I'm starting this thread as a place for people to post one idea in 3 sentences or less that they feel is most important for new members to informed of. This can including anything, including about how to work GYE, but the most important thing to write is a concept (mindset) or a tool or resource that new members will find the most helpful. Please post your idea below:

Great idea Cap!

A three-pronged approach of motivation, determination, and a plan. You have to want it, you need a strategy of how you will do it, and a support system to help you follow through. Each is important, but one without the others will inhibit long-term progress.

Learn the toolbox, the mini-courses, and the e-book The Battle of the Generation in the library. They will help you reach your goals more efficiently.

Embrace the pain of withdrawal, its a sign of movement in the right direction. 

full accountability here on the forum and with a mentor 

Best thread ever.... I absolutely LOVE giving advice (whilst pretending to be above it all...). So here we go:

1. Don't start a new thread for every post. Stick to your original thread and click "reply topic." A mistake many newcomers make.
2. Believe in yourself. Hashem loves you to bits and gave you challenges in order to reach greatness (read TBOTG).
3. Understand yourself & your YH. Watch the many inspiring videos of GYE, especially this one for when you're tempted.

Although you feel right now it’s impossible to change, it’s not! You can do it and one day it will easier and yo won’t want to turn back.  You just have to get into a new routine.

1] There is a lot going on in GYE, everyone is different and different methods work for them, try slowly the more common methods and see what works for you without any anxiety, or get a mentor to help you through it.
2] Do it at your own pace, when your ready to get a mentor or post, do it and only then.
3] We all were once afraid of posting or getting a mentor - it's perfectly fine.

Start with a small goal for how many clean days you want to reach — but focus on each day as its own challenge.
Don’t look back, and don’t worry about tomorrow, because you can’t control it.
Just focus on staying clean today.
On GYE, we call it ‘One Day At A Time’ (ODAAT)

You will probably fall again. Don't give up no matter how low you feel. Iterate your way to greatness.

chosemyshem wrote on 29 Jul 2025 19:08:

It takes time to master breaking free and therefore most people still fall after signing up but each person is different regarding whether he will have a setback or how many setbacks he will have before breaking free. A setback doesn't necessarily mean that you aren't making progress. A better marker of progress would be whether you get up quickly after a fall and whether you adjust your plan to make sure you don't fall again.

Don't just have a goal to avoid negative for 90 days. Do something positive that will build you and make you more motivated and stronger- do that positive thing every day for 90 days as well! Some suggestions are in my signature, or the Flight To Freedom plan.

The harsh realization that the holy grail you finally discovered isn't living up to its promise is par for the course.

It’s hard to take the step to come on GYE. 
It’s really hard to take the plunge and write that first post, to share your story. 

Amidst the chorus of welcomes, you’ll be encouraged to reach out to a mentor (which is a terrific idea), but which is also extremely difficult to get yourself to do. After (often) decades of hiding with shame and guilt it’s excruciatingly hard to make a call. 

My advice is: Take your time. 

These forums alone have tremendous value. Posting has tremendous value and great dividends. There’s a lot to learn- so much valuable life experience! There no where else that people have ever shared their most personal al of stories. You can learn SO much.
Connecting with people on the forums is an incredibly powerful step to freedom.
Eventually, real relationships with mentors and friends are the next level, but it sometimes take time and growth to really get there and be ready for it. When you finally make the call to a mentor you’ll be glad you did. But it’s ok to start slow. 
Don’t be daunted. Do what you’re comfortable with and stick around. It’s better to do what you’re ready for when you get there…

And maybe more importantly:

To me, GYE means HOPE. That’s the main thing. So many of us thought that there was no hope for us anymore. After the lonely years and years and failures we would just have to live with the secret burden of it all. Coming here, we learn that so many, in the worst straits, have found freedom. And you can hope and believe  that YOU CAN FIND FREEDOM TOO. 

GYE means hope of being able to finally change. Hope of new beginnings. Hope of no longer being alone. Hope of finding your deeper, better self again, and hope of so much more…

If you’re a new guy reading this: Welcome!
Here’s a warm hand, 
chaimoigen

CO that's a lot more than three sentences. . . 

1] Don't let shame get in the way of doing what you need to get clean. 
1.5] Getting honest with other people is probably the best way to break through the wall of shame, besides the many other benefits of connection.
2] Do what works for you.