Old Timer wrote on 31 Dec 2017 08:06:
...Walking into the room with my head held low, feeling like and a jerk.
...Everyone around me is jeering and laughing at the ideal i believe in, perceiving me as a 'newbie' who lacks step one.
...I am back, not because of a \n Addiction. Psychologists have evaluated my scenario, and i am NOT ADDICTED TO LUST. I do however "struggle" to keep my lust in check, and this great website and program of recovery worked for me in the past.
To be honest, totally honest. My filter settings is currently Rimon at its weakest, i have a twitter account just for shmutz, a tumblr acount just as a loophole for PORN, i have waste most of my day on youtube just trying to stay distracted, and i am masturbating to porn once every day or two. That's the truth.
To be honest, i am not willing to start any relationship with a woman, because of the HUGE issurim involved in everything from mesaper ima machoreiu hageder, to actual physical contact, to outright sex with a nidah heshem yiracheim!! 0n the other hand, i have done so much masturbation and porn, that it has long ago been NAASEH KHETER, despote LONG periods of sobriety, it is just probably a lifelong NAASEH KEHETER. damn!!!!
please respond freely, and let me get in touch with reality!! My acquired defence mechanism of running away from reality to an imaginary world IS WASTING MY LIFE AWAY!!
No one laughing at you
You sound sick - very
When someone is unwell they need stamina to go to the right Dr.
Many of us do not gain with the forum, it's like going to a lightweight ENT for a serious Heart condition
May you see the light and have the strength to move towards it