
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: filter.. or maybe not 786 Views

filter.. or maybe not 08 Sep 2019 10:40 #343424

  • jack123
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OK, so im on one of my longest streaks in a long long time, and im bh still going strong. there was one thing I changed this time which helped me tremendously, and that is ..no internet filter.
every time I tried stopping I would put some sort of block or filter and than I would always find a situation where there was no block from accessing stuff, either a different place or device or removing it myself when possible.
 I realized that what was happening ,was, that as soon as it was blocked I would let my inclinations run loose, bc I anyway couldn't do anything, and I be skyhigh with tayvah and ultimately would fall in one way or another
wheras now I left everything open and have to be on my toes the whole time. im forced to control myself 24 7, and once you've mastered self control, there is no loopholes.
so maybe filters aren't for everyone
so far so good ill keep updatingon my progress 
want to hear everyones opinion

Re: filter.. or maybe not 08 Sep 2019 18:10 #343432

  • Markz
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jack123 wrote on 08 Sep 2019 10:40:
every time I tried stopping I would put some sort of block or filter

Ok, you and I are in the same boat!

The block or filter for me was because I was trying to stop.

Until I discovered, that that’s actually not primarily what a filter is for... 
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Re: filter.. or maybe not 08 Sep 2019 19:17 #343434

  • Gevura Shebyesod
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I got my drivers license, so now I don’t need the guardrail at the edge of the cliff...
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל

And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can
And every day that you want to wake up, that you want to wake, you can
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah
I'll help you see it through...

My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: filter.. or maybe not 08 Sep 2019 19:30 #343436

  • Markz
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Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 08 Sep 2019 19:17:
I got my drivers license, so now I don’t need the guardrail at the edge of the cliff...

Ok. But i said “We’re in the same boat”
That’s what happens when you get rid of the guardrail...

But if you drive a Monstah Truck why not just get rid of the entire cliff for all of us??
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Re: filter.. or maybe not 08 Sep 2019 19:31 #343437

  • sleepy
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jack123 wrote on 08 Sep 2019 10:40:
OK, so im on one of my longest streaks in a long long time, and im bh still going strong. there was one thing I changed this time which helped me tremendously, and that is ..no internet filter.
every time I tried stopping I would put some sort of block or filter and than I would always find a situation where there was no block from accessing stuff, either a different place or device or removing it myself when possible.
 I realized that what was happening ,was, that as soon as it was blocked I would let my inclinations run loose, bc I anyway couldn't do anything, and I be skyhigh with tayvah and ultimately would fall in one way or another
wheras now I left everything open and have to be on my toes the whole time. im forced to control myself 24 7, and once you've mastered self control, there is no loopholes.
so maybe filters aren't for everyone
so far so good ill keep updatingon my progress 
want to hear everyones opinion

i assume there is no wife or kids that can access the unfiltered phone/computer?
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post

Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 03:04 #343442

  • Hashem Help Me
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You are not the first, and presumably not the last, individual on the site that has found the filter to be "ipcha mistavra". However it is rare. For most people, a strong filter removes the nisayon when the urge strikes, and also protects all other members of the house. Being that rabbonim of all branches of Orthodoxy have all urged filters, it would probably be wise for anyone finding themselves in this situation to speak with their rav.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

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Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 05:50 #343445

  • jack123
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i assume there is no wife or kids that can access the unfiltered phone/computer?
that's right, without going into technicalities its not a michshol for others.
thanks for being meorer.

Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 05:54 #343446

  • jack123
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Hashem Help Me wrote on 09 Sep 2019 03:04:
You are not the first, and presumably not the last, individual on the site that has found the filter to be "ipcha mistavra". However it is rare. For most people, a strong filter removes the nisayon when the urge strikes, and also protects all other members of the house. Being that rabbonim of all branches of Orthodoxy have all urged filters, it would probably be wise for anyone finding themselves in this situation to speak with their rav.

thanks, it helps to know that others feel the same. btw the rabbonim are talking preventively and for that a filter is necessary whereas here its 'leachar maaseh'...

Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 10:58 #343447

  • Gevura Shebyesod
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Markz wrote on 08 Sep 2019 19:30:

Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 08 Sep 2019 19:17:
I got my drivers license, so now I don’t need the guardrail at the edge of the cliff...

Ok. But i said “We’re in the same boat”
That’s what happens when you get rid of the guardrail...

But if you drive a Monstah Truck why not just get rid of the entire cliff for all of us??

And if your boat doesn’t have a railing you might slip and end up in the water. But hey, you have a big boat. So just drain the ocean. 
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל

And every day that you want to waste, that you want to waste, you can
And every day that you want to wake up, that you want to wake, you can
And every day that you want to change, that you want to change, yeah
I'll help you see it through...

My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 15:28 #343459

  • lionking
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I tried draining the ocean of filth, but then I read a statistic, that each second, video sites get uploaded with enough content to view in a lifetime. I sure hope I have better things to do with my life.

I can identify with Jack well, as I have experienced the same thing. However I think Markz and GS expressed it well. I was viewing filters wrong. Filters aren't self driving cars, they are guardrails. If someone is hitting the guardrails too often, it's a sign he needs a refresher driving course.

Hatzlocha
My email address is: growinghigher613@gmail.com

Re: filter.. or maybe not 09 Sep 2019 15:37 #343460

  • Dave M
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Agree.  The best filters are the one that you don't try to breach. 

Re: filter.. or maybe not 10 Sep 2019 01:26 #343466

  • sleepy
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jack123 wrote on 08 Sep 2019 10:40:
OK, so im on one of my longest streaks in a long long time, and im bh still going strong. there was one thing I changed this time which helped me tremendously, and that is ..no internet filter.
every time I tried stopping I would put some sort of block or filter and than I would always find a situation where there was no block from accessing stuff, either a different place or device or removing it myself when possible.
 I realized that what was happening ,was, that as soon as it was blocked I would let my inclinations run loose, bc I anyway couldn't do anything, and I be skyhigh with tayvah and ultimately would fall in one way or another
wheras now I left everything open and have to be on my toes the whole time. im forced to control myself 24 7, and once you've mastered self control, there is no loopholes.
so maybe filters aren't for everyone
so far so good ill keep updatingon my progress 
want to hear everyones opinion

the question is ,does it work because
1. you have to be on guard
or does it work
2. because now you have pas bisalo?
if number 2. is your answer , what will prevent you when you feel a need to make hamotzie?
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post

Re: filter.. or maybe not 10 Sep 2019 01:46 #343469

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Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 08 Sep 2019 19:17:
I got my drivers license, so now I don’t need the guardrail at the edge of the cliff...

i think  guardrails are for everyone ,especialy by cliffs, after all everyone gets sleepy once in a while...
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post

Re: filter.. or maybe not 10 Sep 2019 05:46 #343474

  • jack123
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the question is ,does it work because

1. you have to be on guard

or does it work

2. because now you have pas bisalo?

if number 2. is your answer , what will prevent you when you feel a need to make hamotzie?
good point, but pas besalo is said by amoroim who weren't neck deep in this stuff so that was enough for them, no way that that is gonna help. the reasoning is that im forced to work on self control, which makes the first stretch terribly hard but gradually gets easier

Re: filter.. or maybe not 10 Sep 2019 22:40 #343492

  • stillgoing
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Dave M wrote on 09 Sep 2019 15:37:
Agree.  The best filters are the one that you don't try to breach. 

Great post!!
thank you.
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