Welcome, Guest

Dirty Jokes - See 1st Post
(0 viewing) 
Getting out of Isolation and connecting with others is an important part of recovery. This board is for non-addiction related threads, where members exchange jokes, have fun - and drink Lechayim Together!

TOPIC: Dirty Jokes - See 1st Post 37308 Views

Dirty Jokes - See 1st Post 01 Nov 2015 13:54 #267452

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
Enter at your own risk


Invitees as of Nov 1 2015
AlexEliezer, Bigmoish, Cordnoy, Gevura Shebyesod, gibbor120, theGuard or any similar sounding name, Shlomo24, 9494, PA (the mexican), Serenity, ZemirosShabbos

If I missed anyone or for reservations please PM me, also read the next post
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 20 Jun 2016 23:54 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 13:55 #267453

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
cordnoy wrote:

gibbor120 wrote:
UAJ, I can't figure out if you are joking or not.


I sure hope he was jokin' (although it belongs in the 'dirty jokes' section - Markz, do we have one?), for it borders on the absurd.


Cordnoy when you're back in custody - you'll be placed in a different cell with new reading material, and also this new post you've been assigned to

As the founding member of this "dirty jokes" post I will be monitoring that this post doesn't get out of hand, cos if you do we have these ready for you

handcuffs.gif
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 09 Apr 2019 11:26 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 14:04 #267454

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
I want to explain Cord's humor to those that don't get it (myself included)

Someone like Cord' that life is unmanageable with lust, has a lust pillow stuffed in front of his face, and therefore his jokes are based on that perception. That is his reality, and he's using all the great tools at his disposal to deal with his reality, and assists many others too

Many of us (myself included) when hearing a joke from Cord' are shocked, b/c he's evoking our imagination to something we didn't even consider, and is therefore triggering to us.

That is no excuse to ban his humor from this forum, just as we don't ban posts that are WAY more triggering
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 01 Nov 2015 14:08 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 14:41 #267459

  • gevura shebyesod
  • Current streak: 1248 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4178
  • Karma: 505
I'm not sure what being included in this exalted group is supposed to say about us...

But anyway here's a dirty joke:
A boy fell into the mud..
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 15:05 #267462

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
9494 wrote:
I am going to say a joke here - I sincerely hope that I am not thrown off for it. If it is "too much" the moderators may gladly remove it:

What did the one blonde say to the other blonde ?

:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!


THE MODERATOR HAS NOT YET RETURNED, CHAP AREIN WHILE THE GOINGS GOOD

Attachment animated-police-cherries-lit-up-flashing-lights.gif not found



Attachment escapedconvict.jpg not found



Cordnoy Dissapeared!!!!!! As he announced 4 days ago at his forum post Tryin'


You can reach him at thenewme613@hotmail.com
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 01 Nov 2015 15:06 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 17:18 #267464

  • peloni almoni
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • אשר אנכי מצוך היום - there is only today
  • Posts: 636
  • Karma: 47
you guys better man up quick and come up with some good dirty material, because we all know that if you leave it to me to step over the red line first, it won't end well. especially since serenity is not invited.
Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
peloni_almoni@hotmail.com

None of us has it all together, but together, we have it all.

we always put our sobriety before our ego -
מוטב שאקרא שוטה כל ימי ואל אהיה רשע שעה אחת לפני המקום

לפעולות אדם בדבר שפתיך אני שמרתי אורחות פריץ. תמוך אשורי במעגלותיך בל נמוטו פעמי. תהלים יז
__________________________________________________________
LINKS:
- SOLUTIONS: WHERE DO I FIT IN TO GYE
- DOWNLOAD GYE HANDBOOK & READ AT LEAST TWICE
- OVERDOSE OF DOV: READING MATERIAL TO KEEP ME SANE
- THE BEST THREAD ON THE FORUM; READ, POST, AND HAVE A GREAT TIME
 

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 18:23 #267465

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
Mr PA
There's a reason I said Mexican, stick to those jokes and we may be safe, unless you're a drug lord... For now well assume you're a חפץ חשוד, so no handcuffs.... .... Yet

What's the red line you're talking about?
It was blue the last time you posted it
P.Authority wrote:

hasid2.jpg
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 19:50 #267477

  • peloni almoni
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • אשר אנכי מצוך היום - there is only today
  • Posts: 636
  • Karma: 47
this is too good. it deserves a place on your blog also:

tumblr_m3ez9706ys1r7bx4no1_500.jpg


what do you call a marxist who is addicted to the internet?
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
peloni_almoni@hotmail.com

None of us has it all together, but together, we have it all.

we always put our sobriety before our ego -
מוטב שאקרא שוטה כל ימי ואל אהיה רשע שעה אחת לפני המקום

לפעולות אדם בדבר שפתיך אני שמרתי אורחות פריץ. תמוך אשורי במעגלותיך בל נמוטו פעמי. תהלים יז
__________________________________________________________
LINKS:
- SOLUTIONS: WHERE DO I FIT IN TO GYE
- DOWNLOAD GYE HANDBOOK & READ AT LEAST TWICE
- OVERDOSE OF DOV: READING MATERIAL TO KEEP ME SANE
- THE BEST THREAD ON THE FORUM; READ, POST, AND HAVE A GREAT TIME
 
Last Edit: 01 Nov 2015 19:51 by peloni almoni.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 01 Nov 2015 20:04 #267482

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
Sorry Abbas poster, I wasn't invited to post on this post, post my triggering of ...

I had THE perfect dirty joke as a reply , but i don't have enough karma's to take the risk. Ill leave it to your imagination

Abbas wrote:
what do you call a marxist who is addicted to the internet?
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!


