Q&A

By obormottel

"Workingmyprogram" asks: The klippa has us so confused - he makes us think we need to run to churches and goyim for help. We have the power of tefilla which is the strongest eitzah of all! Cry out to Hashem with genuine tears, and you will feel His closeness! Why all the ...

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Do I really need to stop?

By obormottel

Question: I'm breaking free from porn, not masturbation. Does the one affect the other in terms of addiction or not? The 90-day chart for me isn't just a game to follow the rules for. I want to achieve my goal with it. Of course, I will do what is necessary in order to br...

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Behavior during marriage

By obormottel

Dear Crossroads, Excellent question. It seems that overall you are working on yourself and doing well, but you are still struggling with occasional falls. You should know that there is almost never such a thing as an "overcharged libido" by nature. Rather, our sages tell ...

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Swinebook and Other Social Media

By obormottel

A girl asked us: This is a bit embarrassing but I have this desire to look at my Israeli cousin's non-tznius friends online (Facebook & Instagram). Is this coming from a place where I wish I could look as good as them, or is it the yetzer hara trying to get me to lo...

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Is Sex Really That Bad?

By obormottel

GYE Member asks: Having a sexual relationship with a woman not married to you is considered bad. Hooking up with a prostitute is a dirty act. Having a sexual relationship with a mom is horrific.Having a sexual relationship with a minor is just as bad.Having a sexual relat...

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The Orthodox Transgender Dillema

By obormottel

Question: What happens to "Frummies" who are gay or transgender? There will always be a percentage of people in any given community who are somehow just born like this and there is no way to change them. Sometimes nature makes a mistake and assigns the incorrect gender ...

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FAQ for GYE's Live Groups

By the.guard

Join GYE English-Speaking Live Groups Why does GYE have live meetings, isn’t SA enough? It is important to emphasize that GYE's live groups are not meant to compete with SA in anyway. They are only meant to help those who would anyway not be going to SA now, or who are ...

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Progress not Perfection

By obormottel

I just read a Medrash today that asks, "Why does Hashem forgive the sins of the Yidden and not those of the goyim?" Answers the Medrash, that when a goy sins it's because he wants to throw off the yoke of Heaven. But when a Yid sins, it's only out of taavah or laziness, b...

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Does the Torah understand my plight?

By obormottel

Duvid Chaim asks: It’s always been a frustration of mine and many many men I talk to - that the Gemaras don’t “seem” to address addictions. No frum struggler wants to feel like the Torah doesn’t understand his plight. If you or anyone else has some insights, please sha...

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Can 12 Steps be used by non-Addicts?

By obormottel

Dov Answers: I'm told by a CSAT friend of mine that the current opinion among many CSATs is that it's better to avoid using the 'addict' label and model with clients, at least initially, and that giving the label is potentially damaging for many who are not addicts (and c...

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Abused, Addicted & Hate Sex with My Husband. What now?

By obormottel

Miri writes: Hi. Your organization seems to be wonderful and helpful to many people. Hashem should pay you all back thousand-fold!!! I am not sure if you can help me with this but I'm a bit stuck and not sure where to turn right now. I had a sexual experience when I was...

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Puberty - Talk About It

By the.guard

A mother wrote: My son is a good happy erlich boy. No exposure to magazines or computers. We live in a chasidish neighborhood so he doesn't get to see too much pritzus. I notice he has nocturnal emissions often. How often is normal? Also my younger son who is his roommate...

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I'm 15. Why can't I hang out with girls?

By obormottel

Hi. I'm 15 years old and I care about Hashem a lot, but why should I stop hanging out with girls? GYE Answered: Please see page 15-16 of this booklet called "Dear Bochur". It would be better if you read from page 9 already, to understand more about the issue. And if y...

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10 Year Old Watching Porn

By the.guard

Hello, Thank you for your wonderful site. I am a teacher in a religious, Jewish school in Germany. The children in the school often have unfiltered access to the internet (there is little awareness of the dangers here). There is one 10-year-old boy who, from his speech,...

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Discussion with 14 Year Old Boy

By the.guard

A 14 year old boy wrote: So I started doing the TaPHSiC Method, and I ended up falling, so now I have to tell someone about the problem. I'm thinking either my dad or my Rav. What I wanted to know is how to do it. I'm sure they'd both be understanding, but I'm still not s...

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The Mind Rules over the Heart... or Does It?

By obormottel

Question: I have a question for Rabbi Twerski or any Chabad rabbi who is on the GYE board. How do the 12-steps go with the concept of “moach shalit al halev” (“Mind rules over the heart”)? GYE Responds: Good question. Let's take the example of someone who has Diabetes. Fo...

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The Magnitude and Root-Causes of Today’s Kedusha Crisis

By the.guard

An email received by GYE from Rabbi Y.W: Dear GYE, My partner and I are directors of a local kiruv organization that realizes that nowadays many in the frum community need a tremendous amount of kiruv and chizuk as well. I am aware of the enormous help GYE provides, and t...

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Why is masturbation a sin? It's natural!

By GYE Admin

Dear Mother of Boys, Great question! Here's the thing. Sins are not like parking tickets--where the violation is clear and the fine is established. In the spiritual realm, Hashem judges each person and each sin according to their specific circumstances. What could be cons...

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