Hi everyone I'm new to gye (approximately 17 days). B"H I found gye (probably gods gift to mankind) and I've read the handbook which is incredible stuff. I started the 90 day challenge. For the first time in my life I feel like I have a real chance to complete a significant amount of days without masturbating. Before I found gye, of course I tried but after a while of crying and beating myself up about how stuck I am I couldn't give it my all anymore. That was until I found gye and this amazing community! I've read through the fourms and the warmth and chizzuk that is given is incredible and it's something I want to be a part of. I've created this post Bec every single time that I have an urge, I want to think that if I give in I would have to come on to the fourms and let my brothers know that I had a fall. If I can ask that you please help me and teach me the way and help me when I'm down that would be incredible and it would mean the world to me!  

Thank you

Welcome!
By posting on the forum you are showing you are willing and ready to put in effort, to overcome this challenge.
Know your posts will be seen and hold you accountable
Hatzlacha 
Feel free to direct message me. 

Today is a dark day for me. Today is the first time I failed the 90 day challenge.

Shalom Growing Talmid

Take it day by day.
The one day at a time lifestyle.

If needs be, the one hour at a time lifestyle.

If needs be, the 10 minutes at a time lifestyle.

From my experience, when you have a fall, the positive action is to learn why you fell.

Then be aware that this can be a trigger for you, a cause of falling.

It can be many reasons; tiredness, stress, depression, lust etc.

We all feel bad when we fall, but be being on here you show that you actually don't want to fall.
So you have good intent.

Take small steps.

Day by day.

Shabbat Shalom.

This fall is one of the hardest falls that I had to deal with. The more I hope I'll be able to do it  the more I believe I can do it, the more pain I feel when I fall. For the first time in a long time I felt I was capable of doing it and a fall just shows me that I wasn't as strong as I hoped I was. I won't stop fighting but I'm just venting and expressing what I feel hoping that I'll feel a little better after this post. Thank you iwillnevergiveup and colincolin for ur help. 

Sorry you felt let down by the fact that you joined gye and didn’t make it to 900 days on 1st try.

Maybe try what I did, don’t focus on the days - at all. Take a tool that really works and run with it and Keep on Trucking :-)

Growing_talmid, if you miss an exit while driving, will you treat it as a bad day?Just recalculate and get back on track. It does not mean you're a bad driver.



If you fall off your bike while learning how to ride, is it a catastrophe? No. It just means you need some more practice.

Like ColinColin said, try to analyze what went wrong and update your plan for next time. Make sure you have a good solid plan that is realistic for you. Eventually, the mistakes will become more and more infrequent. 

Even if you slip, if you pick yourself up right away, instead of getting depressed about, the slip will barely make a dent to your long term progress... 

Sorry for the fall. 
It could take months before you make it to 90 days... Months of work.
You can't begin to learn to run, and make a marathon 3 days later, it will just kill you. 
You have to do it by little steps at the beginning. At your rythme.

The first rule of the 90 days challenge is... Don't think about the 90 days The most important is the work on yourself, this is more important than absolutly make it to 90 days.

It's an effect of addiction that we don't see us as we really are. And also to make us great objectives that we can't reach, and to be in depression...

Take it one day at a time, stay humble with humble objectives, begin the long and deep work, and don't lose hope