I haven't commented much, but I've followed your thread throughout. You are trying. After this fall you have 2 options - feel depressed. Sad. Demotivated. Breeze through Rosh Hashona despondent and down. Or you can look up at Hashem and say - I only joined this site recently. And I've fallen only once since then. We both knew it wasn't gonna be easy. There were going to be ups and downs. But I've fixed my filter, done all I can to stop it happening again. So now I'm back on my feet ready to give this new year another crack. I ain't perfect, but I'm trying. That's all I can do. I totally need you.

I'm not preaching, I'm talking to myself. Just letting you join in. Anywaay, don't give up. Crack on. Keep making us all proud.

Kesiva v'chasima tova.

Im Tevakshena Kakasef wrote on 17 Sep 2020 21:03:

This post is a masterpiece

Thank you everyone for the incredible feedback.

I'm currently on day 3, had a couple ups and downs since the fall I posted about here, but I'm back now and committed to succeeding long term. I've developed a plan, which comprises of:

1) 10 min daily limud of zos brisi
2) DAILY update on this forum with no exception other than Shabbos/Yom Tov
3) Keep my laptop in as public of an area as I can whenever possible
4a) If I intentionally look at inappropriate content on the internet, I have to donate $50 to a tzedaka that I have in mind
4b) If I start masterbating but stop before I finish, then I have to donate an additional $50
4c) If I finish, I have to donate an additional $50
5) Daven every day during tefilah for help from G-d

IYH I will be zoche to long term, meaningful success, let me know what you guys think.

strivingforbetter wrote on 25 Sep 2020 13:49:

I wish you great success. You inspire me.

I am wondering about your laptop. Do you have filtered Internet? The greatest tool that I have to help me in this struggle is a good filter. I use GenTech Solution, but there are other good ones out there as well. It is worth spending the money.

strivingforbetter wrote on 25 Sep 2020 13:49:

Regarding #2 especially with so many Shabbos/Yom Tovs coming up, its worth finding out, perhaps gye has a ShabbosG-Y on call?

I use webchaver, but a while ago found an easy way to avoid screen sharing when I've looked for inappropriate content. So I've mostly been using the filter part of it, which covers a lot of things. Unfortunately there are many ways to bypass filters and not every single bad website is blocked, so I've been manually blocking the ones that aren't automatically blocked

Day 4 - Success,

BH Shabbos has never really been a struggle for me with this, happy to move into Yom Kippur with a little bit of a streak, and show G-d that this is the real me!

Markz wrote on 27 Sep 2020 00:17:

Maybe they can hire one with the $300,000 they're raising...

Anyway, keep up the good work, strivingforbetter.

Gemar chasima tova.

Day 5 & 6 - Success,

Don't have much to add but BH I've been sticking to my plan so far and it's going well!

Day 7 & 8 - Success,

Made it through day 8 with huge amount of help from G-d!! Yesterday I had the urge a few times, but because of the gedarim that I put in place, I was able to stand strong and overcome them. It made me think that sometimes the thing that's really standing in our way is a fear of commitment to a plan with real roadblocks set up to save us from falling, because then we know we can't fall back on it when we want. I'm confident for the future, though still very aware of my tremendous yetzer hara and iyh will not let my guard down.