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Why is it so hard?
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Why is it so hard? 5971 Views

Re: Why is it so hard? 29 Jan 2023 22:18 #391380

  • frank.lee
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Amazing idea!!!! Thanks for the inspiration!!

Re: Why is it so hard? 29 Jan 2023 22:18 #391381

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Hey, Reb Geshmak! I love your post. Mamash gevaldig!
Feel free to say hi. My email is 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com

Re: Why is it so hard? 31 Jan 2023 03:14 #391416

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I had small fall but big win last night BH! My wife has mid winter vacation so I took a day of Yeshivah to spend some time with her... I was nervous because I have a problem with guarding my eyes and going place is not easy... But BH I stayed focused on her and didn't looking around and it was a smashing success... But the yh hasn't happy that I was happy and when I got home at 1am I sat down on my couch to relax a few min. With my phone. And somehow I figure out a way to get around my very strong filter I wasn't even trying it just happened so I scrolled a few min. But than stoped and I text hhm that if I touch the phone again during the night I will give him 1000 bucks... Believe me it wasn't easy but I just went to sleep and woke clean! Thank you H’! Now I gotta take care of this hole and get on with my new clean life... 
Thank you yeshivah guy for the 1000 dollar idea. It worked for me for last night.
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!

Re: Why is it so hard? 31 Jan 2023 04:36 #391420

  • geshmak!
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Just fell. 
don’t know why. I wish I could’ve just stopped  but I just wasn’t there…. Whatever 
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!

Re: Why is it so hard? 31 Jan 2023 04:42 #391422

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Geshmak! wrote on 31 Jan 2023 04:36:
Just fell. 
don’t know why. I wish I could’ve just stopped  but I just wasn’t there…. Whatever 

THE GYE FALL PICKUP UP SQUAD HAS ARRIVED!

WHAT HAPPENED?

LETS US KNOW AS WE SHARE ALL UNSOLICITED INFO WITH THE SUPERVISOR AND HE WILL MAKE SURE THATS THE LAST TIME IT HAPPENS!

If it’s to do with filters, TAG is the responsible party - our squad is not associated with games!
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Re: Why is it so hard? 31 Jan 2023 18:16 #391430

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Geshmak! wrote on 31 Jan 2023 04:36:
Just fell. 
don’t know why. I wish I could’ve just stopped  but I just wasn’t there…. Whatever 

Did you get right back up?

The Be’er Mayim Chayim says that in the army, when they would want to test a great soldier to see if he's fit to be a general, they would put him on a wild horse that was impossible not be thrown off of. Although no one could stay on that horse, the test was only to see how fast he would get back up after he was brutally thrown down and wounded.

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 04:26 #391444

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Thx so much for your chizuk!!
basically I’m a clinical sex addicted and the real only cure for me would be to go to sa but for now I can’t join. So I really got to be careful with not having access to any form of stimulation cause if I do I seriously can’t control. But I’m not giving up! No way! Im gonna now bhy get to day 90 I got there before and I’m gonna get there again with H’s help! Im gonna focus more on עשה טוב more than on staying away from עשה רע,in other words I’m gonna make kablahs on doing good stuff and מימאלה I’ll have power to over come my crazy fire of lust. 
btw I don’t really get this whole karma thing but it’s interesting that yesterday I saw I went from 4 to 3 I don’t really care if I don’t have high number but I felt bad that someone put down my number like was upset or whatever with me. But today when I came on I saw it was back to 4 I felt good I think someone must of realized that someone put down and he put it back up so I shouldn’t feel bad… thank you so much you made me feel good. I don’t know who you ar but you know who you are… you should be gebentcht!!
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!

Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 04:48 #391447

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Geshmak! wrote on 01 Feb 2023 04:26:
Thx so much for your chizuk!!
basically I’m a clinical sex addicted and the real only cure for me would be to go to sa but for now I can’t join

There’s a well known segula that helps for this. 

You say these words 3 times and watch the magic happen as you speak!!

the real only cure for me would be to go to sa but honestly I don’t want to join
My Story---------Dov Quotes




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Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 05:24 #391449

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Markz wrote on 01 Feb 2023 04:48:

Geshmak! wrote on 01 Feb 2023 04:26:
Thx so much for your chizuk!!
basically I’m a clinical sex addicted and the real only cure for me would be to go to sa but for now I can’t join

There’s a well known segula that helps for this. 

