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TOPIC: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 795 Views

This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 11 Oct 2016 13:47 #296223

  • yomkippur5777
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Hi, 
I can't believe there is a forum like this....I am married and have a kid. I have been addictied to almost tayva in the book. It may have something to do with my ADHD, but every day is a struggle with the Tayvas Nashim. I am 100% sure it has held me back so many times, whether in ruchniyos or goshmiyos. It really stinks, but it is what it is. There is almost no escape. I am a genius in playing into the Y"h games. I can get past any filter and make anything look clean and innocent. I can't afford to do this anymore and I hope I can end it. I recently heard in a shiur thats there is a difference btwn desire and want. The truth is I desire  the tayva, but I dont want it. I want to be great and something else. 

Thats it for now. 

Gmat Chasima Tova to all.

Let's make this the year we can quit or at least cut down significantly the tuma we view.

Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 11 Oct 2016 14:22 #296227

  • teshuvahguy
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Love what you said about desire versus want. I also desire it but don't want it. 

Welcome and hatzlacha!

gmar chatima tova and you should achieve new heights in your fight!

Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 11 Oct 2016 14:50 #296234

  • Markz
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yomkippur5777 wrote on 11 Oct 2016 13:47:
Hi, 
I can't believe there is a forum like this....I am married and have a kid. I have been addictied to almost tayva in the book. It may have something to do with my ADHD, but every day is a struggle with the Tayvas Nashim. I am 100% sure it has held me back so many times, whether in ruchniyos or goshmiyos. It really stinks, but it is what it is. There is almost no escape. I am a genius in playing into the Y"h games. I can get past any filter and make anything look clean and innocent. I can't afford to do this anymore and I hope I can end it. I recently heard in a shiur thats there is a difference btwn desire and want. The truth is I desire  the tayva, but I dont want it. I want to be great and something else. 

Thats it for now. 

Gmat Chasima Tova to all.

Let's make this the year we can quit or at least cut down significantly the tuma we view.

Welcome brother

I can probably get thru filters that you can't. But let's not start any competitions. I don't mind being the loser on this

Theres an old adage on GYE that
Hope
is a 4 letter word

Today is a good day to consider a small step to recovery

I wish you all the best and a G'mar Tov!!
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Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 11 Oct 2016 16:03 #296239

  • serenity
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Believe it . Gmar chasima tovah.  
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 11 Oct 2016 19:39 #296253

  • shlomo24
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Markz wrote on 11 Oct 2016 14:50:

yomkippur5777 wrote on 11 Oct 2016 13:47:
Hi, 
I can't believe there is a forum like this....I am married and have a kid. I have been addictied to almost tayva in the book. It may have something to do with my ADHD, but every day is a struggle with the Tayvas Nashim. I am 100% sure it has held me back so many times, whether in ruchniyos or goshmiyos. It really stinks, but it is what it is. There is almost no escape. I am a genius in playing into the Y"h games. I can get past any filter and make anything look clean and innocent. I can't afford to do this anymore and I hope I can end it. I recently heard in a shiur thats there is a difference btwn desire and want. The truth is I desire  the tayva, but I dont want it. I want to be great and something else. 

Thats it for now. 

Gmat Chasima Tova to all.

Let's make this the year we can quit or at least cut down significantly the tuma we view.

Welcome brother

I can probably get thru filters that you can't. But let's not start any competitions. I don't mind being the loser on this

Theres an old adage on GYE that
Hope
is a 4 letter word

Today is a good day to consider a small step to recovery

I wish you all the best and a G'mar Tov!!

Mark: I like OneRepublic also. (They have the hope line a song of theirs).

YK77: Very articulate. I relate to a lot of what you wrote, especially about wanting it and hating it at the same time.

Hatzlacha Rabah.
If you're an LGBTQ or LGBTQ-questioning person and looking for someone who can understand you, feel free to reach out. I promise no judgement and to try and listen the best I can. 

Email: iam24zman@gmail.com

Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 13 Oct 2016 12:58 #296312

  • yomkippur5777
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Thank you!! 

Good Luck to us all!

Re: This Yom Kippur I hope it will end... 14 Oct 2016 18:38 #296443

  • gibbor120
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Welcome!  Read the handbook.  Keep posting.  Many have been helped here.  You can be too.
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