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The iPhone Song
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TOPIC: The iPhone Song 7877 Views

The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 14:01 #266324

  • kedusha
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I don't believe this has been posted, so here goes!

If you still use a flip phone, take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back.
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Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!
Last Edit: 19 Oct 2015 14:04 by kedusha.

Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 15:51 #266338

  • Markz
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Ahem... Sorry just clearin my throat
Em, Kedusha is that you singing there?
I thought with a name like yours you wouldn't know what an iPhone is, and you would be singing in yiddish
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Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 16:19 #266342

  • kedusha
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Unfortunately, I know what so-called "Smart phones" are, even though I don't use one.

My Yiddish is not very good, but I'm working on it - I recently purchased this book.

easy-shmeezyguidetoyiddish.jpg
Just as an alcoholic needs to avoid that first sip, a lust addict needs to avoid that first slip.Slip today? No way! ;)Fall today? No way, Jose'!
Last Edit: 19 Oct 2015 16:20 by kedusha.

Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 16:57 #266346

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When is that app being released?
And will I be kicked off gye if I don't install it?
My iPhone is vibrating violently now from tzitterin'
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Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 21:48 #266376

  • eslaasos
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Love it!

Do you have the lyrics? If not, I might try to transcribe them, maybe sing it by the Shabbos table. Any other place this is posted so I don't have to advertise where I found it?
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Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 22:03 #266378

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Eslaasos, just get permission, post it on Matzav.com vosisneies or msn.com then you'll have a kosher mare mokom, and hey - share the link with us soon pls
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Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 22:37 #266379

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eslaasos wrote:
Love it!

Do you have the lyrics? If not, I might try to transcribe them, maybe sing it by the Shabbos table. Any other place this is posted so I don't have to advertise where I found it?


At the iPhone store!
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Re: The iPhone Song 19 Oct 2015 23:30 #266382

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Handbook | Skep's Tips
My threads:
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/236327-Bigmoish-tries-to-be-good
www.guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/236329-Bigmoishs-path-to-tahara

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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 00:16 #266384

  • eslaasos
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Bigmoish wrote:


Thanks. Let's save everyone else some time and post the lyrics directly.

Way back in the stone age,
It wasn’t yet the phone age,
It was two cans and a string
Or you were all a lone-age

But nowadays we call,
All ppl large and small
If you don’t have a cell phone
You are Neanderthal

A cell phones a good start
But why not make it smart,
A phone that has a data plan
And is a work of art

My phone is so elite
The world is at my feet,
My life is now the internet
My life is now complete

Productivity, great efficiency,
Ill save so much time, now that I’m online,
Doing all my needs, at blazing 4G speeds,
Ill save so much time, now that I’m online,

I got my new device, for a gevaldige price,
The buttons are responsive and the screen is really nice.

For an entire day, I scroll and tap and play,
I’ve had 8 chats with Siri boy I cant put it away.

The next three days or four, I browse the itunes store,
I bought a hundred seven apps im buying 40 more.

I’m sure you will agree, this great technology,
Is gonna help me be, at peak efficiency.
HIGH

The news I heard was great, a new firmware update, I think that ill install it now although its getting late.

And after this new patch, Ill install my apps from scratch,
the fact it took a day of life is such a minor catch.

It took me just a few more days I didn’t wanna fail
But now ive got my google docs and also google mail.
I got my contacts in my phone and also in the cloud,
I’m gonna save such time with that, I’ve never been so proud.

HIGH

A few things my phone lacks, Ill fix them with some hacks,
I now can send an email to myself, not just a fax.

It only took six weeks, and several hacks and tweaks.

With input and suggestions from a hundred iphone geeks.

I have four thousand facebook friends I take them where I go
And if I have a sip of tea they are the first to know.

I pity all those backwards folks who don’t have facebook walls,
I’m sure it takes them so much time to make four thousand calls.

HIGH

One day when I was loading apps, one thing led to the next, I emailed talked and tweeted and I sent another text,
I clicked on several videos, I surfed through several sites,
My nights turned into days, my days turned into nights.

One day my siri says to me “You need to get a life”
Are you sure you’re my siri, you sound just like my wife.
You haven’t seen your wifes face now, in over half a year,
Your children think that tatty bought a phone and disappeared.

You’ve really become selfish, think of yourself alone,
And maybe that’s the reason that they call it an Iphone.
I’m gonna help you one last time, my fine, time-saving chap,
I’m downloading for you right now, a great time-saving app.

When you click on this brand new app, your life will be your own,
when you click on this app my friend, it detonates your phone!

BOOM!!

My life now is mine,
Now that I’m offline,
Life’s not undermined trying to save time

You can keep those vids, ill take my wife and kids,
Life’s not undermined just to save some time
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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 02:47 #266400

  • Markz
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Hey Eslaasos, its on the GYE website HERE
- since before we joined gye?

Maybe we should arrange a kumzitz? You'll sing 'cos you know the lyrics, Bigmoish can do the boom-pa's, Kedusha will install the apps.
Cordnoy will serve Coffee, Watson English tea - who will tell all my Facebook friends?
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AND WE'LL HAVE A BLAST!!! (like Kedusha's profile image)
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Last Edit: 20 Oct 2015 02:56 by Markz.

Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 03:33 #266401

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GYE kumzitz? Sign me up!
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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 20:55 #266469

  • mesayin
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OMG Thank you for the song.

It's about time someone came out with such a song and B"H for that.

I remember a couple of years ago some acapella came out with a song that made fun of the rabbanim for the issur of internet, I tell ya I was steaming mad, so this song really makes me feel a lot better.
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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 21:07 #266472

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Now those guys are fuming
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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 21:30 #266478

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If they were lucky, they found GYE or a different medium and are now cheering for the iphone Song.
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Re: The iPhone Song 20 Oct 2015 21:34 #266480

  • doingtshuva
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Very nice and cute
the piece I loved the most is:
And maybe that’s the reason that they call it an Iphone.
 *  NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!
 *  I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.
 *  Being curios made me lust and get into trouble.

אָמַר רבי יוחנן: אֵבֶר קָטָן יֵשׁ לוֹ לָאָדָם, מַרְעִיבוֹ = שָׂבֵעַ, מַשְׂבִּיעוֹ = רָעֵב

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Last Edit: 20 Oct 2015 21:35 by doingtshuva.
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