Super attitude chaver! You are one focused fellow. Keep on posting. Do you have a support system? Anyone you speak to about this? It helped me when i would be in a crunch...

Hashem Help Me wrote on 01 May 2018 11:25:

I don't have anything/anyone but that is a smart idea.

So maybe look around the forum and see who you think can be helpful to you and send them a PM (private message)

It's a slippery slope... thankfully will have people around for the next 4 nights. Made it to 14. 2 weeks. Not in as high of spirits as I'd have liked because of the recent slips, but the original goal was till my birthday next week, so I can still get there strong! Still... standing here at 2 weeks! 

At two weeks or so, withdrawal may set in, so expect some possible edginess, irritability, and urges. It is temporary. but that may explain your lack of high spirits.

Well, yesterday had another "slip" although I get more and more unsure of what I'm calling a slip vs. a fall. I decided 1 more slip like this, and I'd say I fell. In the meanwhile parts of my journey are still 100% in play, which is great, and we're so close now to reaching my first goal, next Thursday. 1 week away.

Thanks for sharing Hashem Help Me, although I think part of the low spirits was because of the slips. Anyway, good night!

HockShmockGeshmock wrote on 04 May 2018 04:29:

Could be I have more bottles open than you do... let's not compete!

But often slips and falls are actually because of the low spirits!
You need something a little stronger - like Reb KOT would offer his wood-ford truckers ;-)

Last night was normal - 16 days! BH! 

Thanks for the encouragement Markz. Good Shabbos!

Friday was clean - 17 days! Never figured out the chart properly bc it says I'm at 18 days but April 18 was my first clean day, so that's only 17 days.. either way... I can count myself

BH another clean night, 18! 

KOH&TG!!

Had a slip but made it to 19. Going to try hard to avoid slips the next few nights as I am so close to my first goal.

what was the slip and whats the plan for next time?

Hashem Help Me wrote on 07 May 2018 12:57:

Started looking at things that were not appropriate. Not as bad as something that I would consider a fall, but still inappropriate. I was actually tempted to look now, but seeing your message and how you care about a stranger has given me the strength to fight the urge. Thank you friend.

I plan to leave my phone outside the room tonight. Going to try to set up my old alarm clock so I don't use that as an excuse why I need the phone in my room.

Great idea to leave the phone out of the bedroom (and maybe bathroom too). Quite a few people have started using non internet phones in general so as not to have the nisayon constantly at their fingertips. They keep a tablet or laptop (filtered of course) for necessary internet usage.

Thank you for your kind words. Everyone on GYE cares very much. We will do almost anything to help relieve fellow yidden from the pain and anguish we all experienced ourselves. You are not a stranger. You are part of the family.