Welcome back. Happy to hear you are doing well. You were missed.

Still alive and well, Boruch HaShem!
I've been real busy with things...neighbors building, parnasa, etc.
still am really...but I see "a light at the end of the tunnel".

Just wanted to check in and tell everyone I'm o.k.
and to have a great Shabbos!
Yosef

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 05 May 2017 15:13:

Boruch mechaya meisim. We really missed you and were concerned. Happy to hear that you are doing well. We miss your leadership. Good Shabbos.

Hashem Help Me wrote on 05 May 2017 16:46:

Woohoo! Keep going, Yosef!

Great to hear from you yosef.

KUTGW!!

Wow, it's been awhile.
Since Pesach, things have been hectic.
Just checking in. 
Doing good. Boruch HaShem.
Not updating my chart, since I'm nervous that will weirdly mess me up.
----------------
Bar Mitzvah coming up this Shabbos!
Wow. 
First son. HUGE deal. He's awesome and pure. 
I want to be a better example and father.
I am going cold turkey from the computer, which is, let's face it, my main pitfall.
If I actually LIVE my life and stay away from the computer, I will be FAR more successful.
This is a gift for my son, for myself, and for HaShem.
-----------
There has been a wet dream here and there. But I look at that as a win.
My wife is not available enough. She makes the test a whole lot harder to pass.
Yes, it's all from HaShem. And I need to daven better for Him to give me a "normal, regular, 
healthy sex life" so that I'm not so tested/tempted to fail/fall.

Welcome back. Mazel tov on the bar mitzva. May Hashem give you much nachas. Wonderful to hear you are doing so well. And great idea for a bar mitzva gift, and as you write, for yourself too.

Mazal Tov! May Hashem grant you much nachas from your son and the rest of your family as well. 



Hatzlacha and KUTGW!

Mazel Tov!

My Mom is staying for another week, since we live far away from each other.
It was great having everybody here for the Bar Mitzvah,
and it's great that she is here for Shabbos and another week!
Some natural tension and comments, but overall, it's worth it.
-------
Woke up to a wet dream this morning.
Taking it in stride.
The far worse alternative would be masturbating, so I look at it as a win.
It's a bodily need that unfortunately is not being met by my wife.
She has a doctor's appointment in the next couple of weeks to see what's going on.
------
Good Shabbos!

WOW.
My Mom is judging me on everything...
I am not learning enough, getting to davening early enough, getting to sleep early enough...

the house is not clean enough, the kids don't know how to read well enough, and my son doesn't 
know his math tables well enough...

This is going to be HARD.
She loves me and wants the best for me...
and what she says is largely true...
which makes it hard to dismiss...
and makes it sting.

Talk about "triggers"!
WOW.

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 23 Jun 2017 12:06:

I feel for you brother
Ouch 
That must be painful

Is it reasonable?
Maybe the struggle is too difficult?
Does Gd really want us to struggle?

If this is a bodily need, and you are trying your best to fight it because the rabbis forbid it, and yet it's  almost impossible...

Maybe speak with your LOR and explain the situation to find out if there's a heter of sorts and the struggle can be minimized?

Markz wrote on 25 Jun 2017 10:36:

Hi Yosef,

A few things. First, I think what Markz is trying to say is that it isn't your wife's responsibility to take care of your "bodily" needs. A woman has a Halacic obligation to be with her husband if she is able, but as my Rebbi said often, "uch und vey
" if you have to pull out your marriage contract to force your wife to do her obligations. And crrainky, the way Chazal put it is a man is supposed to see intimacy as the way to fulfill his obligation to her- he has no obligation to be with her if she's not interested. I can't imagine that your wife would be very turned on if she heard that she isn't fulfilling your "bodily need". 

In regard to your Mom, any way you can respectfully ask her to please refrain from criticizing?

Hashem Help Me wrote on 20 Apr 2017 20:32:

About 5 things in a row went wrong...like losing 5 games in a row in tennis. I feel defeated and like I want to cheer myself up. The thought of looking at forbidden things and/or masturbating has come up.
I know things will turn around and I will win a few games.
Just thought I would write in...kind of like an S.O.S
All chizuk welcome.
I have to find a good substitute to cheer me up that isn't usser.
I still have the whole day left...hopefully this will turn around right now.
The fact that I wrote now in this vulnerable spot was a 1 game win right there.

WOW...you guys are all so supportive...glad I reached out with my S.O.S.

Massive headache. I took the day off. I will stay clean.
Son called from school. He is being sent home...some mix-up and the teacher got angry.
He is an EXCELLENT student....but today, it didn't surprise me to lose another game.
Good thing for me that tomorrow is another day. And the match isn't nearly over...even if I lose a set or two.