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Losing one’s shiduch and tikunim
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TOPIC: Losing one’s shiduch and tikunim 522 Views

Re: Losing one’s shiduch and tikunim 27 Mar 2025 13:49 #433591

  • yitzchokm
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I am not a Breslover but I found in ליקוטי מהר"ן תנינא תורה פז that somebody who has פגם הברית may not find his zivug and even if he does find his zivug he won't have shalom bayis. GYE advertises that people who struggle with kedusha have double the divorce rate of the regular population. The Likutei Maharan writes that some people do find their zivug. As HHM wrote, the statistics are that almost all people find their zivug. The regular divorce rate was 10% so it would make the divorce rate of people struggling with kedusha 20%. Regarding tikunim, as HHM wrote the first thing is to become clean. You can daven that you find your zivug, that you have shalom bayis and that you become clean but it isn't healthy to assume that you won't have them because that will only make it harder for you to become clean.

Re: Losing one’s shiduch and tikunim 27 Mar 2025 14:22 #433594

  • chosemyshem
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Great points El Capitan.

Happened to randomly see in the Rabbi Biderman pamphlet this week that exhausting yourself preparing for pesach is a tikkun for this. 

While, again, I think there's very good arguments for not focusing on this at all, if you want to do a tikun of some flavor this is one that will not only make your family very happy, but also will supercharge your pesach.

It's also limited in time so it will likely not become something neurotic. Just keep in mind that R' Levi Yitzchok once said that everyone could attain ruach hakodesh by cleaning for pesach, but they lose it by getting angry. (Source: the same Rabbi Biderman pamphlet.)

Hatzlacha!

Re: Losing one’s shiduch and tikunim 27 Mar 2025 20:37 #433623

  • gevura shebyesod
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Mishna Berura (460:7) brings down from the Ari Zal that Shvitzing by Matzah baking is a Tikkun for this.
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!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
Last Edit: 27 Mar 2025 20:51 by gevura shebyesod.
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