Premise
EasyPeasy is an adaptation of Allan Carr's Easyway to Quit Smoking. The basic premise of the book is that it takes your mindset from being one of a user that enjoys porn (or Youtube, IG, Tiktok, etc.) and sees quitting as something hard to do, to a non-user that sees no benefit in using porn and sees quitting as the most natural thing in the world to do. You probably don't do hard drugs like heroine. If you read the book, you'll see porn like heroine: something that only harms you and provides no benefit, and is therefore very easy to not consume. That's why it's called EasyPeasy: because quitting is easy! You'll want to read the book, but here are some of the basic ideas of the book:
7 Core Ideas of the Book
1. You want to quit porn. Don’t forget this. You decided to escape the trap once and for all. Taking "one quick peek" will only suck you back in. This might seem tempting, except...
2. The trap has no benefit to it. There is no advantage to porn. You might think that it helps you release, escape, deal with stress, etc. But in all of these cases, remember that the non-addict deals with these daily struggles of life better than an addict. Your addiction will only make and keep things worse! Porn doesn't relieve stress – it creates stress!
3. Withdrawal symptoms are mild. Remember, it is your fear of withdrawal symptoms that keeps you hooked. It’s what makes you relapse. It’s what makes you have “just one peek.” But there is nothing to fear at all! The withdrawal symptoms are mild at best. You’ve gone through them countless times whether it be due to friends, family, school, or work. Biologically, there is nothing to fear. You won’t explode.
4. The real issue is psychological. It is the fear. It is the crutch that tells you that porn addiction will help you find fulfillment. It will help you fill the void of your life. It will do no such thing. If anything, it created the void in the first place. The larger fact is that you must know where these false beliefs came from. Primarily from:
5. Over a lifetime of looking at media, social media, friends, society, etc., you’ve been fed the lie that sex is the most important thing in the world. They tell you that without sex, you are incomplete. That you must always be seeking sex. That if you don’t, you’re a loser. Start looking out for these things. Don’t fear missing out on these delusions again. They are all lies anyways! They are told by people to make you feeling less worthy and hooked so that you can stay addicted to their apps, their products and services, and buy whatever they’re selling them.
6. You’ve been "brainwashed" over a lifetime. So reversing the lies will take some time. Affirm to yourself everyday about the truths you’ve uncovered in this book. Tell yourself how excited you are to become free from the porn trap. How great it feels to let the poison out. How life gets better when you’re a non-addict. You cannot passively do this. You must actively seek out positive messages and tell them to yourself. Please please please do this! Otherwise, you might slip up again.
7. In case you slip up, don’t beat yourself up! Remember, that is part of the trap. Get back up, re-read the book, and try again. The brainwashing takes time to reverse. Affirm the truth to yourself: you weren't happy being a user. That's why you quit!
Emergency Reminder:
If you’re feeling “on edge” with withdrawal and want to take “just one peek”, remember:
Change the meaning of what you’re feeling. Don’t think that your body is asking for its fix, instead, tell yourself: “Wow! This is how it feels like when the poison drains out of me!” Or think, "That isn't a real urge, because I don't actually want porn anymore, now that I've read the book. That's a withdrawal urge! It's a sign of my brain and body becoming more healthy!"
Change the meaning of what you’re feeling and withdrawals will be easily overcome. You’re not fighting (i.e. using your willpower). You are changing the meaning!
Coda
These notes were adapted from notes I found elsewhere on the book. I hope this at least gives you an idea of what the book is about, as well as giving you some notes to refer back to from time to time or in a moment of forgetfulness of your decision to quit (i.e., an urge). These notes are definitely not a substitute for reading (or listening to, there's an audiobook linked in the pdf!) the book. Thanks and good luck, although you don't really need luck, you just need about 5 hours of time to read the book. If you have a commute, you could easily listen to the audiobook over a few days. Don't think about quitting before reading the book, this will be a barrier to starting. Just think "I don't have to quit at all, I'm just reading this book because I'm an intellectually curious person who enjoys reading new things!" This will make it easier to get started. You might want to print out the PDF so you can read it in a less distracted environment than a screen. Bathroom time is your friend in this regard, I find I do my best thinking on the loo.
Please post any questions or insights in the thread, so others may benefit. Thank you!