Hi. I have been a member for a while...but only now finally had the courage to post on the forum! ..I have been struggling for around 4 years and cant seem to stay clean for more than a few weeks...every fall is really depressing and takes me a few days to get over the feelings of guilt, shame...I am desperate to stop and live a happy healthy life that I have when I am clean bH....I find that being strong in my avodas Hashem helps me to stay clean but the yetzer harah always finds away to knock me down...  

Welcome Chaim,
That's great that you've decided to start posting. You can gain a lot from chizuk and feedback people give. Don't dwell on your falls 

Welcome!
Stop fighting and let the fun begin!
Let go and let Gd

And let us join you on our mutual road to sobriety!!!

thank you! i think the hardest part is being so alone...no to talk to...

Many guys take years to realize that.

And many have found it even more helpful to be part of a live group of like minded people. 

Or perhaps call Dov or Cordnoy

If you want to get your feet wet - read some dov quotes (you can find the link to them in "Free Towing" page in the link below)

All the best 

thanks markz...

Welcome! It does take courage, but it's worth it! Do whatever it takes to get/stay sober, and never ever give up.

Hi all! thank you for your support. I have done 8 days clean now bH. I am finding it tough though. I find it very hard to control my thoughts..i feel that if I don't it will lead to a fall ch'v. Do I just 'hang on' and my mind will clear over time being clean? how do I clear my mind? 

I'm over a year Sober thank Gd and thanks to GYE

I have stuff in my mind - there are triggers all over - I never tried to clear my mind, and don't think that's the way to go

Have you started the Handbook...
What about Dov quotes I mentioned earlier, he's amazing!

Chiam,

Over all it will get easier, Hergel Naseh Teva.
Keep going.

wow! it's good to know that you managed a year with stuff on your mind! it gives me hope! yes I have started the handbook and does quotes they are great....i am not very far in with the hand book though...

thank you, I will keep going....this forum is amazing...it is great to be able to share my struggle with you it makes it a whole lot easier, i would have fallen if not for it....

It works both ways brother!

KOT

Hi all!
​I was 8 days clean last time i posted, but unfortunately i had a fall Sunday...what led to the fall was bordem (as it normally is)...but bH i got straight back up! I instilled a stronger filter and made stronger fences...and have been clean since...i do realise though that it is my head which needs sorting out..just making a stronger filter is not enough ...i have also started listening to the 12 step program they have here....thank you for the kick to keep on posting markz!!      

i posted before about controlling my thoughts...what i feel will helps me keep my mind clean and avoid falls is by keeping busy and have fulfilling days. to have sober days but to be miserable and empty will only be a matter of time till the next fall.
for me exercising helps me to clear my mind...it takes my mind of all the challenges life has to offer and i feel good after.
​the problem is, it is all nice being busy and keeping as happy and busy as can be...but life is a rollercoaster it will come down at some point..it won't stay up there forever...there will be a time when my day isn't as busy or i won't be able to go for a run for whatever reason or something can happen which will knock me off balance....then what? I have to have a plan B....i don't have much experience keeping clean for long....