Hi,

I have been an addict for about 15 years. I've been in SA on and off for a couple years but have been out of it for most of this past year. I'd be interested to find someone with similar struggles as mine, I have a history of abuse which directly affected who I am today. 
Anyway, thanks for reading.

Welcome. You're in the right place.

First of all please take time to read through the GYE handbook.  No two people are the same, everyone has a slightly different set of circumstances, but we all share this problem and since we share the problem we can share the solution too. The book is written in a general way so it can apply to everyone. I found it helpful to really think about what the book was saying and how it applied to me and my own life.

This is a very common problem nowadays, you're far from the only one to deal with it. The word addict gets thrown around quite a lot, but most people who struggle with this issue are not addicts, just normal people with a normal yetzer hora. Which is good. Some people have come to realise that they really are addicts because their situation got gradually worse and worse despite working on it. When I say worse I mean, in frequency, severity or just feeling worse after every slip. If that is the case we may need more than GYE, which most people find to be therapy or SA or both. But I wouldn't jump to that conclusion about you. Many people have overcome this challenge right here on GYE using the tools in the handbook.

So stick around. Keep posting, keep reading and keep on trucking.

Welcome!  Have you ever gone for therapy?  Why have you been in SA "on and off"?  Did it help at all?  What helped?  What didn't?  What do you think you will find here that is better or different than SA?

Re SA, please don't take this the wrong way, but I was wondering if you completed all 12 steps and how you found them.

Thanks for replying.

Firstly, I'm certain that I am an addict. I've attended a few meetings and went through a couple sponsors. I've been on and off because it didn't help much. Granted, I didn't give it my all and perhaps it could have worked if I'd been more involved, but the reason I kept dropping out was because I just didn't connect or relate to most people I met in SA. To be very concise, I didn't feel like I had so much resentment, which was the focus of the meetings I went to, plus I didn't meet anyone who had the same struggles as me.  That led me to believe that maybe I need therapy first before I can actually commit to SA. I had a couple sessions but then quit because I simply couldn't afford it financially. 

I posted here today because I'm just in a pretty bad place and came her in the spur of the moment.

you came to the right place. there are a bunch of people here with various backgrounds. i'm sure you'll be able to connect with someone

I hope you find what you're looking for

Welcome!

Watson how's the guy gonna find what he's looking for if he's on guard your eyes

esseye4685 wrote on 04 Jan 2017 22:31:

Is it necessary to have to connect/relate to other people in SA? And in what way didn't you? For me, there's this one guy who goes to massage parlours. Sure, I can't relate to that, BH I've never ventured from your vanilla porn/masturbation combo, but I sure as hell can relate to the rush he gets while driving there, walking into the room, etc. Maybe seek out the similarities more and you'll appreciate them.

Keep on trucking!
And welcome. 

resentment? Probably not a very good meeting, then. Don't we say, the fellowship is about the solution not the problem?

Welcome,

I'veI had several sponsees who have stated unequivocally that they had no resentments. Eventually, they filled two sheets worth.

Just sayin'.

B'hatzlachah