Good Morning,

i know its 5:30am ........Have no words.. but i skipped a night of sleep....  I'm being struggling for awhile feeling down..last night my spouse looked on my phone & she saw my history & turned green.. ( i dont blame her) enough i'm going through, now I lost my trust..... it makes harder......I really I want to go out of this, H' help me out & rebuild our relationship for the best!!!!    

I'm sorry to hear that.
This could be your rock bottom...
Looks like you are now ready to work...
You say it makes it harder, but maybe it was harder to start recovery while everyone thinks theres no problem.
Maybe now it will be easier.
Much success!

Wow, that's harsh. 
A lot of us have been there.
You're in the right place.
Stick around. Read through some of the HUGE amount of good stuff
on this website.
And keep posting. 
It's a process...but we can all get there with HaShem's help.
Welcome.

Welcome to the club
Yep, know the feeling, feels terrible when she finds out at the beginning but better that way you have an extra external push for you to have to make it. Its for sure worth it, you will see your spouse in a different light after a while.
Stick around and good luck

Welcome. Sorry you're going through this. Many of us can relate. I found it helpful once I started focusing on being trustworthy myself rather than focusing on when she trusts me again.
wishing you much Hatzlacha!

Sorry to hear about the rough patch 
recovery should be with hatzlacha 

Do you have a Rav or Rebbe you can talk to?

Gosh. So sorry to hear. We're here to help. Unless it's how better to cover your tracks.

I don't recommend disclosure, but once it's already revealed it's helpful if it's resolved with guidance

This may help you

guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/269350-Karls-BB-Issues?limit=400#278373

Hatzlacha in this tough time!

Welcome to this awful/wonderful place,

All of us get here differently.

Sorry to hear about what you're goin' thru.

Recovery should be with hatzlachah

Thanks for all ur support!! I hope this is my way to recovery... 

Welcome!  You have come to the right place.  Many of us can relate exactly to what you are going through.  Check out the handbook.  Keep posting.  Tell us more about your history, what you have tried in the past etc.

I feel your pain. I've been horribly embarrassed and caught so many times. By my spouse, family, roommates, you name it. The shame is unbearable and there is a feeling that once the trust is broken it can never be rebuilt. But that's not true, TRUST ME!

I got caught by my wife doing things much "worse" than looking at porn, to the extend I needed to leave my family for 35 days and go into a rehab program. I never in a million years imagined that my wife (or in laws or parents - they all knew about it) would ever trust or respect me again but they all do.

Today, my wife is in love with me, maybe even obsessed with me (haha), and I'm far from the perfect husband. When we do teshuva, Hashem not only forgives us and makes the past as if it didn't exist, but he also makes others completely forget our actions and forgive us as well. It's as if the sins never happened.  You'll see.

Now time to move forward.

Welcome to this great place. As you can see, many people want to help you make it - and with Hashem's help, you will! Step one, keep posting. Tell us everything. Its a big relief to type it all out and receive the replies from the "been there done that" chevra. You will get advice, chizuk, direction, and understanding. Best wishes.

workingmyprogram wrote on 23 Mar 2017 04:00:

II am so happy for you and your progress and your relationship with your family. That is great news, and one that not everyone is zoche to. I envy your recovery.

Do you have a source that after repentance, God makes others forget about the past? I have never seen that and it seems to me unlikely that He does that, but I like to learn new things, so please enlighten me/us.

Thank you and continued hatzlachah

r' tzodok talks about teshuveah making you forget and hashem so i'm not sure others would be a far stretch i am posting it here post what you think 
its the last one on the page