Hi
I'm twenty years old, single, in yeshiva
I've been sruggeling with masturbation for a good eight years now and porn for five

These past few years has been hell. I was feeling empty and guilty for doing something I knew was wrong in every way, that feeling of helplessness was killing me in the inside

Bh I found GYE a few weeks ago and realized that I'm not alone in this struggle and that I cld be helped.

I started my 90 day challenge yesterday and completed a full day clean!!!!

thing is.. since I started it yesterday. I have this "consistent" urge to "act out", I mean I've had urges before and plenty.. but it usually came once or twice a day, it was never this consistent,

My question is, is this normal for this stage of recovery or is it a sign of something I'm not doing right?

And I know this is just the starting point of my journey. and that I need to work on a long term recovery plan...

Id love to hear some feedback on what worked for some of you guys and some day by day tips regarding the 90 day challenge

Sounds like you're trying to make it to 90 days with "white nuckling"
I don't know of anyone that succeeded long term with this tool
10 nuckles, can only last as much as they're designed to

I thought so too
Question is, what cld I change regarding that. Is it attitude?
Or I'm I on the wrong path

I wouldn't say wrong path, but I think white nuckling is something we've both been doing for many years

Have you read the handbook yet?
oops - I haven't

At least try the GPS Solutions in my signature, and share what real tools you think will work for you - even opening up to someone may be the right thing

The FAQ's are informative as well. You can find a link in my signature.

Look around the site.
There's plenty of good stuff in every nook and cranny.

One of the cool nooks is cordnoys 1:20 daily call

Welcome! Fellow 20 year old (former) yeshiva guy. Many of us go through withdrawal symptoms when we give up our drug.

Welcome! Glad you decided to jump on the 90 day truck.
A perspective that has helped me immensely is when I realized that I need to shift my focus about this struggle. Until recently it was always a "religious issue". In other words, I really want all this shmutz and had I not been frum I would indulge myself in all these taavos and the only thing stopping me is because I know it's wrong. This is guaranteed to fail!
I learned to understand that I don't want to lust because life is hell with it, as you yourself attested to. Even if I wasn't frum, my lust will never be satisfied with porn, masturbating etc. And so I will forever be on chase for sex stimulation in some form or other and will always be miserable. So I've come to realize - I don't want to lust because I want to live a happy and content life!
As someone going through the Yeshiva system this may rub us the wrong way. Shouldn't everything we do be in terms of what is ratzon Hashem? This mahalach sounds like a self centered motivation. But the truth seems to be that it just doesn't work that way with this nisayon, and we got to do what works in order to break free.
Think about this. I think you will find you can identify with this perspective. I've been in your boat for years and now for the first time I've been clean for almost 50 days and I'm feeling so much happier than I've ever felt with all the fleeting-pleasure shmutz.
Hatzlacha!

First of all thanx everybody for your input
I will go through everything mentioned and see what helps
Regarding what ben.Torah.baal.habayis said about perspective
I actually totally agree about that.
And as yeshiva bocher... I'm sorry but it doesn't bother me,... I mean hashem created this nisoyan and he knows what will and won't help me.... with that in mind and knowing that he wants you to stop.. just remember that he's the who decided what's gonna help or not.. obviously he doesn't want you chasing down the wrong way.. thats not even self centered that's just recognizing the cure... (in a way it might be like someone with cancer refusing treatment by a doctor for fear of being "self centered"... well..maybe I'm going a little [or a lot] too far) and maybe I don't make sense but that's my opinion.. well than for listening.. if anyone is...

Just getting to the end of my third day
B"h the consistent lusting is waring off
I think it has a lot to do with my attitude,
I recognize that this addiction is not in my control and only hashem cld help me get through the day!
In the morning when I wake up I speak to hashem and ask him to give me the strength to stay clean today.
And I've found that posting here gives me some sense that I'm not in it alone. And it helps
So thank you

You're doing great! Keep on trucking and don't hesitate to reach out for chizuk!