thanks for the welcome

lionking wrote on 03 Feb 2021 05:02:

Ok fine. Thanks man, this ones for the King!

Honestly, thanks for this. Cuz idk, I got tons of taiva, which was my fault cuz I fed the Yetzer today a shtikl

Klan wrote on 03 Feb 2021 05:11:

Welcome to the family!
Im honored that your first post was on my thread, though I dont think it came out...

Maybe start your own thread and share with us your journey? It’s very impressive that you’ve made it so far

Hope this doesn’t trigger anyone. If it does, PLEASE! Let me know and I’ll delete this post.

 Gazing into the eyes of a picture of a girl, I feel like I’m experiencing the ultimate Tov. That this is the sweetest thing in the world. This woman is absolutely everything. And I want to become one with her...

What is so insane is that b’emes its Sheker. The chidush of Bechira is that HaShem allows Sheker to seem like Tov...

Just a thought. I was Nichshal in this today.
I’m Magdir a “fall” as Masterbating/watching vids.
This was a slip, not good, and definitely something I must get better at, but that’s for another post.

Its crazy, gazing into her eyes as if we are intimately connected, when really it’s all false.
Idk guys, this stuff is just pure insanity

Struggling.
Ill go to sleep.
Uch.
Gn.

From your posts it sounds like you are desperately thirsting for a relationship. As painful as this sounds, realize that you can't fill that need with a pretend "make believe" relationship. The days of fantasy friends filling the assumed hole in your heart ended by 3rd grade age the latest. If you recognize yourself as having missed out on healthy relationships as a child, it may be worthwhile to read the book "Running on Empty" written by a gentle psychologist about people that grew up without appropriate nurturing. (I am sure there are many such books by other authors too). Many well meaning yiddishe parents, due to our community's perfectionist tendencies, without realizing it, steer their kids in this direction. 



Staring into the eyes of some girl's picture will never give you real warmth, love, intimacy, support, or any other real emotion you are desperate to experience. Iyh when you get married, you will invest energy in developing a healthy (not needy - and that's a subject for another post) relationship with a spouse. You will iyh find that a real hug fills an emotional thirst, not a sexual one. Fantasizing, and using your penis as a pacifier (sorry for the blunt language - but you have to face the facts) will never fill that need. Thousands of hours of watching the most intense pornography with continuous acting out (rach"l!!) will never satisfy this need in the slightest. It is like trying to fill up a deep pit with cotton candy. There is an illusion that the pit is full - until one jumps in and breaks all his bones.



Until you get married invest in wholesome and healthy (again not needy!) relationships with parents siblings and friends to the best of your ability. Give and give and give to them what you determine they need and they will iyh reciprocate. There should be absolutely no sexual undertones in these relationships. (Not like me - when I went through a tough time, I had erections every time a rebbi would give me a hug - man, what I went through with none of this GYE help....)



Yitzchok Avinu had a nechama for the loss of his mother when he got married. The Torah is showing us that certain relationships are not able to be replicated. There is no replacement for a certain kind of warmth. But he still remained Yitzchok Avinu during that interim time.



You will iyh get what you are looking for in the right time. Meanwhile stay the inspirational Yeshiva Guy that we all find so inspiring. L'maan Hashem, stop trying to feed your hungry soul with fake, cotton candy like, images and fantasies. And iyh if we ever meet I will give you a (healthy) hug.

YeshivaGuy ur an inspiration to all of us dont let us down keep it up!

lionking wrote on 03 Feb 2021 05:02:

How was your night?
I'm BH doing Ok. 
Thanks so much!

YeshivaGuy wrote on 03 Feb 2021 06:00:

Why is wanting a DMC (deep meaningful connection) insanity?

Its sooooo normal. Here we go again. Get off your stupid high horse and realize that you’re NORMAL
 

btw If I’d be stuck at home doing nothing, I’d probably be YouTubing faster than you’re SnowTubing, so you’re doing great.

Question is how to get the “Guy” back to “Yeshiva” 

The "don't let us down" chorus can be counterproductive, it adds on  unhealthy stress. Yeshiva Guy will keep strong with hashem's help because he wants to, and not because of cheerleading. It may help in the short term, but it also drives up the white knuckling several notches.

lionking wrote on 03 Feb 2021 05:02:

Time to play Devils Advocate 

And if YG fails, you get a free pass? 

mggsbms wrote on 03 Feb 2021 15:52:

Thanks buddy. I wasn’t gonna say that myself

lionking wrote on 03 Feb 2021 12:58:

It was bad, not horrible but not good...
Glad ur doin well

Dearest MGG,

My understanding is that YG needs BOTH types of posts:

1) "Cheerleading/fraternity/fuzzy/feel-good" posts
2) Macho "You got this under control" comments


HHM,
Your post is unbelievable.
​I would add that even sex with one's wife is pure cotton candy until it is preceded by intimacy. (You taught me that : )

With love from Grodno ~ IMG

Markz wrote on 03 Feb 2021 16:18:

Thanks for being my advocate. (Am I the Devil???)

Do you want I should pay you with all the free passes I collected over the years?

There was always some reason why I "deserved" a free pass.

But that free pass will get me nowhere in life.

p.s. It was intended to be a motivational tool to help us both out last night.