You say these words 3 times and watch the magic happen as you speak!!

the real only cure for me would be to go to sa but honestly I don’t want to join

Believe me I want to join! My life would be so much better and calmer… I don’t really want to discuss this on a public forum but basically my sponsor told me I’ll learn to much bad and not take out to much from the program. Because I’m addict that didn’t do to much like get to rock bottom (bh) so I don’t feel I need 12 steps to save my life and he says that to have success in sa is only if your really into it and feel you can’t live life with out it. I spoke to my therapist and Hhm about it it’s a long story. I’m actually reading the book and like it but I wish to be part of a group that can understand me or even talk to one other sex addict that relates to me and my struggles ( like my wife just can’t understand why I can control myself) my sponsor said he’ll try to get me a partner to read the book with but so far he hadn’t found anybody. But I’m not giving up! I have he’s number and he told me to call him when I feel I can’t live with out 12 sep program but I hope not to get their. 
it’s not so clear what I’m writing but if you would be involved in this I think you would understand.
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!
Last Edit: 01 Feb 2023 05:39 by geshmak!.

Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 10:59 #391453

  • doingtshuva
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You don't want to join or for now you cant join ??
 *  NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!
 *  I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.
 *  Being curios made me lust and get into trouble.

אָמַר רבי יוחנן: אֵבֶר קָטָן יֵשׁ לוֹ לָאָדָם, מַרְעִיבוֹ = שָׂבֵעַ, מַשְׂבִּיעוֹ = רָעֵב

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Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 14:46 #391462

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Let me try to be a little more clear.
basically I have done crazy dangerous silly foolish stuff because of my sex drive. Which means that I’m a addict( I can’t go into details but things that could’ve destroyed my life and the life of my family) but I bh never hooked up with anybody (even though I was close) and at sa a lot or maybe most have been with others and by me being there and hearing how others did it and how they felt before ( I won’t even hear the second half how they felt after) I will get very triggered and probably will cv fall into the worst. But in a way if I’m addict I need to know how to control myself and how to live life as an addict. Like if I’m gonna be in a situation when I have access to bad stuff or worse will I be able to control myself??? So what a גוי would do is go fall 20 times do the worst of the worst and hit the rock bottom and then see for himself that he can’t live with out sa 12 step. But I’m bh a yid and I can’t do that. So I was really stuck and I couldn’t decided what to do so I spoke to people with a lot of experience and I am in touch with them. But yes I wish to join sa and get helped it for now it won’t help me it probably will make me worse r’l… but I’m not giving up on a clean life! Yes addicted or not I’m a Jew and my father in haven which made become a addict gave a Torah with rules and this apply even for addicts. And he will give me the kiach j need to fight my addiction ( cause I CANT do it myself) H’ which split the ים סוף will split my problems and let me free of my מצרים.  Bhy!!
but I have to do mine to be careful and watch that I don’t fall again so I was mekabul on myself for the next 40 days to say אלקי נשמה and in the week days the יהי רצון from before putting on my תפלין in side my סדור and think the words and have in mind what I’m saying. 
Thank you everyone for just being here to listen to me. This platform is not stam just that a person can type hes problems and get it off hes chest is enough ( besides all the chizuk and ideas that come out of this Heligah site!!!) Kol tov!!
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!
Last Edit: 01 Feb 2023 14:51 by geshmak!.

Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 15:39 #391463

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Geshmak! wrote on 01 Feb 2023 14:46:
Let me try to be a little more clear.
basically I have done crazy dangerous silly foolish stuff because of my sex drive. Which means that I’m a addict( I can’t go into details but things that could’ve destroyed my life and the life of my family) but I bh never hooked up with anybody (even though I was close) and at sa a lot or maybe most have been with others and by me being there and hearing how others did it and how they felt before ( I won’t even hear the second half how they felt after) I will get very triggered and probably will cv fall into the worst. But in a way if I’m addict I need to know how to control myself and how to live life as an addict. Like if I’m gonna be in a situation when I have access to bad stuff or worse will I be able to control myself??? So what a גוי would do is go fall 20 times do the worst of the worst and hit the rock bottom and then see for himself that he can’t live with out sa 12 step. But I’m bh a yid and I can’t do that. So I was really stuck and I couldn’t decided what to do so I spoke to people with a lot of experience and I am in touch with them. But yes I wish to join sa and get helped it for now it won’t help me it probably will make me worse r’l… but I’m not giving up on a clean life! Yes addicted or not I’m a Jew and my father in haven which made become a addict gave a Torah with rules and this apply even for addicts. And he will give me the kiach j need to fight my addiction ( cause I CANT do it myself) H’ which split the ים סוף will split my problems and let me free of my מצרים.  Bhy!!
but I have to do mine to be careful and watch that I don’t fall again so I was mekabul on myself for the next 40 days to say אלקי נשמה and in the week days the יהי רצון from before putting on my תפלין in side my סדור and think the words and have in mind what I’m saying. 
Thank you everyone for just being here to listen to me. This platform is not stam just that a person can type hes problems and get it off hes chest is enough ( besides all the chizuk and ideas that come out of this Heligah site!!!) Kol tov!!

My experience in SA has been VERY different then what you describe.Happy to chat if you'd like.

Wishing you tons of Hatzlacha 

Re: Why is it so hard? 01 Feb 2023 16:08 #391464

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@Geshamk!
thats good to hear!!!
*** READ THIS***
You may see a low number of clean days, but don't forget to add 700 days to it, YES! you're reading it well, Seven Hundred plus  amount of days

Re: Why is it so hard? 02 Feb 2023 02:54 #391492

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Ybird wrote on 01 Feb 2023 16:08:
@Geshamk!
thats good to hear!!!

?!?!
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!

Re: Why is it so hard? 02 Feb 2023 02:55 #391493

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Shmuel wrote on 01 Feb 2023 15:39:

Geshmak! wrote on 01 Feb 2023 14:46:
Let me try to be a little more clear.
basically I have done crazy dangerous silly foolish stuff because of my sex drive. Which means that I’m a addict( I can’t go into details but things that could’ve destroyed my life and the life of my family) but I bh never hooked up with anybody (even though I was close) and at sa a lot or maybe most have been with others and by me being there and hearing how others did it and how they felt before ( I won’t even hear the second half how they felt after) I will get very triggered and probably will cv fall into the worst. But in a way if I’m addict I need to know how to control myself and how to live life as an addict. Like if I’m gonna be in a situation when I have access to bad stuff or worse will I be able to control myself??? So what a גוי would do is go fall 20 times do the worst of the worst and hit the rock bottom and then see for himself that he can’t live with out sa 12 step. But I’m bh a yid and I can’t do that. So I was really stuck and I couldn’t decided what to do so I spoke to people with a lot of experience and I am in touch with them. But yes I wish to join sa and get helped it for now it won’t help me it probably will make me worse r’l… but I’m not giving up on a clean life! Yes addicted or not I’m a Jew and my father in haven which made become a addict gave a Torah with rules and this apply even for addicts. And he will give me the kiach j need to fight my addiction ( cause I CANT do it myself) H’ which split the ים סוף will split my problems and let me free of my מצרים.  Bhy!!
but I have to do mine to be careful and watch that I don’t fall again so I was mekabul on myself for the next 40 days to say אלקי נשמה and in the week days the יהי רצון from before putting on my תפלין in side my סדור and think the words and have in mind what I’m saying. 
Thank you everyone for just being here to listen to me. This platform is not stam just that a person can type hes problems and get it off hes chest is enough ( besides all the chizuk and ideas that come out of this Heligah site!!!) Kol tov!!

My experience in SA has been VERY different then what you describe.Happy to chat if you'd like.

Wishing you tons of Hatzlacha 

אמן!!!
What do you mean by chat, Pm?
Guys the only way were really gonna get help is with H’s help so we gotta beg him for help and he sure will help us cause he wants us helped!!
CRY TO HIM!!
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/2-What-Works-for-Me/387630-Powerful!#387630

Feel free to pm me!
Last Edit: 02 Feb 2023 02:56 by geshmak!.
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