chosemyshem wrote on 20 Jun 2024 17:37:

Agreed. We are discussing a way to alleviate a different issue. I wish I knew of a way to get the info to the masses and help with the issue you are raising. Happens to be GYE does advertise, but people don't really know what it is. If the oilam has ideas how to get this out there, I'm sure the guys who run this place will be thrilled to hear. (Hey, IWLR, do you have any ideas?)

Assuming that many/most bachurim/yungerleit have marbles... they understood very well what he meant in his speech.

No, it wasn't about cake...

How many times have I (others?) fallen and thought of ourselves as jerks with no way out?! Hearing this, that the fall is not a disappointment, just a proof of the sacrifice, is a tremendous source of chizzuk (for me, at least).

Is there a number or someway to find that particular speech? I had never called that Hotline before and was having trouble finding it. 

adam2014 wrote on 23 Jun 2024 10:47:

I can email it to you, if you want. PM me your email, I'll send it beH

his speech by the internet asifa was memorable and years ahead of its time...

adam2014 wrote on 23 Jun 2024 10:47:

Torahanytime.com, class ID#304845

So, I posted on Proudyungerman's thread that I want to give his letter to a Rav. I am happy to report that I gave his letter to Rabbi Wachsman. And I told him a little about myself, too. Yes, it was embarrassing. Yes, I wanted to chicken out. But I didn't. He knows me, and although giving a letter is nice, there's no comparison to hearing all about it from a person you know from before, and I hoped to make an impact, that he realize the truth about this resource.
I told Rabbi Wachsman a little about what GYE does, who are the people that are here, etc. My main point to him was, I want you know that there is help for all those people coming to you, for all those people writing letters to you, for all the people that are struggling alone, which literally breaks my heart

As far as your question, Reb Chosemyshem, about what exactly will we accomplish, being that the rabbanim a) know about the issue, and b) they know about GYE
First of all, even someone like Rabbi Wachsman, who knows what's out there, it was clear to see that from knowing in his mind to feeling it in is bones is a vast distance. I don't know how many people in similar positions to mine have opened up to him, but so much I can say, he was obviously experiencing with a newness, with a 'wow. That's crazy'-ness. And that means that although the Rabbanim have a וידעת היום, they, due their purity, don't have a full והשבת אל לבבך.

As far GYE is concerned, he knew about it very vaguely. And he didn't really know what they do and what goes on here. I hope my sacrifice will have changed that

The main thing, dear friends, is this. As CMS, and others have pointed out there are so many silent sufferers. And even those who do reach out to their Rav, Rosh Yeshiva or rebbe, how many of those really know what GYE is about? How many of them know how  much help people can get here?
And, my dear friends, don't get angry at me for saying so, but it's up to us to change that! It won't do much if Yaakov Nadel comes down to your rav, or to my rav. A little, but...And now, imagine the impact of YOU going over to a rav, rosh yeshiva etc. and telling him about how GYE has helped YOU! I know, I'm crazy. But, dear friends, please think about it. Maybe, maybe, maybe, perhaps you would be willing to speak to someone? Not your rav, maybe MY rav? 

Friends, if you have a different way of educating our rabbanim, of getting the GYE message out there, by all means, please chime in! But we gotta remember, WE, the people who are here and really know what it's about, have an achrayus to share it. What can YOU do?

Awesome! You were moser nefesh for klal yisroel!!

A small thing is - GYE is not a perfect solution for everyone. I think young bachurom who are suffering from or addicted to p/m, but not exposed to the underbelly of the internet or whatever, maybe they need something more safe, less explicit about certain things, just like the BB forum is off-limits officially? In other words, if I knew a 15 year tmimusdike bachur was having an issue, but does not have unfiltered internet, I think I would not want to send him here. Makes sense?

Of course, for people who are fully exposed to the world's garbage, send him over to GYE, and the Rabanim should know about this crucial and powerful resource, for those people.

eerie wrote on 25 Jun 2024 20:00:

Wow, ashreicha! It's not so much a chiddush to me when someone opens up to a Rav or whomever about themselves. Yeah it's tough (too tough for me) but at the end of the day it's "change or die" and people are motivated to not die, to break out of the cycle of pain. But when someone opens up and puts himself and his shameful story out there, not to help himself, but to hopefully help others I'm truly inspired.

Dov said in a shuir something like opening up honestly is a crucial part of getting clean, but don't go bang on the bima and announce that you can't control your masturbating because opening up doesn't require destroying your life. And here you have guys like PY and Eerie taking that risk and basically banging on the bima. And only to help others. Wow! I've never said "mi k'amcha yisroel" non-ironically before, but mi k'amcha yisroel!!

Strongly considering sending my own letter. Gonna sleep on that idea.

I only started getting adds for GYE after I started posting. Maybe GYE needs to change their marketing base. Idk exactly how it works  but I know that advertising companies use cookies to provide the consumer with adds that relate to their searches. How is someone that isn't looking for help gonna get an add from GYE?

eerie wrote on 25 Jun 2024 20:00:

I just read this last paragraph 5 times....  my heart is beating faster thinking about going over to my Rav,  or maybe even a Rebbi from a very long time ago. I might need someone to hold my hand

I remember when I scheduled the meeting with a Rav I felt I trusted. That day was the most terrified I have ever been in my life and I had to force myself to go through with it.
BH I did bc it was one of the most important things i did. As the Rav said it was the hardest thing I had ever done bc it's against the nature of one that is secret so long to reveal themselves. I believe it is an integral part in the journey to recovery.

It is VERY scary but it is EXTREMELY banaficial!!
Hatzlacha whether you do it or not!!

redfaced wrote on 25 Jun 2024 21:50:

If you let me out of that teacup, (ahem, babysitting - sorry) I'd be glad to!

But seriously, please consider doing just thatJUST DO IT! PLEASE
As R' Eerie said so beautifully, it's on us to change the status quo. That means all of us.

You know who you are, and now you are starting to realize what you can do to help others, and Klal Yisrael.

And, as R' Eerie also said, please please chime in if you have other ideas of how to get the word out!
אשריך!

frank.lee wrote on 25 Jun 2024 20:13:

Absolutely. A boy, or young man, or anyone for that matter, that struggles with regular shmiras einayim issues, or even masturbation issues but doesn't use the internet much, has not struggled with porn, I wouldn't think he should come here. I think there could be another idea set up, maybe a helpline for rabbanim, run by HHM or the like, that can offer real ideas that really help. But the many, many people, like myself, who have struggled with worse than that, they can really use this place. And that's the message we gotta get out there.

Friends, there's a great tzaddik here that has some ideas. Might sound somewhat radical to some, but hey, I think it's a crazy, wonderful idea. Will share more later, beH

eerie wrote on 26 Jun 2024 15:35:

your saying that GYE is not for people that do not struggle with porn? so it should be called GYEFP(orn)
the administrators say its also for regular yeshivish gaurding your eyes...........

(recenty they've been advertising, that its for people suffering from internet abuse....... whatever its confusing)

בשמגק