You got it all wrong
INTERNET IS FORBIDDEN in my country

:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 01 Nov 2015 20:15 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 02 Nov 2015 01:26 #267513

  • peloni almoni
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • אשר אנכי מצוך היום - there is only today
  • Posts: 636
  • Karma: 47
anonymous uninvited poster with not enough karma's wrote:

I had THE perfect dirty joke as a reply , but i don't have enough karma's to take the risk. Ill leave it to your imagination


oh you animal!
Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
peloni_almoni@hotmail.com

None of us has it all together, but together, we have it all.

we always put our sobriety before our ego -
מוטב שאקרא שוטה כל ימי ואל אהיה רשע שעה אחת לפני המקום

לפעולות אדם בדבר שפתיך אני שמרתי אורחות פריץ. תמוך אשורי במעגלותיך בל נמוטו פעמי. תהלים יז
__________________________________________________________
LINKS:
- SOLUTIONS: WHERE DO I FIT IN TO GYE
- DOWNLOAD GYE HANDBOOK & READ AT LEAST TWICE
- OVERDOSE OF DOV: READING MATERIAL TO KEEP ME SANE
- THE BEST THREAD ON THE FORUM; READ, POST, AND HAVE A GREAT TIME
 
Last Edit: 02 Nov 2015 01:26 by peloni almoni.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 04 Nov 2015 19:37 #267775

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
Shlomo24 wrote:
not maskim at all. if god made the internet available then it must be a good thing. this convo is a moot point. (or a moo point according to joey tribbiani)

Gd made Las Vegas available - All Trucks ready set go!!!
lasvegasbillboardtruck.jpg
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story

Re: Dirty Jokes - by invitation only (see first post) 05 Nov 2015 00:46 #267824

  • shlomo24
  • Current streak: 1 day
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 2213
  • Karma: 135
ummm, there's a nice size jewish community in las vegas.
If you're an LGBTQ or LGBTQ-questioning person and looking for someone who can understand you, feel free to reach out. I promise no judgement and to try and listen the best I can. 

Email: iam24zman@gmail.com

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 05 Nov 2015 00:52 #267826

  • peloni almoni
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • אשר אנכי מצוך היום - there is only today
  • Posts: 636
  • Karma: 47
markz wrote:
Shlomo24 wrote:
not maskim at all. if god made the internet available then it must be a good thing. this convo is a moot point. (or a moo point according to joey tribbiani)

Gd made Las Vegas available - All Trucks ready set go!!!
lasvegasbillboardtruck.jpg


this is where this belongs, not on a serious thread.
Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
peloni_almoni@hotmail.com

None of us has it all together, but together, we have it all.

we always put our sobriety before our ego -
מוטב שאקרא שוטה כל ימי ואל אהיה רשע שעה אחת לפני המקום

לפעולות אדם בדבר שפתיך אני שמרתי אורחות פריץ. תמוך אשורי במעגלותיך בל נמוטו פעמי. תהלים יז
__________________________________________________________
LINKS:
- SOLUTIONS: WHERE DO I FIT IN TO GYE
- DOWNLOAD GYE HANDBOOK & READ AT LEAST TWICE
- OVERDOSE OF DOV: READING MATERIAL TO KEEP ME SANE
- THE BEST THREAD ON THE FORUM; READ, POST, AND HAVE A GREAT TIME
 

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 05 Nov 2015 01:02 #267833

  • Markz
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 8259
  • Karma: 428
peloni almoni wrote:
markz wrote:
Shlomo24 wrote:
not maskim at all. if god made the internet available then it must be a good thing. this convo is a moot point. (or a moo point according to joey tribbiani)

Gd made Las Vegas available - All Trucks ready set go!!!
lasvegasbillboardtruck.jpg


this is where this belongs, not on a serious thread.

In the Mabul fish weren't punished for illicit relationships
This is why there's no stupid fish sitting on top of that black Vegas truck.
I wonder. Is the fish inside the truck??
My Story---------Dov Quotes




FREE LUST TRUCK TOWING
Click HERE to checkout;
100 Day Success Stories: cordnoy, Dov, Gevura and more...
• Awesome Threads Saved for You
• Cast Your Vote

GYE Plenty Solutions
➣ The Mark of Torah - Lust Chizuk

➣ Nice Trucking Story
Last Edit: 05 Nov 2015 12:41 by Markz.

Re: Dirty Jokes - By Invitation Only (see first post) 05 Nov 2015 03:51 #267848

  • peloni almoni
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • אשר אנכי מצוך היום - there is only today
  • Posts: 636
  • Karma: 47
"mr. markz"
In the Mabul fish weren't punished for illicit relationships
This is why there's no stupid fish sitting on top of that black Vegas truck.
I wonder. Is the fish inside the truck??
Yo Mr clean come here right now and slap Rabbi Mark


speaking of fish ...
karl_628f53_2232127.jpg
Have a corny day ... and if you do have other plans, change 'em!!
peloni_almoni@hotmail.com

None of us has it all together, but together, we have it all.

we always put our sobriety before our ego -
מוטב שאקרא שוטה כל ימי ואל אהיה רשע שעה אחת לפני המקום

לפעולות אדם בדבר שפתיך אני שמרתי אורחות פריץ. תמוך אשורי במעגלותיך בל נמוטו פעמי. תהלים יז
__________________________________________________________
LINKS:
- SOLUTIONS: WHERE DO I FIT IN TO GYE
- DOWNLOAD GYE HANDBOOK & READ AT LEAST TWICE
- OVERDOSE OF DOV: READING MATERIAL TO KEEP ME SANE
- THE BEST THREAD ON THE FORUM; READ, POST, AND HAVE A GREAT TIME
 
Last Edit: 05 Nov 2015 03:54 by peloni almoni. Reason: hi "mom"
Time to create page: 1.16 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes