Hi Everybody, I can't sleep. The reason, I've gone way too far. I haven't seen anybody talking about sexual relationships. I've been addicted to social media and porn for a loooong time. But lately entered into territory so bad I feel I can't stay sane without help. I've met up with women and did what I did. I want to STOP. Where can I get chizuk and get onto the right path, to change my bad ways?

Welcome Kedusha!

You can obtain chizuk from many scources of gye, e.g. Daily chizuk email, this forum, connecting with many many other successful guys here.

You just entered "the right path", which is paved and well ridden, it's called the gye Trucking highway, and with a GPS (see below) you can achieve tremendous Kedusha!!

Right Kedusha - first welcome and I wish you a full recovery.
Before going into what you have done, let me share with you that there are plenty of Balei Tshuva who are far more Frum then many Frum I guys I konw including myself. So we as Yiden belive in Tshuva NO matter how far we went !
Feeling bad is a very good sign, so from this bad feeling enter recovery and be ready to fight because it won't be easy.
I sadly know people who sleep very well after an affair, so be happy that you are still connected to God by feeling bad.
You wrote that you feel that you went more far then others, it might be true and it might be that they are just more ashamed than you to write about it. Wait and see you might get some Pm's from chevra who went through your situation and managed to break free.
Start out by reading the GYE Handbook, have a talk with Dov he helped me much.
For now I would advice you to forget about your past and concentrate only on your future. You'll do Tshuva for the past after gaining some sobriety.
Please stay with us and keep us updated.


 

Thanks for the assuring words, I appreciate them. However I'm wondering if GYE can help me with my addictions. I've briefly looked around this site, which has many great tools. But doesn't my problem require something more? The guilty feelings are biting me. I'm married, my wife thinks I'm the nicest person around. But I failed. I looked for other women. 

Welcome Right Kedusha!!!

Look around all over the forum many have gone through what you are going through. Many have change the're ways after years and years. Your not the only one.

Your between friends that understand and really care, and can really be a source of chizuk.

Stick arourd make yourself comfortable and keep on posting.

Hatzlacha rabba, Lokking forward to seeing you around!

Ok thank you very very much! I will stay around, as I really wanna turn around for the better. 

Rightkedusha wrote on Unknown:

Hi and welcome.
I have met many frum men in a similar situation to yours
who are actively experiencing recovery in SA.
Please see the link "12 Steps - Live Groups" in the Resources section below.
Hatzlocha.

Rightkedusha wrote on Unknown:


Welcome. It is possible that you do need something more, but you won't find out till you try what GYE has to offer. Certainly, GYE can get you on the right path and the right start, and if you see you need more- therapy, twelve steps, whatever else- you'll be coming from a much better place.

Everyone mentions Dov. You can send him a private message and even ask him if you can talk to him on the phone. He's been recovered for something like 18 years, is brilliant, honest, and pretty funny too. He was very helpful to me with one conversation.

The way that a lot of people start here is by reading other people's posts, and posting their own.

Markz has great resources and links in his signature, Cordnoy has two posts in his signature that are both worth reading (it'll take a while-they're long) and Dov is fantastic.

Then, you can also post honestly about your struggles and open up. Getting it off your chest, and letting other people offer input and share your struggle with you is very helpful. Remember, you're anonymous. Of course, if you're still not comfortable at least share whatever you can so that you can get the conversation started.

Hatzlacha, and there is a huge brotherhood here to help!

Thank you so much. I'm starting to feel the warm welcome here from so many tzadikim. The chizuk helps cope with the pain. Will start to work on myself asap. I'm a little scared of women blackmailing me. Will try to teach out to the guys you mentioned.

עמך אנוכי בצרה
but ......

Welcome.

Welcome RK,

It's fortunate you found this site. 
Welcome. 

You got your warm welcomes, now
Some straight talk. 

Alot of folks come on here,  some people are her for a little bit some for more, some people after some time they got it off their chest. It's euphoric and they feel better  and they think they're cured,  they drift off and then it gets bad. 

You have to ask yourself what would you be willing to do to get better,  take the sum total of lusting energy you expended, now ask yourself are you willing to use at least as much energy in the other direction to get better? 

It'll get difficult,  very difficult you will need to take alot of steps that may be uncomfortable and very painful,  but that is what it takes. 

If you make these moves,  and follow the lead of the professionals you'll improve.

Your wife (and children? ) deserves a loyal husband so bite down and get your stuff together. This is life and death.  

if you really care, do whatever it takes. No matter the price. 
Be honest and humble. 

Best of Hatzlocha, we are here to lend a hand and offer encouragement, you'll need it. 

Yesod

Yesod?

i thought you're in rehab - what's with the gloves??

you need a karma or woodford?

WELCOME!  Jump right in.  Some great ideas to get you started have already been mentioned. Keep posting.

It souds like you are ready to do whatever it takes to recover.

Thank for the welcome. Exactly right! I'll do whatever it takes to get clean. But I'm still confused where to start.