I am sorry Ploni, but while there are very few rules here, George, I think, did not come here to work on his shemiras Shabbos.
If you would like to propose that, send him a private message.
Perhaps I am wrong, but I think it's a bit out of place.

Sorry again and thanks

To my friends MT and TZ, I want to say that of course masturbating compuslively is a bris issue, too. But my point is that there are a huge number of guys for whom seing their struggle as what it is not, is the main thing holding them in the problem. I meet guy after guy who keeps using porn and sex with himself and does not get clean because he insists on seeing the entire thing as about kedushas haBris.

There are many sweet chassidishe guys and yeshivishe guys I can connect you with on the phone who will tell you that the big change came for them when they finally realized that their religious problem was actually not mainly a religious one. In other words, that their issue was not really that they are resho'im. Now, they may have indeed been resho'im (and may still be, depending on your definition of that)! But they came to see that this was not the issue, as I will be"H explain.

Now, for many sweet, good yidden, it sounds crazy to say that "being a rosho is not your main problem". It sounds like one is saying goodness doesn't matter, c"v. Not true.

Yes! Their (our) behavior was bad. Very bad sin. But once they realized that it was also crazy and stupid from a totally Derech Eretz perspective, they were able to quit and get into recovery. And in recovery they are. And life is amazingly changed. And they are clean - or at least cleaner than ever.

Until that conclusion, they could not stop sinning, at all, and were mostly getting worse.

And telling them that their recovery 'is really just Teshuvah dressed up in plain clothes' is just as silly as thinking that an addict says he or she is an addict just to kill the guilt that depresses them and makes them sin again. It's missing the point entirely.

Finally, a moshol:

There are many things that are ossur and also dangerous and unhealthy. But when Chaza"l say chamira sakanta me'isura, does that mean that there is no issur? No. There is surely still issur - but their point is that the sakonah is far more relevant than the issur, even though sakonah is a secular issue (and so it is distinct from 'issur').

Same thing here. There is vadai pure evil and hence issur itself in sex and lust addiction - unlike alcoholism. And for the normal Jew there is Teshuvah for the issur. But for the addict, there is is no Teshuvah, for Teshuvah will not work. For the addict there is sakonah. He is sick and will not get well. The illness overrides the issur aspect completely. Sakanta chamirah me'isura.

You may think this a stretch, but I don't: The Ba'al Shem Tov used an emphasis on simcha and kabolah to raise the downtrodden masses of his time. What about telling them to learn a little more Torah? What about "Hafoch boh v'hafoch boh dekula boh"? What about "ki heim chayeynu"? No, that would spell churban. He dealt with the sakonah of the times in his way. And see the rebirth that came from it.

Many addicts in recovery discover that the sakonah must be the only focus - for the addict has crossed into sakonah from issur. His sanity and future are in the balance, unlike the sinner. That is his 1st step.

I think it is a tragedy that some people in recovery tell non-addicts that "you must come to believe you are powerless and addicted". They are not. There is issur and non-addicts need to fight and fight! But addicts are the ones for whom that does not work. Their own stories - not the pontification of others - must tell them this. They (we) are failures, and eventually see that. They alone, need to depend on G-d and cannot. And that is all the 12 steps are for. Letting go and getting a G-d.

The drinker and masturabter both play G-d in their addiction and lifestyle, no matter how religious they may be, though they do not see it.

But a normal person just sins.

This seems like a very fine hair to split, but it is the difference between recovery and more of the same garbage, for so many I meet. And I have been meeting at least one new guy a week now, on the phone - just on GYE. And nearly all tell the very same sad story. I am not making this up.

'Chizzuk' will kill them, their families, and their future - if they are addicts.