Try getting out of the fantasy and into "real life," even if just for a short time. Anybody need help around the house? Being unselfish for a few minutes might also help get us out of that mindset. We can only live in the fantasy when we are thinking of ourselves.

Bigmoish wrote:


Bigmoish you've been holdin' my hand since 'inception', you feel to me like my older brother, but brothers can fight...

No! this fantasy IS real life.

Thinkin about ourselves is a separate topic.

These lustful thoughts are real life which may just lead to deadend, but when lust has taken over, who cares about tomorrow?

I disagree. Spending time with a stripper, cultivating the fakest of relationships, is not real life. It is as real as an amusement park. When the roller coaster stops, the ride is done.

My point was that 'fantasy' is not enough a reason to desist from lust

It's not just a figment of our imagination, its real life, yeah a bad life...
I think your point wasn't that it's fantasy, rather that it's wrong and unfulfilling. Correct me if I'm wrong bro'

My lusts and fantasies are very real meaning in the sense that they aren't just once in a while whims that leave as they come, but are constantly comeing back and affecting my life. But they aren't real life in respect to genuine meaning nor substance. A strippers job is to make a new life for their customer, whether for a few minutes or for longer by keeping in touch afterwards. But that new life is a bubble that bursts as fast as it came. All of this stuff: pornography, strippers, etc. are all bubbles that entertain a new "reality" but are based on nothingness because it was never there but for the purpose of destroying me (or taking my money)

Markz how do define real life? What do you mean by not caring about tomorrow?

Chiam wrote:


Might be a great name....almost like chaim.

markz wrote:


Allow me to speak for my brother.
He did not mean that it was wrong....he meant what he said....it is fantasy and not real life. Now, you might be right that in middle of a lustful fantasy, that will not help, but truthfully, there is little that does help at that time. As soon as that fantasy hits, I throw it the Hell out, using the words of AE....I wanna have no part of that!

Chiam wrote:
That is exactly what I meant.
So, how was your night, brother?

I will readily agree with Bigmoish and cool name Cordoy. Sorry Markz, but it is a figment of our imagination. Speaking for myself at least, when that lust hits me, I try to put myself into a frame of mind that this is real. This fabrication can be on varying levels. When I watch a movie, I "put myself" in the movie to an extent in order to appreciate the movie. When I watch pornography, I am even more attuned to what I am watching because it makes me feel as if I am doing whatever illicit things I am gazing at, and makes me feel as if I am having a special relationship with whoever I am watching. On an even more extreme level, when I am having physical relationship with an actual person, my sense of reality is heightened even more. My masquerade is more effective because I have someone telling me they like me with out the help of my creative mind and they text me to see how I'm doing.

But this is all a figment of my imagination. I am not doing anything of the sort of things I'm watching and there is no special secret relationship with any actor I see on screen. The only reality is that I'm killing my life and soul by putting that DVD in. Even if I'm in fact having a "relationship" with something, it isn't based on anything besides for that each party wants to get pleasure for themselves.

So fantasy [i]is[i] a reason to desist from lust because a part of lust (at least at my level of addiction) is to create some perverse reality that has much reality- as Bigmoish put it -as a roller coaster, or similarly as a movie: It ends when the DVD is done or when the money is out.

And to answer your question Bigmoish... My night was great! This forum really helps! My mind gets muddled when I get into those situations and it allowed me to express myself in a logical normal way. Thanks so much!

Chiam wrote:


CordNoy!
Dammit!

Ok chaiaim?

haha.. I think we had a bad start.. Start over clean?

Chiam wrote:


Sure!
No problem.