I hate to have to share the below. I'm sure I will disappoint some people. I am definitely disappointed in myself.

I fell late last night.
I was browsing a certain popular shopping site (name hidden to prevent triggers) and chanced on a inappropriate picture, that started a lust spree for about an hour on that site, and I began to touch myself. I finally caught myself and stopped and went to sleep.
I woke up 2-3 hours later, laying on my stomach, with such an urge to ejaculate. I unfortunately didn't hold back.

Lessons learned: Not much. I basically know all the lessons already, just need to implement them.

Things to do:

1. Finally close up the loophole that I mentioned 2 weeks ago. Even though I didn't fall through there and haven't checked it out again, it is about time I did something about it.
2. Exercise and relaxation techniques. Very important to make this a priority even when I'm not feeling the need for it.
3. Try to get to bed earlier. After 1am is not conducive to staying clean.
4. Perhaps lock all apps except important ones after 12:30am?

Will try to keep up my daily posts.

lionking wrote on 02 Mar 2021 18:41:

Hi
​I think people would be more disappointed if you would not share your progress. 
Our task on this world is to fight, not to win. Winning is a gift that we get sometimes and sometimes not. 

"ויאמר לא יעקב יאמר עוד שמך כי אם ישראל כי שרית עם אלהים ועם אנשים ותוכל"
  Yakov was not named תוכל for the winning, he was named  ישראל for the struggle... 

Please keep on sharing and NEVER give up!

Your honesty is commendable.
Your determination is admirable.

We all have much to learn from you.

Keep up the good fight.

One off the list. I closed that loophole. Now I need to close the hole in my head.

B"H I'm not feeling in despair like other times. Had a little hard time getting up this morning, which can also be because I need more than 4 hours of sleep. Other than that, I had a decent day. Made sure to take breaks at work today.

Hows it goin buddy?

YG,
Thanks for checking up.
I'm not doing well. I'm under the weather and my wife is not feeling well.
I'm swamped with work and just finished working for the day today.
I acted out 2 days ago.
I'm seriously lacking sleep.

Git Voch, 

My previous update on my thread was a little negative. I really shouldn't post close to 2am anymore.

B"H Shabbos was nice. Going to accept the fact that the next 2 weeks will be very busy. Hopefully I won't stress too much about it.
My wife is still not doing so great, so I got a double dose of house work/cleaning for pesach as well. 

Would really like to be able to just be together for hugs, but she is not feeling up to that either.

Wishing everyone a Git Chodesh

BH I'm extremely busy these days, both at work and at home. It is tempting to relax with you know what after a long day. I'm BH trying not to think in that direction. Really trying not to stress out these days.
I'm grateful that I have a job.
I'm grateful I have a beautiful family BH.
I'm grateful I can prepare for Pesach.

Wish I can get some more sleep and my wife should feel better.

I fell last night after 28 days.
The past week was murder.
Beginning from the first day of Chol Hamoed, It was constantly on my mind to masturbate and look at porn. As much as I tried to distract myself, it came back with such a vengeance.
My wife hasn't been available much the last while.

Last night was a combination of tiredness, rejection, and just a massive build up. Went searching for loopholes through the filter.
Today I am struggling to not go and repeat my fall, to put a stop to it and start fresh. I almost went to check out that site again.
Maybe going to set up screenshot accountability.

Screenshot accountability is really good

Do you have a filter?

Striving Avreich wrote on 08 Apr 2021 09:08:

Yes, he has a filter.


Harav Lionking happens to be one of the techiest guys around here so filtering might not be the answer, hence the idea of screenshot accountability. 

I fell again twice last night. Once with erotic content and the other time was just with masturbating a few hours later / this morning.
Funny thing is I wasn't trying to circumvent the filter, I was checking what I can access even with a filter. It is a pretty hard loophole to close, since it's business sites and the text has no reference to porn/nudity so an offensive word filter or a domain named filter cannot recognize it.

I switched out my browser today to pluckeye which blocks all video and images by default.Still researching screenshot accountability software. WebChaver / Convenant eyes recently doesn't work well at all. Perhaps Truple is a better option. 

lionking wrote on 09 Apr 2021 01:33:

What were your issues with webchaver?

lionking wrote on 09 Apr 2021 01:33:

Pls pm me, I have discount codes for truple if you want