Hi, I'm almost 40 and I've been addicted to masterbation since I was about 5 years old!I use it as a drug. I must do it before I go to sleep every night no matter what. If I can't do it for whatever reason, i get depressed. I have tried many many times to stop but I just can't. Any ideas out there for me? I'm very open to ideas such as taking it slow to eliminate one night at a time or similar to that. Anyone have any tricks that worked for them? Such as replacing masterbation with something else maybe?

Welcome

I know the drug, very well
Take your time, look around
Checkout the trucking GPS below

All the best!!

ummmm ok

I could share with you what work for me you can find that in the story in my signature.

I didn't mention it because I don't know if it is relevant to you. Check it out if you like

Hatzlacha

Welcome,

We're not so into tricks here.
That is what got us into this mess to begin with.

Look around.

B'hatzlachah

Thats not what I meant. I meant to make it easier to go at least one night wthout it and go from there. Theres no problem with making a nisayon easier with practicle advice. I am hoping this site will be a little practicle not just tell me to stop and thats it.

And, no thats not what got me into this mess. Its a deep, psychological thing from when I was very young and its been a part of my life since. Its a disease like alcoholism for me. I don't really care about the cause. I want to stop.

Anyone have practicle advice for me?

Yes I have advice for tonight - it might work and it might not - click HERE
And when you're done, read one success story in "Free towing assistance"
There will be a farher on it tomorrow - just kiddin' ;-)

I want to just point out
Please take it easy, there's another guy that came on the forums asking for "solutions for tonight" and after many months has not recovered from masturbation.
Why? Because he's looking for quick fixes, and I don't have any experience in such things...

So again, take it easy, it's gonna be good!!!

All the best

Welcome to GYE. I can't fully relate to your particular struggle, as I never experienced the need to masturbate on a nightly basis nor did I have any issue falling asleep without it. But let me ask you, is your need to masturbate related to lust? Do you struggle with pornography too, or is it just the sensation of masturbating on its own that you're addicted to?

I'd add that it might be worth figuring out two things.

1) Do you really want to stop? Not I ought to, or I should, but I want to and am willing to do ?? to accomplish that.

2) WHY do you want to stop? Knowing why can help you connect to your inner will and help you focus on your goal.

Hatzlacha!

There's nothing easy about stopping lust. It may be simple, but not easy. There are no tricks either. If it is a disease like alcoholism then maybe try out SA.

sleliminate wrote:


Welcome to the club. As you see you are not alone here many have come here like you to get some kind of support and help on these issues. most of us had in mind a specific kind of fix and/or recovery. But with time we got to learn WHAT WORKS FOR ME. WE READ MANY THREADS UNTILL WE FIND A SOLUTION THAT CAN HELP US.

Having that said I can relate to what you said that you needed to masturbate every night before you went t o sleep. When i act out, I need to MB every night as well. For a few years almost every night I masturbated, and with that I fell asleep. i thought that there is no way out of this behavior. But Bh I am now sober for over 300 days and still counting 1 day at a time.

So what do you do from here? Good question

1. Maybe reread Markz post above.
2. read the GYE Handbook a few times.
3. read and post here on the forum.

The main thing is we need to be determined and stay here until (and after) we find the right solution for our problem.

P.s. you Wrote ITS A DESEASE LIKE ALCOHOLISIM. If you feel so, I would suggest you connect with DOV. He may be able to help you.

Lots of Hatzlacha

lomed wrote:


You know what I truly love about this place? People already know the different opinions and approaches that different people on the forums hold of, and they're comfortable saying "If you think it's a disease, touch base with this one. If not, try this guy". It's a real openness, honesty, and friendship that enables people here to say that, and I think it's amazing!

Thank you for responding to my post. For me its a lust. I have very specific fantasies with very specific people. A few years ago, I didn't need pornography but now I do. Obviously the dsease got worse with time. Every time I gave in to my yetzer hara, my yetzer hara got bigger and now its a disease.

However humiliated I am to say this its gotten to the point that I have all of the lusts I fantasize about written down and I pick one or two every night, whatever I feel lust for that night. Its literally a hobby for me, which I know is so terrible. It pains me so greatly, I cannot describe the pain in writing.

I need someone to support me and help me stop. I don't want therapy. I work very welll with practicle solutions. I have stopped many bad habits with very deep rooted causes using practicle solutions. But for this one I need a partner, somene who has experienced similar lusts and desires to help me stop and give me atzos and motivation.

Anyone here have similar experiences who have succeeded for a long period of time?

Also, SE is of no use for me. Of course I'm sure it helps others but for me, my yetzer hara for this habit is WAY smarter than some psychological "game" (I know its not a "game for others but it would be one for me). The whole pleasure I get from this lust is the "badness" of it. I don't know how else to say it. Its very weird and I think different than what a lot of people have experienced.

PLEASE...could someone direct me to a sponser who could work one on one through email with me?

How do you know so well what won't work for you?

Many people come on to this site thinking that they are so different from everyone else. It takes a while, but eventually many realize that they are simply perverts, just like me.

I don't. I would, however, like to try things I have a feeling may work for me first. I am hoping someone will answer my post from above.

I am looking for a sponser. Can someone point me in the right direction?