here it is!!
yidtryingharder wrote on 30 Oct 2014 00:11:
I've been reading this thread from cover to cover and want to thank all involved for all the pearls of wisdom that lie here within these quotes are things that struck me as gr8 and usefull (not to say the other stuff wasn't) more to come as I come to the finish line. (im on page55/62) Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear Yetzer Hara,
As advise from Skeptical and Pidaini, I am writing you this letter. This is what I will be telling you when you come knocking again, and I know you will...you @#$%.
At first, I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinking, I could never live without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights thinking, how you did me wrong
And I grew strong and I learned how to get along
And so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here with that sneaky look upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I'd known for just one second you'd be back to bother me
Go on now, go, walk out the door, just turn around now
Cause you're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one, who tried to hurt me with your lie?
Did you think I'd crumble? Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh, no, not I, I will survive
Oh, as long as I know how to live, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live, I've got a family to give
And I'll survive, I will survive, hey, hey
It took all the strength I had not to fall apart
Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart
And I spent, oh, so many nights just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry but now I hold my head up high
And you see me, somebody new
I'm not that chained up little person still infatuated with you
And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free
But now I'm saving all my living for Someone Who's loving me
and that's God...every moment
b'hatzlachah
Hear ye; hear ye!
When the tayvah comes a brewin'
And the desires begin to stirrin'
Need a checklist of actions to do some churnin'
To get rid of this fire that's burnin'
First things first, say it out loud
Scream it from the rooftops; it's not the time to be proud (hear that fellows)
Verbalize to God that I know I aint in control
And then perhaps, take a five minute stroll (in a safe place)
Time to reassess where it is I am holdin'
Go back to Step 1 - to which we are beholden
Make sure I accept that I will always have this struggle
And that's ok... livin' life on a bubble
No; I will not be one who in life is white-knucklin'
For one can get bogged down if he is constantly strugglin'
Review those tools and make sure they penetrate
to go on livin' life in a true happy state
Nothin' to be gained by lettin' in da little sneak
He will never be satisfied with just one click or quick peek
So throw him da hell out! Let him prowl on da weak!
I am a "12 stepper" and a strong GYE Geek!
So in conclusion for now, for that's all that counts
I have the wherewithal to give him that bounce
I will go on with life to a life that's well worth it
Not the one ha has in mind, for that's a load full of ...
Can I hold out for the next day or two?
Doubt it....but I shouldn't be thinkin' about that.
Can I hold out for right now?
Myself....probably not.
With God's help?
He can do anythin'!
Do I need to ask him?
Probably.
Have I?
Not yet.
So what da @#$% are you waitin' for?
"The journey of a mile begins with a single step"
My head is dizzy from all this thinkin'....
God bless ya' all.
I know I am addicted.
I know the lust, desire for.....will always be there.
I thank God that I am learnin' the tools to deal with this.
The big battles I have been winnin' for 15 months.
The last two times, it wasn't even a struggle, which is real good.
the daily battles, issues, temptations, I know when I win and when I lose.
Winnin' feels much better.
To all you addicts out there....
To all you non-addicts out there....
To all ya' guys who are uncertain what you are....
To all ya' fellows who are a hybrid....
hatzlachah
Title
FREE AT LAST (without bein' overconfident)
My wife goin' away
brings back memories
of all that i'd plan
on how I would please
my lustful desires
which knew no limits
what would I start with
and how would I finish?
Several days beforehand
the fantasies would have begun
and nothin' else would matter
no work or learnin' would get done
Mind focused intensely
on fulfillin' (ha...like that's possible) my lust
Slowly buildin' up
for that (slowly) was a must
The porn and the clothin'
plus my object of desire
my blood would be racin'
excitement pulsin' higher
The freedom in the house
the bedroom especially
everythin' would be perfect
the ultimate ecstasy
in my olden days I'd get graphic
every detail I would share
but now that's no longer my focus
so we'll leave the past right there
suffice it to say
that when it was over and it reached closure
a dream come true of lust and sex
and a 'hope' for a 'next time' in the near future
And now I am free again
the wife is away
and im busy at work
there's no time to play
entered my mind
not a thought of fantasy
should I pinch myself
is this sobriety?
In a mode of recovery
there is no room for a stray thought
for there will only be one endin'
death or doom will be brought
So, do I have control?
Am I an addict?
Addicted, I am
I know that I'm sick.
There is just one thin' that I own
and that is the ability
that when that urge invades
I can stay in reality
Acceptance and surrender
Whatever you call it
Is it God or twelve steps
Who gives a @#$%?
I never had time after desire would strike
couldn't hit a button to snooze
Now, there are precious seconds
and it's my life to choose
Do I wanna choose death
where I will be spiralin' outta control
Or will I do the smart thin'
and choose life instead?
Will this freedom always last
so long as this poem does rhyme?
I'll leave that for the thinkers
I'm one day at a time.
thank you all
found them on old threads
