Avrom wrote:


Sorry, this is the best I could do!

DUDE! How about some vector? That way it wouldn't be so pixelated. Or maybe check out the ppi. Is it 300 or 72? Also is it rgb or cmyk?

Don't forget to have the following kavanos in naanuim

Avrom wrote:


tryingtoshteig wrote:


Keep on Tanking!

This thread made me smile and laugh.

Thanks markzzzzzzzz.

Obama with a Teleprompter

The captain of a Syrian airliner announces, "This is Syrian Airliner 174. We have an emergency! We have lost an engine and want to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel."

No answer.

A short while later things get worse, "This is Syrian Airliner 174 again. We have lost TWO engines and ask permission to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel."

Again, no answer from anyone.

A little later the pilot in desperation says, "This is Syrian Airliner 174. We are in need of help. We have lost three engines and need permission to land at any airport in the Mideast OTHER than Israel.

Still no answer from anyone.

Finally, the Captain calls, "Help! This is Syrian Airliner 174, we have only one engine left and it is rapidly failing. Unless we can land we are going to crash. We need permission to land at ANY airport in the Mideast, INCLUDING Israel.

Shortly thereafter, a voice is heard in the Syrian airplane cockpit: "This is Tel Aviv airport calling Syrian Airliner 174. We would like to help."

"G-d bless you," said the Syrian pilot. "What should we do?"

Responded Tel Aviv airport, "Repeat after me: Yitgadal, v'yitgadash..."

This is what trucking struggling to recover looks like

The plane leaves Heathrow Airport under the control of a Jewish captain; his co-pilot is Chinese. It's the first time they've flown together and an awkward silence between the two seems to indicate a mutual dislike.

Once they reach cruising altitude, the Jewish captain activates the auto-pilot, leans back in his seat, and mutters, 'I don't like Chinese..'

'No rike Chinese?' asks the co-pilot, 'why not?'

'You people bombed Pearl Harbor, that's why!'

'No, no', the co-pilot protests, 'Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah! That Japanese, not Chinese.'

'Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese... .doesn't matter, you're all alike!'

There's a few minutes of silence.

'I no rike Jews!' the co-pilot suddenly announces.

'Oh yeah, why not?' asks the captain.

'Jews sink Titanic!' says the co-pilot.

'What? You're insane! Jews didn't sink the Titanic!' exclaims the captain, 'It was an iceberg!'

Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, Rosenberg...no mattah...all same

Two Jews were sitting in a Tel Aviv cafe in the precarious days
after Israel first had won its independence, and one said to
the other, "I only see one way out."

"What's that?"

"Israel must declare war on the United States."

"What are you talking about? How could that possibly help us?"

"Well, we'd lose at once and the Americans would send an
occupying force. They would form an alliance with a new
pro-American government, guarantee our boundaries, flood us
with American capital, establish our industries, and make
us prosperous."

"Hmmmm! I see your point, but it won't work."

"Why not?"

"Because with Jewish luck, we'd win the war and spoil everything."

Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 21 Aug 2013 00:14:
markz wrote on 31 Jan 2016 18:03:


To walk or not to walk - part 2

1- I'm not into working out.
My philosophy is no pain, no pain

2- I'm in shape
Round is a shape

markz wrote on 02 Feb 2016 02:51:


working Guy wrote:


Does it work the other way too?

When the wife works on her part, all of a sudden we will have more resolve to lose a little more weight = "G's - Gym"??