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my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 09:52 #297381

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Hi I am 16 I come from a chasidish family when I was 11 my most of my class found out about sex through a boy whose mother had told him at 13 I found out about masturbation and from that day I have not been able to go a day without it I have tried multiple times to stop and after a week I fall right back down to make the matter worse I have bad hand writing so my school suggested that my parents by me a iPad which they did and before they let me have it they took it to TAG but as everyone knows (obviously not my parents) that there is always a way around these things so I was exposed to alot of stuff I should not have been I am just hoping that there is someone out here that can help with my masturbation problam

Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 12:19 #297390

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I was in same boat as you

Stupid school you went to... With that handwriting you could could've become one of the country's top doctors

Is there someone sensible in the school you can talk to about your problem
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 14:17 #297399

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I finished school 5 months ago and at the moment I am having problems finding a yeshivah to go to .....

Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 14:39 #297400

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Wish I could help you

do you have any idea where you're gonna be 10 years from now
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 18:06 #297413

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In terms of what????

Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 18:34 #297414

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us wrote on 06 Nov 2016 09:52:
Hi I am 16 I come from a chasidish family when I was 11 my most of my class found out about sex through a boy whose mother had told him at 13 I found out about masturbation and from that day I have not been able to go a day without it I have tried multiple times to stop and after a week I fall right back down to make the matter worse I have bad hand writing so my school suggested that my parents by me a iPad which they did and before they let me have it they took it to TAG but as everyone knows (obviously not my parents) that there is always a way around these things so I was exposed to alot of stuff I should not have been I am just hoping that there is someone out here that can help with my masturbation problam

my suggestion is to speak to someone real.
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 06 Nov 2016 19:00 #297416

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us wrote:

I finished school 5 months ago and at the moment I am having problems finding a yeshivah to go to .....


I've seen boys your age at the same place in their lives 10 years later

What I meant to say is, masturbation isn't always the big problem. If you'd be in a place that you succeed, with good friends, masturbation may not be such a big issue as it is now

Are you gonna be able to find that on gye virtual website? Unlikely, so the only solution I see is what cordnoy said. 

Please keep us posted and let us know what you find. Many guys come to the forum here to complain, but don't share with us the good news. Please keep us in the loop - your highlights too!!
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 15:42 #297470

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I agree with Cords and Mark. Find someone who has you feel comfortable with and speak to them about it. They'll probably be able to help you much more than we can at this point. I feel for you, when I was 16 I couldn't stop masturbating either.
If you're an LGBTQ or LGBTQ-questioning person and looking for someone who can understand you, feel free to reach out. I promise no judgement and to try and listen the best I can. 

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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 20:05 #297484

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Welcome!  Get help and don't be shy.  Many of us wasted years trying to stop on our own.  In the meantime, we got worse and worse.  I eventually got caught by my wife.  It really doesn't get any easier unless you get help.  The earlier, the better.  Once you get married, the stakes are higher.  Take care of it now while you are young.  Most of us wish we had. 

Feel free to keep posting.  We understand what you are going through.

Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 21:11 #297489

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I cant really agree on that with you as my problem is not porn and once I am married It will be a lot easier to hold back from masterbation as I will have a "outlet" and times when I don't have that "outlet" yes it will be hard but I think I will be able to hold off as I will know that I only have to hold of for lets say a week where if I would try stop now I know have to hold off for a few years which is hard

Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 21:45 #297490

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us wrote on 07 Nov 2016 21:11:

I cant really agree on that with you as my problem is not porn and once I am married It will be a lot easier to hold back from masterbation as I will have a "outlet" and times when I don't have that "outlet" yes it will be hard but I think I will be able to hold off as I will know that I only have to hold of for lets say a week where if I would try stop now I know have to hold off for a few years which is hard


Glad to see that you think you're smarter than gibbor. With that attitude, I'm sure you will get far in your quest.

B'hatzlachah
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 22:00 #297491

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Just curious, if marriage will solve the issue, why don't you start looking for a wife now?
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 22:17 #297492

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As a bochur I was certain that once I was married it would be much easier to stop masturbating.

And it was,
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 22:52 #297497

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us wrote on 07 Nov 2016 21:11:

I cant really agree on that with you as my problem is not porn and once I am married It will be a lot easier to hold back from masterbation as I will have a "outlet" and times when I don't have that "outlet" yes it will be hard but I think I will be able to hold off as I will know that I only have to hold of for lets say a week where if I would try stop now I know have to hold off for a few years which is hard


I have a limitless imagination

It served me well all my teenage years when I wanted to masturbate

It informed me when I was a teenager that marriage would be the redemption pill.

Ive been married a couple of years. When is it supposed to kick in
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Re: my problam (Masterbation) 07 Nov 2016 23:07 #297498

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us wrote on 07 Nov 2016 21:11:

I cant really agree on that with you as my problem is not porn and once I am married It will be a lot easier to hold back from masterbation as I will have a "outlet" and times when I don't have that "outlet" yes it will be hard but I think I will be able to hold off as I will know that I only have to hold of for lets say a week where if I would try stop now I know have to hold off for a few years which is hard


Oh, and by the way (at first I didn't wanna scare you, so I left this out), I have been married many years and the longest I had to wait was a week (don't know when that was), two weeks, four weeks, six weeks, several months and a year or two or three at times. And I don't wish this on anyone. But guess what? Although professionals thought otherwise, all (or certainly the bulk of it) the sufferings was my fault.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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