Ok so ive got all the filters out there and i dont even have internet at home aside from my wifes phone which has data of course. She has covenant eyes and web chaver. So how do i slip? Im amazing at finding the holes and then filling them up after the fall. Ill notice. A certain app has inappropriate pics so ill look and then ill have my wife install an app coder. I borrowed a friends portable harddrive to transfer laptop data and found on his harddrive inappropriate tv shows and watched them. I noticed that i can search google images withought being signed in to the filter.... Weird nothing else works except that. I am constantly trying to block myself but there is always something if u look for it that will fall into your life. One more example... I work for someone who recently gave the his employees a work phone... It had data i fell and then blocked it all up. This will never end. As technology increases more and more ways are becomibg available to see and access anything. What is there to do? Any ideas? Ive read all the books and seforim and handbooks and attitudes and perspectives and i think everyone will agree with me, the battle is avoiding the battle and what im trying to point out that avoiding the battle us getting harder and harder and harder. Please write back your suggestions.

Um... been there... done that... I have covenant eyes... I know all the loopholes... I used to take advantage of them...

I have access to unfiltered internet all the time. The key to being clean is us not our ability to access innapropriate stuff. Ofcourse we need to try to minimize our opportunities to fall but as you pointed out, if there's a will to fall, there's a way to fall.

I agree that the key is avoiding the battle, but that doesn't mean to make sure we have no access it means to make sure we have no lust.

I'll try to be more specific if you like but I gotta go now.

Good shabbos

I used to super-block my internet, and then work hard to find holes, or fall whenever open-internet happened upon me.
Now I cooled down, my filtering.. ואין הדבר תלוי אלא בי
You're so right. Relying on filtering is not going to be the eitzah.
Good Shabbos!

I would love to hear you explain what you mean. How does someone not lust? 
 

truevision wrote on 03 Jul 2016 02:41:

Welcome,

The answer to that question can be found in the white book.

And for elaboration look out for the ship with 8000+ oars

truevision wrote on 01 Jul 2016 21:52:

Many of us have been doing the same in the past.
I can talk for myself. I try very much not to touch an unfiltered device no matter in which state of mind I'm in. All it takes is 3 tiny sec' and I broke my sobriety which is very precious to me.
At work my computer is monitored by the company so I'm very careful.

I love this peace of Gimara,

ברכת רבי יוחנן בן זכאי לתלמידיו בטרם מותו

"כשחלה רבי יוחנן בן זכאי נכנסו תלמידיו לבקרו... אמרו לו: רבינו ברכנו. אמר להם: יהי רצון שתהא מורא שמים עליכם כמורא בשר ודם.  אמרו לו תלמידיו: עד כאן? אמר להם: ולואי, תדעו כשאדם עובר עבירה אומר שלא יראני אדם

על זה השיב להם רבי יוחנן בן זכאי, שאמנם כן בפועל מורא בשר ודם גדול יותר ממורא שמים. אמת, מצד ההכרה השכלית גדול המורא שמים הרבה יותר ממורא בשר ודם, אך ההכרה החושית פועלת הרבה יותר על האדם מההכרה השכלית, ולכן המציאות היא שהמורא מפני בשר ודם גדול יותר ממורא שמים

Bets wishes.

DT Whom are you quoting?

I agree; installing filters is only part of the solution. Only relying on filters will not do it because ultimately you can always buy a new device, borrow one...
All available band-aid solutions should be used indeed but we need to find a proper way to stay clean. 
I suggest to stay a little longer on this forum and look for inspiration (success stories, what helped others...). 
IMHO, basically all it takes is to decide to get clean (our first step) and then to surrender to Hashem, let Him take over (but don't underestimate this part, this is the hardest). 
Once you surrender, make sure to continue doing whatever works for you (12 steps, conferences...) and don't become complacent. 
 

Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts and suggestions. I agree with you one hundred percent. I considered taking up 12 step conference etc but im too afraid of my wife finding out. And my schedule is so tight. Ironically work gave us these phones and i had mine all locked up but i first downloaded tge gye app which i never had before being that i didnt have a smart phone and for the first time i find that its actually helping me fight the battle being involved. At any rate thanks again. With hashems help we will all win this battle
 

Yeah me too

I tried to desist my wife from ordering iPhones for us

She did

A year later I joined GYE and I think a big part of my sobriety is the fact that I have this stupid iPhone and can keep conversing with my great friends on GYE

It was a blessing in Disgyes

my I tells me not to buy an I phone.
With all the advantages, I know the disadvantages as well.
Everyone should do what's good for him.
 

truevision wrote on 03 Jul 2016 02:41:

What I meant is something like this. There are two types of lust. One of them is the attraction that a normal healthy male has to most women. The other is one that's caused by the need to release some sort of tension.

The first is something that we can't change. It's a plain and simple tayvah and we can control ourselves and not lust. The less we do it the easier it becomes. 

The second one is what really causes us to fall. A lot of us use lust, porn and masturbation to self soothe. Very much the same way some people use food, movies, drugs, books, sleep, etc. to relieve the negative feelings they have. 
The problem is that like many things we do, we don't realize what the real motivation for it is. So we get into a cycle of falling and trying to stop. We fall, feel bad, decide to stop, and then the stressors start building up until we fall. The problem is that since we thought we fell  because we just couldn't control ourselves we try working on self control. Really we need to be working on the real causes.

Hope this made sense.

I once heard this from a clever guy.
If it makes you feel good then "don't" do it,
you'll anyways regret it a second later.