Keep the corn popping, no guilt to laugh

So let us have government over self, let us really listen, Shema to our Elohim!

peloni almoni wrote:
I noticed a new avatar



This is wrong and deceitful. You should be sued!

It is a trademark copyrighted depiction of this column, and all I can say is you're lucky PA is still in hibernation or those would be tears of somethin' else

markz wrote:
The perpetrator is online now.
Do you have anything to say in your defense?

A hip young man goes out and buys a 1997 Ferrari GTO . It is the best
and most expensive car available in the world, costing about $500,000.
He takes it out for a spin and while stopping for a red light, an old
man on a moped (both looking about 90 years old) pulls up next to him.
The old man looks over the sleek, shiny surface of the car and asks,

"What kind of car ya' got there, sonny?"

The young man replies, "A 1997 Ferrari GTO. They cost about a half
million dollars!"

"That's a lot of money," says the old man, shocked. "Why does it cost
so much?"

"Because this car can do up to 320 miles an hour!" states the cool dude
proudly.

The moped driver asks, "Can I take a look inside?"

"Sure," replies the owner.

So the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Leaning
back on his moped, the old man says, "That's a pretty nice car, all
right!"

Just then the light changes so the guy decides to show the old man what
his car can do. He floors it, and within 30 seconds the speedometer
reads 320 mph. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror. It
seems to be getting closer!

He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly, whhhoooossshhh!
Something whips by him, going much faster! "What on earth could be
going faster than my Ferrari?!" the young man asks himself.

Then, ahead of him, he sees a dot cooming toward him. Whoooooosh! It
goes by again, heading the opposite direction! And it almost looked
like the old man on the moped!

"Couldn't be," thinks the guy. "How could a moped outrun a Ferrari?!"
Again, he sees a dot in his rear view mirror! Whooooosh Ka-BlaamMMM!

It plows into the back of his car, demolishing the rear end. The young
man jumps out, and it IS the old man!!! Of course, the moped and the
old man are hurting for certain. He runs up to the dying old man and
says, "You're badly hurt! Is there anything I can do for you?"

The old man moans and replies, "Yes, Unhook my suspenders from your
side-view mirror!"

[quote="markz" post=272938]A hip young man goes out and buys a 1997 Ferrari GTO . It is the best
and most expensive car available in the world, costing about $500,000.
He takes it out for a spin and while stopping for a red light, an old
man on a moped (both looking about 90 years old) pulls up next to him.
The old man looks over the sleek, shiny surface of the car and asks,
A smile for the next miles of your journey.

There are dirty jokes being posted on a different thread, so in return I gotta post a clean joke here
Anyone had issues with Microsoft Programs?
The ultimate Revenge
"Brussels police department, how may I assist you?"

"Uh.. yes.. I just got hit in the face with a cream pie."

"Okay, sir. Have you called the Brussels police department before?"

"No"

"Well, let me get a little information about you for our records. Your name?"

"Bill Gates"

"Country?"

"The USA"

"Native language?"

"English"

"Okay, sir. Your police department ID number is BP31415927. Please use this number the next time you call. Now, you say you were hit in the face with a pie?"

"Yes, I was just about to meet with the Belgian Prime Minister. One person distracted me while another hit me with a cream pie."

"We've had other customers report that they were hit in the face with a custard pie. Are you sure it was a cream pie?"

"Well, I have white stuff all over my face and I don't see any custard, so I really don't think it was a custard pie."

"Have you visited the Prime Minister before?"

"Yes"

"Were you hit in the face with a pie then?"

"No"

"Hmm... have you visited any other Prime Ministers in the past month?"

"Yes"

"Any pies then?"

"No"

"Okay, well.. let's try something. Go outside the building and come in again. I'll wait."

"Just a minute.." <

"Okay, I'm back." "Did you get hit by another pie?"

"Of course not"

"Well sir, I don't know what could have caused the first pie, but it looks like things are working fine now. I'll make a note of the problem, though. If it happens again, please note the exact details of the situation and call us again. Thank you for calling the Brussels Police Department. <>

This type of humor is really not me, I sure it helps others, so maybe once in awhile I will read. I have other focuses here, and I will search them out. My prayers is for all to have victory over pornography, and self abuse.

So stick to the regular "depressed people's chill spot" ;-)
Just kiddin' - do what works for your holy truck

markz wrote:
By the way, the guy that authored this Hardcore thread left us and became a Saint

Every guy has to do what works for him

I see thank you for your work, so please continue it. You will have links with many a struggling one, so stand your place giving smiles!

Twitter to Expand Tweet's 140-Character Limit to 10000