skeptical


Ty skeptical. I have really found #2 to be very helpful to me. Because even though I seem to have become addicted to GYE, since it is always on my mind, whenever I begin to start slipping, all of the guys here on the GYE forum pop into my mind, and I say "Gee, If so many guys are working so hard on this, can't I hold back this time." Since I'm (in skeptical words) "Staying connected even during tough times", it always stays in my mind.

stillgoing wrote:


Both are important reminders. The first one particularly resonates with me, and is something I have been trying to work on actively. For much of my life I was resigned to being unhappy, feeling like there was nothing I could do. For me it was not so much the mental encouragement that I needed (I had read tons on reframing and on focusing on positives etc. and all it did for me was make me feel worse.) Recently I have been much more actively trying to find things to do that I enjoy, spend time with people whose company I enjoy etc. and it has definitely helped.

The second point is also key. I know when I am engaged with this with all the wonderful people here; when I know I am fighting a personal battle, but do so amongst an army of fighters, there is great Chizuk.

Thanks guys for the posts. I am definitely going to try to keep both points in mind.

I heard a line from in a Shiur that was a powerful idea. I think it was from Rav Yeruchem, who said that the biggest Yetzer Hora is for a person to not think of themselves as important.

When a person thinks of themselves as significant, special and important,it gives them energy to do the things they have to do, and when they have to avoid things, they carry themselves with the mentality that "this is below me."

I swung by the mall today to pick up some things and the mall is obviously designed to catch your attention (as is the way that most people dress nowadays outside the Frum community.)

Walking around with that idea, that I'm too important to let these things ensnare me made the whole experience pretty much a breeze not to fall.

I know that I won't always find it so easy, but it was a really empowering experience B"H.

Going to post because I know it is good for me.

B"H Yom Tov, which is often a time of struggle, went by smoothly. Working on doing things I enjoy, avoiding stress, and (trying) to get enough sleep. Overall feeling better than I have in a really long time (ever?) and hope and pray that that is part of the healing process.

Feel like I'm talking to myself a bit but I'm ok with that as it means I should listen. Otherwise no one is listening and I wouldn't want that lol.

Been focusing on improving overall perspective and trying to find ways to enjoy myself, relax etc. Can't say some moments are not a struggle but B"H I think/hope/pray that I am moving forward a bit.

I would tell you that many people are reading your thread, but then you might think that you don't need to listen yourself.
KOT
KIT (more often?)
SG

stillgoing wrote:




I'm noticing there's abbreviations I still don't know. KIT? SG? Is that still going?

Keep In Touch

Still Going

gibbor120 wrote:


Thanks

B"H I am still going. Some days are easier than others, and I've met failure many times, but still truckin' as some people here like to say.

Hatzileini Na wrote:


Who might that be?

cordnoy wrote:


Well if no one has told you, I assume you aren't supposed to know

B"H things are going pretty well, though I'm a little concerned since I am really struggling with sleep these day (as evidenced by the fact I am on the computer at 4:35 AM after maybe 2 hours of sleep if that much.) Not sleeping is often a major indirect trigger because it impacts how I feel and pretty much everything else.

Bez"H the recognition of this, will help me be fine. I know it's "just being tired" and I've had that a million times before.

We are all here with you chaver.

serenity wrote:


Thanks.

(This next part is not particularly directed at you Serenity, but I figured once posting...)
I had a difficult conversation with a young lady tonight (I believe in a previous post I've mentioned being in Shidduchim) and now having a lot of trouble sleeping, both issues that often took aim at my self-image. B"H it feels like with the years of work invested I am slowly, slowly learning to remove my self-image from the "table" to some degree (in that it is not something that is dependent on what others think or things out of my control like sleeping; and that there is inherent self-worth in being a Tzelem Elokim. Hopefully I can hold on to that with both hands.

Thanks for sharing what you are experiencing. I think you will find many here can relate to low self-esteem and sleep issues.

Yes, as serenity said, many of us can relate to self esteem issues.
The dating process can be very tough on self esteem - and in my experience, it is easier to have self esteem after marriage.
I look at young people and see how insecure and uncomfortable in their own skins they are.
So hold with. It may help you to know that you will feel good about yourself and more comfortable with who you are with the passage of time.
Of course, sobriety and sanity and doing what you're supposed to, may be one of the biggest facilitators of self esteem.
You should find a zivug hagun beshaa tova umutzlachas.